Chapter 36

Bette stepped out into the dimly lit room with a smile on her face. Tina turned in her chair, smiling back, as she watched Bette’s index finger run along the rim of her wine glass seductively. She had seen her do this countless times over the years, and yet, tonight there was newness to it.

“I can’t believe you did this,” Tina said in awe. “Just when I thought I couldn’t love you more, you do something like this, and knock me completely off my feet.”

Bette’s answer came in the form of a cocked eyebrow and smile while she slowly began to walk toward the table.

“Babe,” Tina said as she started to get up in an effort to meet Bette as she crossed the room.

“No,” Bette said quietly. “Stay there T.”

“Why?”

“I want to etch this moment in my mind forever.”

“Bette,” Tina said breathlessly, slightly embarrassed and taken aback by Bette’s gaze. Bette’s eyes surveyed every detail, appreciating the beautiful sight in front of her. She smiled as Tina slightly blushed, color running up her neck and caressing her cheeks.

Bette finally reached the table and leaned down to gently kiss Tina’s lips while Tina looked up at her in wonderment. The taste of the memorable wine on both of their lips served as a potent combination to conjure up a special memory.

“I’m pleasantly surprised you remembered,” Bette said smiling as she looked down at the love of her life.

“The wine?”

“I thought you might, but I was afraid it was so long ago that you wouldn’t remember every detail.”

“Oh but I do, I remember everything about the first time we made love, right down to this wine. We were at your house, candles were lit just like they are now, and in fact those same flowers were in a vase on the table.”

“Yes they were,” Bette said smiling.

“You went to the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of wine,” Tina said as she got up from her seat and stood in Bette’s arms. “This exact wine.”

Tina drained the remainder of her glass and set it on the table along with Bette’s half full one. She leaned in and lightly brushed her lips against Bette’s and then moved to the side of her face and kissed her neck as she talked quietly.

“You never took your eyes off mine when you poured the wine in the glasses.”

“Wow you remember more then I do,” Bette said smiling as an overwhelming desire shot through her body as a result of Tina’s lips near her ear. She could feel Tina’s breath on her skin. Bette’s reaction was to hold on tighter to Tina’s waist and lean into Tina’s body. Tina lightly ran her nose on Bette’s cheek as she continued to talk in a tone just above a whisper.

“I doubt that given the set up.”

“The flowers didn’t tip you off?” Bette questioned.

“No, they’re nice, but the wine is unique,” Tina said quietly as she sucked on Bette’s earlobe and placed her hands on Bette’s hips to steady her. “Just as that night was.”

“If you keep doing that we won’t get through this date,” Bette muttered quietly as she tilted her head to one side to allow Tina full access to her neck.

Tina smiled as she leaned in and gently kissed Bette’s neck while her thumbs began to massage Bette’s hipbones.

“I could never forget the way you touched me so gently when we made love for the first time,” Tina whispered. “You forced me into communicating every detail of what I needed. Nobody had ever taken so much time exploring what I liked before and it was such an amazing turn-on to be teased for hours.”

“We’ve come a long way,” Bette muttered as Tina licked her neck slowly.

“We have,” Tina smiled at Bette’s reaction to her tongue. “I know your body better then my own most times. My body’s reaction to you, it’s almost frightening even after all this time how much I need you.”

“I need you too Tina.”

“I know,” Tina said contemplating her words to follow. “But that first time was so different for us simply because you had been with women before.”

“Not the one I love,” Bette corrected her.

Bette wrapped her arms around Tina and held her tight as a soft melody began to play, enveloping them. Tina’s eyes lit up, once again, in recognition of the significance of the song softly playing. She looked into Bette’s eyes with love and amazement.

“I can’t believe you even arranged this song to play,” Tina said shocked as she blinked back tears. “This is an amazing trip down memory lane.”

“I thought it’s time we relive the best ones instead of the ones that caused us so much pain,” Bette smiled as she began to sway back and forth taking Tina with her.

Tina smiled as she felt Bette’s dance skills begin to take over and the two of them effortlessly moved around the room. Bette’s hand rested comfortably in the small of Tina’s back as the other held Tina’s hand gently.

“I was nervous the first time we danced,” Tina admitted looking into Bette’s eyes just as she did the first time they stepped onto a dance floor.

“It was the first time you met the group,” Bette smiled as she turned Tina around and allowed her hand to pull her in tighter against her body.

“God I felt like I was being grilled 6 ways to Sunday by Alice.”

“She may have been a little jealous.”

“A little? Her eyes bore into the back of my head while we were on the dance floor. It was funny though, it suddenly didn’t matter when I was in your arms dancing. I had never danced with a woman before and I was so happy my first time doing it was with you.”

“As corny as it sounds, I felt like I hadn’t either when I held you in my arms.”

“That is corny,” Tina said laughing. “But I love it because knowing us, I know it’s true.”

Bette and Tina enjoyed the remaining part of the song in silence, swaying to the music, and enjoying their closeness and privacy the room provided. When the music ended, Bette remained holding onto Tina’s hand and escorted her back to the table. They sat across from one another, the candlelight reflecting every emotion being experienced by each woman.

“How did you pull this off?” Tina asked with a genuine smile on her face.

“Funny thing,” Bette took a sip of wine to calm her nerves. “As you know, I went to confront Alice about my fears. Well as it turns out, it was the best thing I could have ever done.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because you’ve taught me to confront my fears and when someone does that, suddenly they can amaze themselves and walk right through them.”

“I did that?” Tina seemed surprised by Bette’s admission.

“I went over there and told her I felt like I would lose people through another judgment period regarding Kristen, but then when I was talking, I suddenly realized that as long as I had you and Angelica I’d be fine.”

“You will always have us,” Tina said taking Bette’s hand and caressing it with her thumb.

“Recently I’ve doubted that when it comes to Angelica.”

“She’ll come around.”

“When we send her off to college,” Bette joked.

“She’ll eventually see that us being together is a good thing,” Tina smiled at Bette’s attempt at humor for a serious conversation.

“She has a funny perspective on things so one never knows with our teenager.”

“She really is like all other teenagers, it’s just that she has a few unique challenges,” Tina said in Angelica’s defense.

“I think you called that ‘otherness’ at one time.”

“I was as wrong as she is,” Tina simply said. “Her challenges make her the wonderful person she is and there’s no reason to apologize for that. She’s an amazing girl.”

Bette sat in silence reflecting upon her preparation for this date, which included writing the letter to Angelica about asking Tina to marry her. She thought back to the countless drafts, and the pressure she encountered, as time began to slip away from her and the date neared. She wondered if Angelica had read the letter yet, and if so, what her reaction was to Bette’s words.

“Where did you go just now?” Tina asked as she rubbed Bette’s hand in comfort.

“I’m right here.”

“I know you well enough to read every flicker in your eyes Babe. What’s going on?”

“I’m thinking what my reaction would be if you were sitting here with someone else right now,” Bette lied, but justified it in her head because it truly was a concern of hers until she discovered that there wasn’t a date set up for Tina. She saw it as a chance for her to seize the moment regarding her love for Tina. “There’s no way I could let that happen and it took me confronting Alice to see that.”

“Oh,” Tina’s voice reflected disappointment, but kept her smile on her face to alert Bette that she was teasing with her question. “So no Belena?”

“Ah you’re familiar with the term?”

“I have it in several e-mails from Alice,” Tina said laughing and rolling her eyes.

“Well I think that Al ultimately wanted this exact picture to unfold,” Bette said biting her lower lip in a flirtatious manner. “I think she wanted to force us to see what we’ve been hiding from.”

“I never hid,” Tina said seriously. “I’ve always wanted this, and I might have lost my way in the past, but you’ve always been in my heart.”

Tina’s focus was broken as the door slowly opened and the wait staff entered with their dinners.

“I should have known,” Tina said laughing as she leaned back to allow the server room to place her dinner plate.

“It had to be lobster.”

“Maine in the Fall,” Tina said smiling as memories washed over her.

“Our first weekend trip away.”

“I miss these memories,” Tina continued to relive their past.

“I do too,” Bette agreed happily.

“I was amazed we could walk down by the docks and those boats came right to us practically.”

“Couldn’t ask for a fresher lobster then one literally right off the boat.”

“I loved that you arranged for us to eat on the beach that night.”

“I loved every moment of that, but not because of the beach,” Bette set her glass down, which was instantly refilled with wine by their waiter. “I loved every moment because I was with you.”

“You’ve thought of everything tonight haven’t you?”

“You’d be surprised,” Bette said laughing.

“Care to share?”

“In due time T,” Bette smiled as she took another sip of her wine. “All in due time.”


Alice put the first forkful of pasta in her mouth and moaned causing Kristen to smile.

“Dear Lord I’ve died and gone to heaven.”

“I thought you didn’t believe in God?” Kristen asked curiously.

“I didn’t until I tasted this pasta!”

“Now you’re just flattering me. Are you trying to get lucky?” Kristen arched her eyebrow seductively.

“Is it working?” Alice teased as she tried to hold her laughter in.

“Maybe,” Kristen blushed and looked away in an effort to hide her embarrassment.

“See,” Alice pointed at her. “Right there! You had nothing to say so you flirted to fill the space! Thus, proving my point that flirting has an entire top 10 list of reasons why people use it!”

“I was at a loss for words, I’ll give you that, but it seems strange to create a top 10 list about uses of flirting.”

“Please,” Alice scoffed. “I once contemplated doing a top 10 list of LA’s hottest nipples! A piece on flirting would be a major step up from Shane topping the nipple one!”

“Oh my God,” Kristen gasped. “Shane? Really?”

“You’d be amazed. They’re perfect!”

“Please tell me you didn’t sleep with her too?”

“No,” Alice chuckled. “The only friends I’ve slept with are Bette and Dana. Wow does that sound to you as bad as it sounds to me?”

“No,” Kristen said laughing and answered sarcastically. “It isn’t that bad that you’ve slept with an astounding percentage of your closest friends.”

Kristen laughed harder as Alice threw her napkin at her from across the table.

“I think it’s amazing that you can remain friends,” Kristen turned slightly serious. “I take comfort in that hoping Bette and I can get there one day.”

“You will. I think it’s easier for me because they weren’t right for me,” Alice said as she continued to eat. “If I thought either one of them was the one for me I would have fought harder to stay in the relationship.”

“I’ve always known that Bette was meant for Tina. I just allowed my heart to grow beyond where I think I should have in order to protect it.”

“I hope you can find room in your heart for someone else,” Alice said seriously. “You really are an amazing woman and I hope for the best for you.”

“I think I have room,” Kristen smiled. “I’d like to think that with the right person, I’ll open up and love again.”

“What type of person would be someone you could open up for?”

“I’m willing to try with the woman sitting across from me actually.”

A silence fell over Alice and Kristen until Alice met her eyes and smiled.

“Are we initiating Operation U-Haul?” Alice fought to keep her smile at bay while she read Kristen’s look of horror.

“Oh my God please tell me I did not fall into that stereotype?”

“No,” Alice began to laugh. “The look on your face was priceless though!”

After their laughing subsided, Alice set her fork down and smiled at Kristen.

“I haven’t had this much fun on a date in a long time.”

“Me either.”

“Well,” Alice said pretending to be flattered. “That’s because you dated boring people until now.”

“They weren’t all boring!”

“I can see why Bette loved you so much,” Alice’s tone turned the conversation in a serious direction. “I haven’t laughed this much in a long time.”

“I’m glad we aren’t staking out the restaurant where they are trying to figure out a way to gently let Tina down.”

“Can you believe we skated out of that debacle?”

“We?” Kristen arched her eyebrow in question.

“You knew what I was up to! You could have stopped it!”

“I tried!”

Alice’s response came in a soft chuckle as she shook her head in a manner in which Kristen could see she was teasing her.

“I’m happy you asked me out Alice,” Kristen said. “It means a lot.”

“Don’t thank me, I’m just hoping for another date,” Alice said with a smile. “Because believe me the pleasure is all mine.”



Tina placed another bite of lobster in her mouth as she smiled at Bette. She washed it down with a sip of wine and then reached across the table and touched Bette’s hand once again.

“Thank you,” Tina said sincerely. “I needed this more then you know.”

“Well I reacted poorly and needed to reassess my priorities. I’m sorry that I let it happen in the first place.”

“You don’t need to do all of this to make up for that Bette.”

“I didn’t actually do it to apologize, I did it because I want to celebrate.”

“What’s included in this celebration?”

“Oh that’s easy,” Bette said sipping her wine. “We’re celebrating love, commitment, communication…”

“Did you just say communication?” Tina interrupted.

“That I did,” Bette stabbed a piece of lobster and placed it in her mouth closing her eyes to savor the taste.

“It’s good isn’t it Babe?” Tina smiled watching Bette enjoy her dinner.

“That it is.”

Bette allowed her eyes to, once again, travel over Tina’s body to take in every detail. She took in the entire picture before she let her eyes fall, once again, on the pendant around Tina’s neck.

“I love the pendant on you.”

Tina’s fingers automatically touched the necklace as she smiled.

“Our third anniversary,” Tina said.

“I gave that to you when we had breakfast in bed.”

“God, we never got a chance to eat,” Tina snickered as memories flooded her mind about the morning they spent in bed. Tina got up to make Bette breakfast, looking over to ensure she was still asleep. However, when Tina left the room, Bette quickly opened her eyes and placed the velvet box she had been hiding on Tina’s pillow with the pendant inside. She propped herself up to watch as Tina came back into the room. Tina carried the tray hoping to surprise Bette, yet when she got back to their room, it was her that received the surprise.

“You shocked me when I walked back into the room,” Tina continued. “You had nothing on.”

“I was covered with a sheet,” Bette said seductively.

“From the waist down, the other parts were clearly beckoning to me.”

Bette’s response was to throw her head back and laugh loudly.

“I almost dropped the tray with all of your favorite food on it and the rose petals. Remember I had all those rose petals that ended up sticking to us later?”

“Your face was classic,” Bette said finally as her laughter subsided. “And yes I do remember the awful petals that crept into every crevice of my body.”

“Oh but I had so much fun tickling you with them.”

“God that was an amazing morning, my senses were on overload.”

“Mine were as well,” Tina smiled. “The only thing either one of us wore was this pendant. I wore it tonight because I needed a part of you with me for what I thought would be a miserable date with a Belena.”

“I’m always with you Tina, in your heart, just look there when you need me.”

“I do and I take comfort in that,” Tina said as she began to eat her lobster once again, enjoying each bite before taking another. “I am so amazed.”

“Stop, it’s dinner.”

“I thought it was a celebration?”

“Oh,” Bette said laughing. “It is!”

“Uh-huh,” Tina laughed as they relaxed into a familiar pattern of daily conversation.

Angelica placed the last piece of clothing for her overnight trip in her bag as she listened to Shane walk down the hall and mutter to herself about the scribbled directions on her piece of paper.

“Angelica?” Shane shouted when she reached the kitchen and was satisfied that she had done everything on her list. “Are you almost ready to go?”

“I guess,” Angelica shouted back as she looked at Bette’s letter once more. Her eyes filled up with tears as she struggled to read the words once again and comprehend what was glaring her in the face. She quickly wiped the tears away and grabbed her bag as she shoved Bette’s letter in her back pocket. She opened her door and walked down the hallway coming face to face with Shane in the kitchen.

“You’ve got everything PJ?”

Shane wrapped an arm around Angelica and led her into the family room. She could tell Angelica had been crying, but decided she wouldn’t push her to discuss what she likely could not answer, given she didn’t know what was contained in Bette’s letter.

“It doesn’t look like you’ve done anything,” Angelica pointed out as she surveyed the room. “You were working on something.”

“It can’t be that obvious according to Bette.”

“Do you know why?”

“No,” Shane shook her head. “I didn’t ask, but I could take a guess and come pretty close I think.”

“You want to know?”

“No,” Shane said smiling. “You are so like your Aunt Alice it’s scary.”

“Is that a compliment?”

“It can be,” Shane said chuckling. “You about ready?”

“Yeah,” Angelica said quietly not sure how to feel about what she knew would occur later that night.

“Let’s get out of here then shall we?”

Angelica silently followed Shane to the car as her mind began to process how drastically her life would change in one night.


Tina watched as the waiter cleared the plates on the table to give her and Bette room to relax.

“That was amazing,” Tina leaned back smiling.

“I’m glad you liked it.”

“Dare I ask what’s next?” Tina said as she smiled lovingly at Bette.

“Dance with me again,” Bette got up and held her hand out for Tina to take. “I asked them to bring an after dinner drink for us. I hope that’s ok?”

“Everything is perfect,” Tina said as she allowed Bette to change directions and dance with her stepping to the beat. “I’ve loved every moment of this night Bette.”

A different waiter entered the room discreetly and placed a small glass of ice wine at each table setting and left undetected as the song finished and Bette led Tina back to the table. Tina looked at the small glasses and then questioningly at Bette.

“It’s ice wine from Germany, the 2004 winner of bottle of the year.”

“This is new to me,” Tina said skeptically as she tasted the wine. “Wow that’s good!”

“I had it when I was in New York recently.”

“So this isn’t about us?”

“This is about the new us,” Bette smiled as she finished the last few sips of her expensive vintage. “I wanted to have a few new memories tonight.”

Bette watched as Tina finished her wine and looked around once more as if to memorize every last detail of the night.

“You ready?” Bette asked breaking into Tina’s thoughts.

Tina’s answer was a simple smile and nod. She got up gathering her purse and wrap and held onto Bette’s hands as they made their way through the restaurant and out front to the valet station. Bette handed the young worker Helena’s ticket and fished in her purse for a few dollars to tip him in appreciation. Tina began to laugh when Helena’s car rounded the corner.

“You didn’t?”

“I had to have some part of Helena to make myself a Belena.”

“You’re incorrigible.”

“Why is that?” Bette asked surprised at Tina’s reaction.

“So the best part of Helena is her car?” Tina asked laughing.

“Let’s go home,” Bette smiled as she opened the passenger side door for Tina and assisted her into the car.

Alice slowly allowed her tongue to snake into Kristen’s mouth as one hand rested on her back and the other on her thigh. Kristen fought for air as she felt Alice’s hand begin to massage her thigh, the moisture between her legs growing at an alarming rate.

“Oh,” Kristen said as she broke the kiss to take in a much-needed breath.

“We should slow down,” Alice pointed out futilely as they resumed their kiss.

Kristen parted her legs as Alice moved her hand to the inside of her thigh, silently begging Alice to touch here where she craved the most. Kristen reached between them and cupped Alice’s breast, angry at the amount of clothing each woman still had on. Alice slowed her hand by grabbing her wrist and pulling back from the kiss.

“I can’t,” Alice said breathless.

“Why?” Kristen asked instantly feeling rejected and embarrassed.

“It’s not what you think,” Alice said as she wiped her remaining smudged lipstick from her swollen lips. “You aren’t somebody that I should be sleeping with on the first date.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means I care too much about you, and where this is going, to let my raging hormones ruin what I want to be more then a quick fuck Kristen.”

“What is it you want Alice?”

“I want to try to make this work between us,” Alice said shyly. “I don’t want you to be a one night stand.”

Kristen stared at her with compassion in her eyes.

“I want to date you seriously Kristen.”

Angelica sat by the window in Shane’s house that faced the side of Bette’s. She could see the pool lights reflecting off the darkness of the night. Shane was allowing Angelica the space she thought she needed so she was sitting outside smoking. She was startled when Angelica put her hand on Shane’s shoulder.

“Shit you scared me!” Shane jumped.

“I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry.”

“No,” Shane shook it off willing her heart to stop pounding. “You ok?”

“I need to go to Mama B’s house for a second and didn’t want you to worry.”

“Why is that?”

“There’s something there I need to get,” Angelica said. “I’ll be back.”

Shane watched as Angelica made her way into Bette’s backyard and used her key to unlock the back door. She quickly walked past her room and into Bette’s, turning the light on, and hoping that Shane wasn’t still watching. She went to the nightstand next to Bette’s side of the bed and opened the drawer. Angelica flipped through papers, pictures, reading glasses, and a book before her hands connected with what she was looking for.

“Got ya!”

Angelica shut the drawer and flipped the lights off quickly. She locked the house back up quickly and ran back to Shane’s.

“I need to go back home Aunt Shane.”

“What?” Shane asked confused. “Why?”

“I need to get something that I forgot that I thought was at Mama B’s.”

“What are you looking for?”

“Something for my homework that I need,” Angelica said as she scuffed her feet on the pavement where she stood.

“Is it important Angie?”

“Yes.”

“Shit,” Shane said crushing her cigarette out on the pavement and throwing it into the grass. “If we’re going back we need to do it now. Let’s go.”

Shane quickly made her way out front while Angelica put her hands in her pockets and followed. She was nervous, but she knew in her heart she had to go back home.