Me, I’m Not…8

Ch 13

It felt wonderful. Money, the power of controlling my situation. That familiar feeling returned the feeling of promise, a new sensation almost. One that signaled an end to a mundane rut I had found myself in. No thoughts of Carmen, of Shane and our intense encounters, no fear…….then with the wrong hand played it was all gone.

Poker, a game if wits. A game of deceit. A game I was winning until that voice. That familiar voice of mine telling, willing me saying to me; risk it all, triple your worth get away from it all……

I listened.

 I heard the calling of my inner being saying to me what could go wrong. I had tuned 10 measly dollars into 350 thousand and instead of taking my winnings I bet it all. Its not enough to win, its not enough even to loose, it was the thrill and that gut wrenching hand…

A pair of three’s and I was finished…..and worse I was in debt to her…..Catherine Rothberg……..

“Come on…its not that bad…..I could have your legs broken……”

“That would end my torment faster…wouldn’t it?”

“Helena…..being my personal servant is not as bad as you would think……Somewhere in this nice big house is a room with view…….just for you…..We are gonna have fun…..so much fun….till mama takes the t-bird away………”

I would have preferred the broken legs in hindsight.

Her home a thing of gaudiness, gold glittering everywhere, plants potted high, velvet, brass, chandeliers. A home of elegance. A home that I would describe as beautiful even though I secretly thought it was tacky. And that is the way I use to be when I had money. I was false, dishonest and arrogant. I couldn’t help but wonder if this was not some kind of punishment……

“And if I choose not to?”

“Oh god I was hoping you would ask that question, I really do love to show off…….Jacky be a dear and get Ramon…please don’t forget the pliers…..”

Jacky was a tall man of long hair and very large build. He had muscles for his muscles. Ramon was not tall, he was slender of build. He was bought into the room on his knees. Evidence of a brutal beating collected his face. He groveled begging for more time. Catherine laughed at him. She had said that time was no longer on his side. Jacky used the pliers to pull out Ramon’s finger nails. It made my stomach turn. I have never seen violence like that. I had to look away. I attempted to walk away but Catherine would not allow me to.