I had other worries on my mind. She didn’t know that the girl she was kissing was me, but what was going to happen when she found out.

After that kiss, I finally confirmed what I had suspected all along.

I was in love with my best friend.

I was in love with Bette Porter.

***

I couldn’t sleep and stayed awake till dawn.

I had called Bette’s cell thrice since nine, but she didn’t answer.

My nerves were seriously jumping out of my skin.

I wondered if she had known that girl was me. How could she not have recognize my voice; and for that matter, how could I have not recognized hers! Was it the music or the alcohol? I didn’t know. All I knew is that right now, I needed to talk to Bette desperately.

But wait, what happens if she didn’t know it was me? I mean, she did drink a lot last night.

Ok, Helena. Calm the hell down.

I picked up my mobile for the forth time and dialed Bette’s number, to be once again greeted by her voicemail.

I decided to take proactive action against this paranoia.

I would buy her lunch and go over to her apartment; after all, I was worried about her.

I looked up at the clock which was hanging in my living room and watched the second hand tick to exactly eleven-thirty.

Time sure passed slowly when you were anxious.

◊◊◊

I had gotten three sets of sandwiches and juice from one of the delis that Bette and I loved to frequent for our Saturday lunches. I skillfully slipped through the front door when it was buzzed open by one of Bette’s neighbors, and headed up to her apartment. As I stood in front of her door, I felt my heart leap up into my throat as I took a deep breath and rang the bell.

There was no sound, not even the faint sound of footsteps. I waited for a few seconds and rang the bell again.

I heard a sudden thump, and a scurrying, before the footsteps came closer. The door creaked open and there was Bette looking absolutely hideous. Her hair resembled a rat’s nest; obviously her back-comb from last night was still tangled. Her eye liner was smudged underneath her eyes and she was still wearing her costume from the party.