Fan Fiction
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Carmen Such A Tease ( Chapter 4 -Finally getting laid)
Chapter 4
After Shane take a bath, she walk downstairs fully dress as before excluding the tie and the first three button of her shirt are open. “Hey baby where is everybody” as she saw Carmen sitting on the couch waiting for her. Carmen replied “Oh they are in the backyard and let go I m starving”.
Shane and Carmen walk to the backyard hand in hand as Shane sat beside her children and Carmen is on her right.
Shane: “Here baby (putting some more food in Carmen’s plate) thanks for waiting for me (pecks on Carmen cheek)
Before the dinner even end most of the children are in the house playing video games.
Gisele: “Mommy could we go play video games also (Smiling, show her teeth) please mommy”.
Shane: “Ok but take Jessica with you and remember to share”
Gisele nodded her head as she takes Jessica hand and went inside the house.
Now with the children inside the house Carmen decide to get frisky and put her hand on Shane torso and caressing it higher and higher put always didn’t touch where Shane needed the most.
One of Carmen’s Uncle: “Hey look what I brought (champagne), let drink”
Every adult around the dinner table cheered.
Dinner finish and everybody is off to their own business. Carmen was inside the house helping her mother clean up the dishes as a tipsy Shane is courting her.
Shane: “Baby did I tell you today that you look so so hot” (getting closer and closer to Carmen and wrap her arms around her waist and snuggle in the crook of her neck inhaling her sweet honey like scent.
Shane: “I can’t wait until I take you to bed and get freaky with you.
Carmen just smile and continue to do her task at hand.
Shane: “Maybe I take you there now”
Shane turn Carmen around and she put her hands on Carmen waist as she lift her up making Carmen squeal in shock and joy “ Shane!!!”
Shane: “Yep you going to be saying that all night” (smirk, as she start caring Carmen away on her shoulder.
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HOT!!!! You are great! I am totally hooked it up.
HOT!
hey rarely comment on this site but i gotta say this story was very hoooot and sweet..all ur stuff is!
I think your doing a great job especially with no particular experience in that fortay so keep it up.
Hey BC, you are doing very well with my favourite L Word couple. I’ve silently read your earlier posts and thought I’d let you know you’re doing a good job… KEEP IT COMING… just like Shane and Carmen. Thanks for writing. Please Post Soon.
Hi, I just read all four chapters (yay!!) and I think you’ve done a very good job with it. The grammar needs fixing (the spelling is fine), but that’s about it. The story is more important, and it’s more difficult to come up with, and you’ve done a very good job with that. I actually love the idea for your story – the tease. The buildup is sometimes more interesting than the act itself, and you did well in emphasizing that in this and in the previous chapters. Awesome. I can’t wait to see where you go with this story (like I said, I love the idea). And if you’d like help with the grammar, beta readers are a great way to go (I can help point you in the right direction, if you’d like). Like you said in the beginning of chapter two, you’ll get better, and I think writing more will definitely improve your skill. :) Once again, I can’t wait to read more.