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    I’ll tell you the truth .. chapter 2

    Looking into Tina’s concerned eyes Bette regretted her confession .. for some reason saying it out loud to Tina made it seem less important than she thought it was .. “I’m sorry .. that sounds stupid .. I don’t know .. I … I don’t know” .. she puled herself backwards away from her lover and rested her back on the chair ..

    "No Bette it’s not stupid .. just try to explain it more for me”

    "ah .. you didn’t want to carry our second baby .. and I don’t blame you .. you have your carrier and all of that but .. you never asked me if I wanted to carry our baby” now looking at the ground .. avoiding making any eye contact in that moment of vulnerability .. "sometimes I feel that you tolerate me because you’ve fallen in love with me .. and even you tried you couldn’t fall out of it .. and now you want less of me .. if that makes sense!”

    finding no words to say .. Tina reached for Bette’s hands .. she held them gently .. lifted them closer to her mouth and planted small kisses on the distal ends of her fingers .. she was crying ..

    finally she managed to speak .. “don’t say that .. don’t ever say that”

    "I don’t want to say it .. I don’t want to FEEL it T, I used to be proud of our perfect relationship .. I used to RESPECT myself for having you, keeping you, and more importantly for making you love me .. and when I drove you away from me I lost that .. I was surprised you still love me .. I was even surprised you didn’t hate me .. I hated myself for loosing you”

    "it’s not that I don’t have a choice .. I don’t love you because I have to .. I love you because no matter what I do I’ll always be aware of how great you are Bette .. God! How can you not see that” now Tina’s lips were on Bette’s .. trying to say what her words couldn’t say .. with a passionate long kiss .. that was only ended when Tina needed to catch her breath .. “you’re breathtaking B”

    looking deeply into the blonds eyes .. the brunette reached the ultimate state of vulnerability .. "the only way I can see it again is to see it in your eyes Tina”

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