There was never a moment to ourselves some days I didn’t even know who I was without the other girls. Most days, I didn’t notice we were way too busy to see anything about ourselves, never mind each other. Than after five years as the music industry changed, and record labels merged we were dropped suddenly. I was alone for the first time in my entire twenty-one-years on earth and for two weeks. I went on a drinking binge in America.

I was lost for so long afterwards, I returned to Dublin to figure out the next move I changed jobs a few times within the music industry over the next two years. At the same time, trying desperately to keep my twin sister from sinking into a state of depression; while I was able to shake it off with work. Keavy seemed to fall further and further unable to find herself lost in a trap of fame. Keavy didn’t know who she was, where she fit into the world without the group without being in my shadow. For years she complimented suicide, which has shaken me to my core even now nearly twenty years later.

In the middle of Keavy’s battle with depression, our cousin introduced me to a friend of hers, Aidan DeChance, a country star from America rising on the charts. I wasn’t prepared to fall in love when she set us up on the blind date, but the minute I saw him I was gobsmacked by how gorgeous he was, the fact that he was a musician only intrigued me more.

We dated for over a year before we tied the knot. For a while, Keavy even dated Aidan’s brother Tadhg but her depression caused them to fight even after discovering she was pregnant. Tadhg couldn’t handle the changes in Keavy’s moods or Keavy’s inability some days to even get out of bed, to go to work, so he left. Maybe I should have seen the warnings if his brother was such a prince that he would leave the woman he swore he loved who was pregnant with his child may be the apple didn’t fall far from the tree. I didn’t see the warning though if I did, I had no clue it was warning me to run to save myself from the same fate of Keavy’s depression.