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    The Beginning of the End

     

     

    Cat opened her eyes slowly. Her head ached as she reached up and placed her hand over her face, a painful reminder of what an awful night she had. An awful week even. She didn’t remember much since the night she and Frankie made love. The raw emotions and the old feelings that had resurfaced. They finally were able to speak openly and honestly. They reconnected. It was what a part of Cat had always hoped for….dreamed of. And it finally happened. And it was better than she ever imagined. But then she had to leave. And the rest of her night with Sam was filled with mixed emotions. Sam didn’t notice how reserved she was, she was just so happy to have Cat there with her friends. And in the days after, Sam worked the late shift. They saw very little of each other and it gave her room to try and process what had happened.

     

    She rolled over in bed and closed her eyes now…trying to put the night before out of her mind, but she couldn’t. “We need to talk…” her own words rang loudly now, even the morning after.

     

    “What’s on your mind Cat?” Sam replied, with a look of concern on her face. “If this is about me being on the night shift, I’m going to make it up to you…really.” she smiled.

    “No…it’s not that…it’s not you…it’s me.” Cat interrupted, as she nervously played with her fingers.

    “Hey, whatever it is…you can tell me.” Sam spoke softly now, as she sat down, reached out and held Cat’s hands.

    “It’s about me…and Frankie…” Cat looked up, her eyes searching Sam’s face for any kind of reaction.

    “What about you two?” Sam replied.

    “We…we finally resolved things…we had a long talk and realised that we still have feelings for each other. And I know how this sounds..”

    “I know how it sounds too. Do you still love her? Are you still in love with Frankie?” Sam’s words were direct and her pain was evident.

    “I…it’s not that simple..we’ve been best friends…”

    “It is that simple.” Sam spoke softly as she interrupted. She slid her hands away and stood up.

    “It’s not that simple…because I’m in love with you too…” Cat pleaded.

    “Well…you can’t have us both. And…and I can’t compete with the history you two have.” The words burned as they escaped her lips. It was a truth that she hadn’t realised until now.

    “I just need a few days…” She continued.

    “What do you mean? Cat replied, hoping that Sam would forgive her…that they could talk this through…that she would eventually understand.

    “I need a few days to find a flat, and then I can move out.” She looked at Cat, whose eyes were filled with tears. She continued “I’d leave now, but I don’t have anywhere to go..”

    “Stay…stay as long as you need.” Cat barely spoke the words. Her eyes were burning now and her chest aching.

    “I’ll sleep on the couch and I’ll start packing tomorrow.” Sam added, as she looked away. She knew this is what she had to do, but she couldn’t bear watching Cat cry. She swallowed the ball of emotion welling up inside her and walked away. She left for work without saying goodbye. And Cat spent the night and every other night since, curled up in bed…crying…and wondering…”What have I done?”

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