Shit.

How did anybody do this and live?

Maybe she should just forget it and go home.

No.

She was no coward. He could go fuck himself!

Ok, here goes.

She raised her hand and knocked three times.

Nothing.

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes, letting the hand holding the flowers fall by her side. She knocked again, louder this time. There was movement on the other side of the door. Finally, it opened. Holly was standing before her wearing an old sweatshirt, yoga pants, and an annoyed, if somewhat quizzical expression, looking kind of rumpled like she had been asleep.

Maybe this was a bad idea.

”Gail. Did you forget your keys?” Holly asked flatly.

”Um, you didn’t return my calls.” There was a knot growing in Gail’s stomach. It wasn’t that late, was it?

”Uh, yeah, about that.” Holly began, ”I was going to call you to tell you not to come over tonight. I need some space to sort some things out in my head…”

Holly didn’t want her.

She was too late.

She had done it again.

Holly was leaving her, just like everyone else.

It was like someone had just sucker punched her, hard. She tried to slam up her protective walls, to say something cutting, cruel even, but her mouth was too dry. She was bleeding. Holly was still speaking to her.

”So anyway, then I fell asleep on the couch.” She continued ”But since you’re here…”

Gail thrust the flowers at Holly’s chest. Holly’s hands caught the package reflexively with both hands.

”I got you flowers and I just wanted to ask you if you would be my girlfriend but if you don’t want to that’s ok I mean I know you’re mad and I’m not easy and I’m sorry if I didn’t stand up enough for you and I am probably fucking everything up and this is so stupid and I don’t even know why… Oh never mind.”

Gail spun on her heel and fled down the hall toward the emergency stairwell before Holly could see the tears

”Gail! Gail wait!”

Holly’s words made her stop in her tracks. She clutched her arms around herself and sagged, shoulders hunching. There were hurried shuffling footsteps behind her. There was a hand on her shoulder now, touching her lightly. She marveled at how such a soft touch could cause so much pain!