CHAPTER 4: Beyond Control

The rest of the afternoon flew by, though we didn’t do much. 

“Why don't we go do something?” she asked, breaking the silence. 

“Sure,” I answered.

I parked the Ferrari off the side of the road. The dark forest gloomed beside me. Alice skipped over to me as if nothing terrible was going to happen, even if she had envisioned something.

We walked along the shadowy road. Once I smelled it, I knew what was going to happen. On the edge of the street was a motorcycle, crashed into a tree. The owner lay next to it, crimson fluid covering the body. 

Without any control, I launched myself forward, crashing into Alice.

“Jazz, Jazz, stop!” She pushed, uselessly, on my chest. My thirst won out over my own control.

****~****

Morning eventually came. The sun rose with the bright light of day. I noticed Alice sitting in a corner, curling in on herself.

“Alice,” I breathed. 

“It happened. I couldn’t do anything,” she murmured lifelessly.

“I’m so sorry, Alice.”

“It’s not your fault, Jasper, it’s mine,” she told me.

“You didn’t kill anyone last night, I did. It cannot be your fault.”

“I couldn’t stop you,” she replied limply.

“Still not your burden.”

I lifted her off the floor and into my arms. 

“I love you, Jazz.”

“And I love you.”

****~****

My blood-quenched red eyes stared back at me through the mirror. How was I to forgive myself? Stupid, stupid! I yelled at myself inside my mind. Why couldn’t you have been a little more in control, you monster!? My mind raged on about my monstrous being. 

After some time, Alice opened the door to the bedroom.

“Jazz, stop. I hate it!”

“Alice, how can I possibly excuse myself of what I did?”

“Please.”

Pull yourself together. For Alice, it’s all for Alice. 

“Jasper, what can I do? Please,” she begged.

“All I ever wanted from you is to stay with me; as I will for you.”

“I can’t leave. You’re the only reason I can survive.”

As I sent a sense of ease into her, I took her hand.