“I was scared.” Her words coming out so vulnerable. No matter how mad this whole situation has made me, I can’t help but turn back around to hopefully hear her explanation.

                “Scared of what?” I ask, making my way closer to her.

                “Scared,” Her brown hazy eyes look into mine, as she lets out a deep sigh. “Scared that I would lose the only real friend I’ve had in a long time.”

                “You could never lose me Ashley, you know that but this,” I gesture to the space between us. “…keeping it a secret and me having to hear it from someone else?” I make my way closer to her, so that now we are mere inches away.

                “I know… it’s just…” Once again her eyes are back on the floor.

                “It’s just what Ashley? Look at me…what is it?” I raise my hand to her chin lifting it so that her stare is level with mine.

                “I’ve lost people before because of this…I didn’t want to lose you too.” She explains, as a tear makes its way down her cheek. I take my opportunity to wipe it off her cheek as she has done to me so many times before this.

                “Ashley, I love you…you’re my best friend, nothing could ever, ever change that okay?” She nods. “Now come here.” I envelope her in a hug, squeezing her with what I hope to be love, and understanding. For a second she doesn’t return it, until I make it clear I won’t let go.

That’s when she hugs me with everything she has left in her, freely letting her tears fall onto my shoulder.

                “I’m sorry Spencer, I’m so, so sorry.” She says in between sobs.

                “Shh, its okay…just promise me one thing?” I pull away, keeping my hands on her shoulders. “Promise to always tell me the truth? No matter how bad you think the outcome will be?” She lets out a laugh, which I’m always happy to hear, but right now ecstatic.

                “I promise.”

——

Ashley and I have been sitting on her living room couch, watching anything and everything. I haven’t let her go since we got down here, showing her I will always be here for her. We haven’t really spoken, not because it’s awkward, just because it isn’t necessary. I know she’s nervous, because she’s playing with the ring on her left finger…yet again.