I go online and google her; it is the only thing I can think of.  There are hundreds of matches.  Photo shoots, album information, touring info, fan sites, anything I want, except how to reach her, with the exception of the site that guarantees true star contact information for a small monthly credit card fee.  I’m so sure.  But, who would know where she is?

            “Lucy!”  Who am I kidding?  This is getting more ridiculous by the minute.  Track down the friend I abandoned three and a half years ago to ask for the number of the girlfriend I abandoned five years ago.  The last I had heard, she had gotten married; I don’t even know her new last name.  What am I going to do?  I’ll have to go to a concert and try to find a way to see her.  I discover that her next concert is in LA, of all places, in three days.  That is it; I book myself on a flight out tomorrow. 

            My mind is running on overdrive as I try to think of what to say.  What if I do see her?  What if she is with someone?  What if she is happy now?  I can’t sleep a wink.  I know I will have to take some time off at the office, so I go in early to break to news to Gus. 

            “I need sometime off, Gus.”

            “And I need you here.”  I don’t know why I have put up with him for so long.

            “Amy can cover for me while I am gone; this is something I have to do.”                       

             “Amy couldn’t tell her ass from a hole in the ground.  The answer is ‘NO’!”

            I stare at him.  I know this job has already cost me so much happiness and so many good years.  I do what has to be done.  “Fine.  I quit.”  With that I walk out of his office as he begins shouting something, but his yelling falls on deaf ears; I am gone.  I go to my office and grab the few personal items I have and walk out of the building.  I feel like a new woman.  I am going to put my life back together.  I am going to fill the void in my heart; I am going to get her back.