“Why are you still in bed?” She asks pulling the blankets off of me.

“Because my mom kept me up all night,” I tell her putting my blankets back on. “I’m tired.”

“Ok then, why aren’t you sleep?”

“I’m not sleepy just tired. I just want to lay her all day today.” I say pulling her in a laying down position with me. “You can keep me company.” She starts to run her hand through my hair.

“I can’t. I told Jessica I would go shopping with her today.”She says looking from me to my hair. “I was actually coming to see if you wanted to go with me?” She says moving her hand that was in my hair to caress my cheek.

“No. I think I’m okay here.” I say hoping she isn’t to disappointed that I’m still not comfortable going to far from home.

“Come on Ash, it’ll be fun.” She says pouting.

“Spencer…” I trill off knowing she knows what I’m thinking. She just looks at me for a second before getting off the bed.

“Ok, whatever. I’ll stop by later.” She says making her way to my bedroom door. I get up out of bed and stop her from leaving.

“Wait. Are you mad at me?” I ask.

“No.” She says quietly pulling me into her. “Sorry, I just… I don’t know. I just want you to get out of this house.”

“I do get out of the house. I’ve been going over your house for last couple of days.”

“I know. I just wanted to spend sometime with you in public. Witch is stupid know that I think about it because your not even out.” Spencer says with her eyes looking around the room but never settling on me. Maybe she thinks that our relationship will always be this complicated and I cant promise that it want for awhile, and I think that’s what she’s wanting me to do. To tell her I will go out into the world with her and say hello to every smiling face I pass but I can’t. I pull out of her arms.

“Maybe you should get going. Jessica’s probably waiting.” I tell her crawling back in my bed.

“Ashley…” She starts walking over to the bed. “I didn’t mean it how it sounded. I’m sorry, let’s talk.”

“Have fun Spencer. I think I’m going to take a nap.” I say turning away from her, wanting to end this conversation.  

“Ashley…” I cut her off.

“I’m tired.” I think she gets the hint after I don’t say anything for a few minutes, I hear the door shut.

I close my eyes trying to forget that I basically kicked Spencer out of my room. I don’t know if it’s me pushing her away or her pulling away. Maybe we’re both to broken to be with each other.

TBC