All three are smart. Kyla’s nice to everyone, so I don’t trust her sincerity. Ben tries to be better than everyone and usually fails. There was another Wally in Waldo’s kindergarten class, so we started calling him Waldo. (Talise thinks it makes him sound like the family dog.) He’s technology smart. Good with anything that has metal in it.

During her seven year affair, the loving Christine Davies always made sure to take care of her secret brood, including those who weren’t related to her by blood. Of course she left diaper changing to the nurses, but she was always "there for them". As a result, she was never there for me. When my mother was playing housewife at the Dennison house, I was left at the Davies estate with an army of "help" and, whenever he could wangle some time off, my father.

Dad only ever cared if I was okay, which let him turn a blind eye to the fact that my mother was always mysteriously pregnant. He taught me music on guitar, piano, and drums. He also taught me to practice every day so my mother was pleasantly surprised when she was left with her musical prodigy after the divorce. Even if I hated light, bounced off the walls, and went into "staring spells", I was still part of her showcase brood.

Then, when I was nine, the "big one" struck. A full on tonic-clonic, grand mal, whatever you want to call it seizure happened. The type that everyone associates with epilepsy, and I was stuck in status epilepticus for over an hour which isn’t good for your brain. Afterwards, I lost a lot of fine motor and language skills. Apparently, I was lucky. I gave up trying to coordinate my fingers on any instrument after that. Dad took an entire year off to make sure that I would be okay. I couldn’t even get dressed on my own. In the end, withdrawn and careful Talise ended as my assistant. Everyone else had too much going on in their lives to take care of a girl who could barely speak anymore. If it was anyone else, I’d say that giving a nine-year old responsibility for her epileptic sister is funny. We weren’t a perfect match, but we managed to make it work for nine years. With time, therapy, and Talise’s inner grammar Nazi, I made it at least back to school, even if I’m two years behind and in all the lowest classes. I still struggle to learn new things, but at least when I finish high school, I’ll be fairly independent.

Somehow, out of all of this Christine Woods became a hero for women neglected by their husbands. She and Joe became the poster parents for the perfect balance of family and success. It makes me sick.

That is our wonderful family.

Feel free to barf anytime.