Chapter 23: Labels Are So Wrong

After a long night of tears, confessions, and realizations Ashley was making her way to the tree. She wanted to see Spencer, she needed to see Spencer. Ashley rode in silence ignoring all her peers talking, screaming, running, punching, pushing, laughing, anything of the sort. She just ignored them and listened to the ‘clank clank’ of the four wheels beneath her. Right when she saw the tree with no girl sitting there, she knew. She knew it was all over. Spencer was gone, no longer hers.

Spencer was always at school before her, never was she late, never had she not sat on the grass waiting for her. Always had she sat atop the green lush grass, leaning back on the tree, headphones blaring, in wait for Ashley. It never changed, a daily ritual to each of them as Ashley always stood for at least five minutes with one foot on her board and one planted to the ground, just staring at Spencer. But now she stood that same way with no beautiful blonde with her eyes closed and rocking her head back in forth in sync with the music playing, this girl was not there to see. No, this time she was just staring at now dull green grass, ugly old damaged tree bark, and bare branches. Since the one thing that brought beauty to that one, once beautiful spot, was not sitting there, the place was ugly and beauty wouldn’t capture it until she sat atop that grass.

Ashley picked her board up off the ground and dragged her feet to the tree. She sat down, leaning against the tree, with no one to her right, no one occupying the spot where Spencer had sat a day earlier. Ashley lifted her knees while wrapping her arms around them and lowered her head. She just sat there letting the silence surround her, enter her, course through her veins. This silence held so much sadness, and a somber mood was in the atmosphere.

At this point Ashley didn’t care who saw. She didn’t care if she looked like an idiot sitting there crying her heart out for a girl she knew would never come, couldn’t come. She didn’t care who saw these tears spilling out of her eyes, because Spencer was gone and she couldn’t stop all of the emotions running through her body. She just let it all out with the tears falling and the whimpers shaking her body. She released it because the girl she wanted to needed to speak to wasn’t there and she was the only one who could stop or never make the tears come.