Is it possible for someone to be this beautiful? She is sleeping with bed hair and no make-up and she is more gorgeous now in this moment than I have ever seen. She is so peaceful in her sleep. The look on her face makes her look like she is a kid again enjoying life. Oh no. What was that look for? That look of pain and fear. She looks like she is being torn apart. What is going on?

            “No. Please don’t do this to me. I don’t want to be this person.” What is she talking about? “Please, it hurts. I just want to stop. I don’t want to wait for it to feel good. It doesn’t last. I need something that last.” She’s definitely having a bad dream. Is it about drugs? Drugs take a while to feel good right?

A tear rolls down Ashley’s cheek and without thinking I wipe it away with my thumb. I pull her close to me as she sleeps. It’s about three in the morning so she should be sound asleep. I just can’t lay here and watch her be haunted in her dreams. I wrap my arms around her and she holds on to me like she’s holding on for dear life. She mumbles something that I can’t hear and slowly starts to relax. She had had every muscle in her body clenched tightly.

 Her face started to soften as she relaxed and I just gently kissed her cheek. I knew I had to tell Ashley how I felt about her. I want to be what is good in her life that lasts. She has been through so much and I want her to know that there is good in this world. Her mother isn’t around to show her the love she needs and her father died in a car accident last fall. She has had a rough life that no one knows about. Everyone thinks that she’s just another spoiled rich kid that partied too much. She did party a lot but it wasn’t because she didn’t have a care in the world. She was looking for something to fill the void in her life so she turned to alcohol, drugs, and women. Now she thinks she’s worthless but I know that it’s really that she is priceless.

Ashley Davies acts like she’s a lion ready to fight but she is as gentle as a lamb. She is a fighter though. She fought to get out of the lifestyle she was in. She fought to get away from the drugs and alcohol. She slowly made her way out of the hole she had dug herself into. She is so strong and you can see it in her eyes. Those eyes tell you everything you will ever need to know about her. They hold the pain, love, hurt, sadness, happiness, and fear. You can truly look into her soul through her eyes. At least I can.

She’s laying here in my arms and I feel a tear slide down my cheek. I want to make Ashley so happy. I want her to be with me and love me like I love her. I know she can do it. It’ll just take time for her to fully trust herself, for her to allow herself to love and be loved in return.

I was just about to fall asleep when I heard Ashley plea softly, “save me Spencer.”