Shane, scared to death of the intense emotions she’d never thought she’d experience, argued that she would only break Jenny’s heart.  Jenny sadly replied that it was impossible to break what had already been shattered.  They lay enveloped in each other’s arms, wanting to pull apart but unable to physically force themselves to do so, until sleep overtook them.

Sunlight streamed in through the living room windows, piercing Shane’s eyelids and waking her from a peaceful slumber.  She lay thoughtfully, propped up on one elbow, studying the innocent and trusting expression on Jenny’s sleeping face.  Shane knew that no matter what happened, this would eventually end.  All relationships end in one form or another.  That was why Shane had always tried to avoid them.  She realized that this quasi-romance they had formed would one-day end as well.  Whether it happened sooner or it happened later, it would end, and one or both of them would end up hurt.  So Shane did the only thing that she knew to do.

Coming in that night, a girl on her arm, Shane made sure to flaunt the carnivorous intensions she had for her guest in front of Jenny.  Made sure to kiss the nameless girl in front of Jenny, her tongue stuck halfway down the girl’s throat but her eyes locked onto Jenny’s, watching as they slowly filled with tears.  Took the girl to her room and made quick work of it, all the while her heart aching as she imagined Jenny crying alone in her room.

After it was done, Shane sat in one corner of the dark room, smoking a cigarette.  It had to be done.  It had to be done.  She repeated the phrase aloud over and over to herself, trying to make herself fully believe it.  The pain she felt was unlike anything she had ever felt before, but Shane knew she had done the right thing.  It wasn’t meant to be.  People like her didn’t deserve to find that kind of love.  People like Jenny didn’t deserve to be mistreated or hurt.  Because, in the end, that was something Shane knew she couldn’t prevent.  It was in her nature, and she’d inevitably hurt Jenny.

She knew she’d hurt Jenny already, but realized that the pain and hurt that she could cause Jenny later would be worse.  It would hurt them both much, much worse later on if they allowed themselves to become invested in the relationship.

They were too different, yet too similar.  Shane could see something in Jenny that reminded her of her own self – something that existed in her before the world nearly ruined her.  Shane could see a love reflected in Jenny’s eyes that overwhelmed and overpowered her.  A love that threatened to be her undoing.

Before Jenny’s life was over, she would suffer enough pain and hurt.  She didn’t need Shane to cause any of that now. 

And Shane was scared.  Scared to death.  Afraid to let herself feel again, to let herself love again.  Afraid that if she gave in, she herself would be the one hurt.  So once again, she pushed away someone that cared, someone who was willing to see through the facade and discover the real Shane McCutcheon.