So Bette looked it up. S&M and Leather. First she went through female sexuality and narrowed down the search to lesbos. She wanted to avoid the nasty ***** that seemed to pervade the internet all the time. Bette leaned in close to look…closely. She was on an interesting site for S&M leather dykes, a group that met once a month. And one that held lectures. Bette scrolled down and looked at the lecture list. Branding, Genitorture, Flogging, Whipping, Ropes, Nipple torture, How to be a good submissive, how to find the right *****…..Leather, kinds of leather, how to use leather in your ***** life, leather groups, leather lectures, leather boots, leather fashion, leather styles, leather “daddies”. Bette didn’t what to feel. Only WOW. Bette didn’t know half the stuff that was on here. And the pictures, the pictures. She saw the looks in their eyes, in those submissives. They were the real ones in power, not the *****. The submissive se the rules, told you when to start when to stop…what to do. Bette could see the channeling between the partners, feeding off each others wants and needs. Bette exited the net and went back into the kitchen and put her cup in the sink. She had never felt more alone than now.

 Paxton came home late. Bette was in the den going over what needed to be done for tommorrow at her job. Paxton came home bearing take-out. He leane din the threshold looking at Bette, saying he didn’t feel like cooking. Bette smiled up at him and got up, kissing him on the cheek. Paxton went back into the kitchen and Bette followed him in there, the smells of the greek take-out making her water. Bette took out plates and utensils while Paxton got out the take-out, seperating them. He was a vegetarian but always got something with meat in it for Bette. They sat down and Bette picked out what she wanted. Paxton stuffed his face with greek salad. “So….how was work?” Paxton shrugged, went on eating. “Well my work was really great, i had such a great day………………………………..what do you tihnk about doing some S&M?” Paxton choked on his salad. His face went red and Bette hurriedly got a glass of water. He drank it while Bette patted him on the back. After he recovered Paxton stared at Bette. “Why?” he asked, Bette answered “It’s something different, we have our whole lives to explore, why not this?” Paxton’s lips curled…”but that’s so………gross, and weird” Bette felt herself get angry. “Well what the ***** do you call me sucking your *****? or you licking my *****? we both use those things to pee huh?” Paxton’s face looked hurt, “Im sorry, i’ll well i’ll give it some thought”. Bette nodded, she didn’t even know why she brought the whole thing up. she should know Paxton better. Last time she was too aggressive with him sexually he backed off, scared. Bette knew why, he had a very abusive father when he was young and saw him beat up his mother. Bette should have been more understanding. Bette reached over and stroked his hair. “you need a haircut Pax” Paxton grinned and touched her arm. “I love you Bette”.

 That night lying in bed Bette remembered that Tina hadn’t given back her tupperware thing yet. Well a good excuse to go over. Maybe even…maybe even bring up that book. Maybe she could look at it again. Bette turned around and watched her husband sleep. His eyes closed tight, his breath so slow. There was no way he was going to agree to do those things with her. Bette knew that. For some reason she dreamed about Tina, a blue Tina who was cooking bacon in Bette’s kitchen. Bette could swear she could smell the meat frying.

TBC