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An End Has a Start – Part 13
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“I was innocent. So I had to fight for my life. Our family. Our life together.” Bette’s voice was quaking now, her face twisted with emotion. “And I didn’t mean to do it… it just happened.”
Tina just stared at Bette, kept staring. She should say something. But what could she say? What was there to say?
Bette took a steadying breath, her voice deadly quiet. “She said she was still going to tell you because you deserved to know. Because she loved you, because you were her friend. She said she was trying to protect you from me. And then she said it was for the best that we didn’t get the baby. That bringing another child into the lies and deceit of our relationship would be a disaster.” Bette shook her head and looked at the ceiling. “And I just, I saw red. I snapped, and I-I grabbed her. And I shook her, I shook her just to try to make her shut up…” She rubbed at her mouth with the back of her hand.
Tina felt the strength leaving her legs and she groped for the table behind her, clutching at it. Did she want to hear the rest of this? Could she bear it? “And then?” Tina heard herself ask, her voice coming from what seemed very far away.
“Then…” Bette sighed, her voice hitching on her tears. “Then she lost her footing and started to fall backwards. She grabbed at me for balance and just for a second, just that one second, I-I wanted to let her fall, but I pulled her upright. And then I let her go…” Bette looked beyond Tina, into the distance as if seeing the scene play out before her once more. “We stood there looking at each other and I was so mad, so angry, but I couldn’t yell. She wasn’t afraid. She had no expression on her face, it was like this-this blank mask… I told her she was a worthless bitch. I said that no one could stand her and we all wanted her out of our lives. I said-I said I should have let her fall.” Bette looked down at the floor, hiccuping out a teary sigh. “’And Jenny looked at me… She looked at me and I could see that I’d hurt her, and I was just… glad, so glad I had. I-I wanted to hurt her, the same way she was hurting me…
“Then she turned away from me, and she started down the stairs, but she stopped with her back to me and leaned against the banister. I thought that maybe she was shocked, or-or dizzy from being shaken, I didn’t know. I didn’t care. And then I left. I didn’t want to be around her another moment.” Bette looked up, tears still streaming down her cheeks. “The next time I saw Jenny, she was… she was in the pool. And she was dead.”
“So you didn’t…” Tina tried, but her mouth wouldn’t let her form the word ‘kill’, “You didn’t really harm her, then?”
“Don’t you see, Tina? If it was a suicide, then I’m to blame. It’s my fault. The things I said to her probably pushed her over the edge. She was emotionally fragile. Disturbed and fragile. And I-I knew that. I’ve always known that. But I was so angry, I just wanted to… I couldn’t…” Bette trailed off, looking down at the floor again. “If she took her own life after what I said to her, then I might as well have pushed her off the balcony.”
The hairs on Tina’s arms stood on end. Bette had come so close to one kind of disaster, and even though she had escaped without committing a murder, if her speculation was true and Jenny had been impulsively moved to suicide because of that final showdown… that was a different kind of catastrophe. No wonder Bette had been such a mess these past few days.
“So you see,” Bette was saying, “I did kill Jenny. Not in the way… not in the way you might have thought I did, but all the same… it was my fault.” She rubbed her eyes and sighed, her body crumpling in on itself. “So… you know. Everything.”
“Yeah,” Tina acknowledged with a sinking heart. But what was she going to do now?
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your story would have made an awesome Season 6 or 7 & in my head it certainly is….
Tina needs to comfort Bette. Even though she lashed out at Jenny, it was a normal reaction. Jenny made the decision to end her own life, not Bette. Tina needs to hold Bette before she has a breakdown. PPS
It will take time to heal, but I don’t think Tina should take this against Bette. She has to put herself in her lover’s shoes. She didn’t kill Jenny. Sure, she feels guilty for psychologically pushing Jenny over the edge, but Jenny asked for it. Bette is as innocent as you and me, and we’re all guilty for wanting Jenny dead.
Don’t leave us like this!!!!! Are you kiddin’? Come oonnnnn! Please come back….please…oh pretty please. I must know the aftermath of this.
If I were Tina my arms would wrap themselves around Bette’s body and hold her close, close enough to give her strength. There were many more people who disliked Jenny not just Bette.
This is so powerful and realistic. I stop breathing while I’m reading. I’m caught up in the moment. What will Tina say or do in response?
Sorry, but I don’t blame Bette one bit. Jenny was unstable and has been all along and didn’t need any encouragement from Bette to go of the deep end (no pun intended). Jenny tempted fate with all of her friends…friends who stood by her even in that awful S3, so whatever she did…accident or suicide was of her own volition. Tina…I will be more than disappointed if she even remotely takes Jenny’s side on this when Bette has been Jenny’s victim. Great job O’Malley…you have caused a lot of strong and varied emotions in all of us!
I Knew wasn’t making a murder confession…but I suspect that she believes that she caused Jenny suicide..Although I don’t believe that it general…A person commits suicide did so on their own account…Life can deal you tough situations and most people just keep moving….sometimes people create their own problems…Bette can be responsible for Jenny actions…
You freaked me out Omalley. I almost went crazy. Love this story! Pls update soon.
Tina should say Bette that there was a line or people who really wanted to kill Jenny. Jenny was sooooo “loved” that even Shane had a reason to end her pitiful life. Bette should be proud that she helped Jenny when it was so easy to let go.
wow that was intense…I thought you were going to make Bette the Killer..PHEW !!! I juct could not take that…Tina she needs you comfort her…Excellent mystery and drama…..great writing
I agree, Tina needs to hold onto Bette and show her love. PPS – I want B&T making up.
Hmmm… this is bad. She’s leaving all that pressure to Tina. Bette is handing her to power to comfort or blame Bette. In a way, she sort of passed the torch/ guilt to her because now Tina has to figure out how to react. So very complicated and intense
Freaked me out with the beginning, I was sure you were going to say B HAD killed Jenny and I was shocked. Tough situation for any couple to deal with.
Wow, Tina needs to hold Bette and comfort her. She shouldn’t allow her to feel responsible for anything that Jenny did. She lashed out at Jenny in anger which is perfectly normal, she didn’t do anything wrong.
”It’s like she just-just wanted to torment me.” – very cool story!
Bette is going to have an emotional breakdown if Tina doesn’t get to her first and comforts her. AWESOME update. Thanks, O’malley.
The only thing Tina needs to do now is hold Bette as tightly as she can and for as long as it takes Bette to understand that she was not responsible for Jenny’s death. Jenny was the only one responsible and any little thing could have sent her over the edge. After all, Jenny stole the film and sent letters and all sorts of stuff to Aaron to make him think it was Tina. I don’t call that love and friendship at all. Bette always seem to make things her fault if something goes wrong and this clearly was not her fault. Jenny was sick and anything could have made her jump in the pool. We never did learn why Nicki was hiding in Bette and Tina’s garden that night. Did we? I thought if anyone killed Jenny it had to have been Nicki. Tina needs to hold Bette and tell her that the death was not her fault until she understands. What an update. Can hardly wait for the next one. Thanks for posting.
Excellent work – writing Jenny’s manipulation and the damage done by it.
Maybe had a moment of clarity and just wanted the pain to stop
Wow…this is the first time, I literally held my breath reading pages 1-3. You had my mind saying…No! No! Not Bette!” Now waiting to exhale with Tina’s response…PPS Omalley…you have me on edge.
Amazing. I didn’t think Bette had the capacity to coldheartedly kill Jenny but rage can be complicit in having us commit acts of passion. Anyone of us, if pushed to a breaking point. Jenny was an unstable adult. Bette knew that and she pushed Jenny to her breaking point. With just the one furious comment, I don’t believe Bette can be blamed for Jenny’s demise. Bette, did after all, grab Jenny to save her. If Bette had continually made comments on many occasions then IMO Bette could be considered involved in Jenny’s death. Similar to that Mom that portrayed herself as a 17 year old boy that sent horrible comments on MySpace or FaceBook to a 16 year old girl who eventually committed suicide. That Mom was found guilty of negligent manslaughter (I don’t know the proper legal terms) b/c she knowingly and repeatedly made the remarks.
Oh Tina just hold Bette and comfort her! She’s hurting so much! Great update and thank you so much. Can’t wait to read the next one! :)
OMG..the internal torment that must have been tearing Bette to pieces? The guilt she must have felt at wanting to protect her family with words that cut through Jenny, like a knife, only to have Jenny complete that task, she was feeling in her mind. Will Tina have the strength to comfort and understand Bette’s torment? You had me on the edge, thinking Bette may have been involved in Jenny’s fall. You wrote this chappy with such pause. I’m breathless waiting to see if Tina pulls away. That would kill Bette. Please post soon and thank you for writing this storyline. It’s excellent. :p
That was just so tense… and just sad, really. Guilt’s a horrible thing to live with. But if Jenny committed suicide, that’s not something you can push someone to, that’s a conscious choice, made by the person choosing to end their own life. And I’m sure Bette’s sorry she shook her, but losing her temper, and saying those things, just the once, didn’t cause Jenny’s death. I need more, and soon, please. Thanks for the post.
Jenny wasn’t sane! Bette is innocent ethically. I hope, Tina will stand up for her. :o)