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Breathe– Chapter 32 (Finally)
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Tina bit her lower lip and finally nodded. “I think so,” she said, hesitating ever so slightly. “You have been so loving,” she started slowly, “so honest about your feelings for me from the very beginning.”
Tina paused trying to gather her thoughts. “Bette, I just need to work through some of my past on my own. I don’t think there’s anything more you can do to settle my fears. I just need to let go and believe.”
She leaned in to kiss Bette, and the gentle touch of their lips sent a charge through them both. “Did you feel that?” Bette asked shaking slightly and breathless from the brief contact. Unable to speak the beautiful blonde just nodded.
Bette paused, knowing she was standing on the edge of something remarkable. Knowing that if she had the strength to press forward her life would be forever changed. She had let love lead her once, and she was left broken and alone. But, before the sadness, before the heartache, before the loss, she had been filled with more joy than she ever thought possible.
Maybe it was inevitable. Maybe it was nature’s way of balancing the past with the present. But as her love for Tina grew, memories of life with Bobbie flooded her.
But, for the first time in a long time, it was memories of their life and not her death; memories of their love and not Bette’s loss; and memories of all they had been, rather than what they would never be.
And, as she sat in the darkness watching the second love of her life sleep, she said goodbye to her first. Tears silently fell from her lashes, as she thanked Bobbie for teaching her how to love. She apologized one last time for not keeping her safe, and then she let go.
She let go of the anger, the resentment, and the bitterness she had carried for so long. She let go of the guilt that had been her constant companion, and she let go of the unspoken need to live her life as almost a shrine to Bobbie’s legacy.
She would always love Bobbie, but as she watched Tina sleeping in the moonlight Bette realized it was time for her to rejoin the living. It was time to love and be loved by more than a haunting memory. It was time to allow herself to live even though Bobbie had died, and it was time to leave the past behind and commit to the future.
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Glad to see you’re back and thanks for a great update. Things are slowly falling into place and I’m looking forward to the next chapter!
I hope you get better soon and this was great!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well worth the wait Sox. So the chapter is full of clues….I caught one or two…off to read it again. Glad to hear you are feeling better.
Am sorry to hear about your accident. I hope Whistler emergency room treated you well. Awsome story line, keeping me on the verge of suspense and can’t wait to see your next posting. Worth the wait for sure.
Well Sox I am so glad your back.. I hope you start to feel better soon, I know how it is because I also got in a motorcycle accident and broke my hip and clavical it sucked and it hurt like hell. I PROMISE IT DOES GET BETTER..PHYSICAL THERAPY HER YOU COME…THANK FOR THE GREAT CHAPTER, AND I READ THIS CHAPTER TWICE ALREADY AND I STILL CAN’T FIND THE CLUE.UGHH..KEEP IN TOUCH..
Wonderful As Always Thanks for writing back I Love it Please continue post soon Thanks
I hope you are back on your feet soon.
Well worth the wait that was intense and beautiful.
Thank you.
Sorry about your accident. Hope you are gettimg better each day. This was worth the wait. It keep getting better and better. thanks
Tough when gravity, inanimate objects and an ATV all play a part in disrupting our lives, isn’t it!? Glad to hear that you are on the mend. LOL at the Jimi Hendrix comment. Good one.
I liked the reference that Bette covets Tina in both lightness and shadows. I also thought it was very appropo that she was naked, stripping herself bare when she let go of the past. Almost a cleansing of sorts.
Is Bette’s waiting in the shadows maybe a sign of things to come from the killer? Will he be waiting for Tina as well? Same thing with the ‘I’ll always find you’…is he going to end up penetrating the security around her and kidnap her? There are so many ways for you to jump with this story, I am making myself crazy trying to second guess you.
It’s nice to see that Bette was able to allow her love from the past to fortify her need for a future with Tina. It’s so difficult to remember the good when it was ended so abruptly with something a horrific as Bobbie’s death.
Until Bette truly let go, both she and Tina were competing with a ghost. Now they can move forward unfettered.
Very tender interlude between them. Of course Tina would think it was Bobbie’s ring, so much history there. The romance, the sweetness the overwhelming emotion that was tied to how Bette gave Tina the ring was simply beautiful.
The Butcher. Unfortunately, giving him a name such as that will only give him credibility – he shouldn’t be rewarded with a moniker that will only serve to feed his ego. But again, that’s what we do…we sensationalize that which we find the most horrific. Not only because it sells newspapers and magazines, but because without that we have a much harder time coming to terms with crimes of that nature.
I’m getting the feeling that Judy may have used some of Bette’s “off the record” comments in her article. I’d hate to be Judy if she did. Bette will make PMS look like a walk in the park, if that’s the case.
I so enjoy this story. I read it with such fervor that it’s like Evelyn Wood on speed. Thank goodness I can go back – several times. Your abililty to steep so much into one action, one word or one thought keeps me on the edge of my seat. Enthralled, intrigued and engrossed are not even worthy enough to be considered for how it makes me feel, but I am at a loss for any others.
Bring it on, girl…bring it on!
Sorry about your accident you have been missed! Great chapter.
Sorry to hear about your accident. Good to hear your on the mend.
OK. I thinks I’ve spotted a clue I ‘ave – we’ll see!
The shit must be hitting the fan if a reporter wants to talk off the record.
I do try to get the clues but it’s too much hard work for somebody with an IQ of 42 – or is that the answer to everything – sorry off at a tangent there, it must be the meds. I’m along for the ride and waiting to see if Bette and Tina have really found true lurve(no I am romantic, I really do believe in loov at first sight – no – REALLY interdependance is a good thing it works all the time). I’m also waiting for Bette to singlehandedly rescue Tina who foolishly goes against everything Bette tells her and is lured into mortal danger by Mr S Killer. I know that won’t happen for a few chapters yet – I’m thinking ahead.
Definately worth the wait!!! Hope you’re feeling better. Don’t over do yourself, but post whenever you feel up to it! (smile) Just love that, through all the madness, investigation, a mocking killer, pressure from the higher ups, the media, B/T are able to find some peace and stability in each other’s presence.
We missed this story so much! Sorry to hear about the accident and I hope you are feeling better. OUCH! Thanks again for the wonderful chapter and you post whenever you feel like it.
utterly mind blowing – can’t wait for the next chapter. thanx so much
So sorry for your condition :( recover well. The intense emotion you write with is addicting. That was one of the most romantic proposals I have ever read.. it was amazing.
Rest and take your time :)
hey sox we now have something in common. I have been to the whislter er too, lets just say I’m not a good snowboarder. picked me up some clues also. Love bette watching from the shadows, that was brillant.
Sox , missed you like crazy both the story and you on the board. This chapter is awesome and doubly so since you are still in early recovery from your accident. So sorry your fun ended in such a painful way.
I don’t know if I’m getting your clues or not but I am digging your mystery voice and even the spooky tone at times, but you are the super romantic of all times. Absolutely loved the letting go images for Bette and grandma’s ring and words. You are a master – I so love that you were lured to the boards to weave your magic for us. Welcome home.
Sox1,
First, so sorry to hear about your accident, but glad to know you are on your way to recovery. Note: Adhere to your P.T. religiously, or you will not heal properly. (Believe me I know – I’ve had 11 different bones broken.) The P.T. is painful, but worth it if you do it as instructed.)
Second, I must tell you that I have been enthralled with your story since the beginning, and I will patiently wait as long as it takes for the continuation. Please, just don’t stop!! Your exquisite attention to each and every detail is so masterfully done. I love this story, and I hope and pray that it has a good ending. They have both had such hard living to bear up to this point, they both deserve to have happiness in the end.
Take good care of yourself, and be patient with your body as it is healing – especially your ribs – they may not be screaming the loudest, but I’ll bet they scream the longest.
What a way to end a holiday! Pleased to hear you’re mending, hope you’re back to full fitness quickly. I’ve already said how incredible I think this story is and it just keeps getting better. If I was a publisher,I’d have snapped it up already. Look forward to your story unfolding. Thank you so much
What was up now!
been awhile-worth the wait-hope u post soon
Well it was worth the wait Sox……..great chapter
sorry about your accident – hope that you are feeling much better. BTW Your story is great… take care
been a while since update,but glad you did. hope you are healing well! :) take care!
Yes, it has been a while, but well worth the wait. Thanks Sox for another breath taking chapter. Cant wait for the next one.
On another note ~ Hope you are doing much better after your big adventure.
This is so suspenseful. Thanks for the post and I hope you’re feeling better. Kiitos!
WELCOME BACK SOX. YOU HAVE BEEN MISSED. A LOT. I AM SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR ACCIDENT, BUT I AM PLEASED TO HEAR THAT YOU ARE RECOVERING.
IT WAS SOOOOOOOO WORTH THE WAIT.
Glad to hear you’re healing, but now you’re killing us! Boy, am I going to feel stupid when reading your next chapters because I’m not seeing any clues-yet. Nice job.
That must have been one hell of a ride! I am so sorry your vacation had to end on such a sour note. Hope you are doing better. Now, on to this chapter. You had me worried for a moment. I kept thinking how eerie this is that Bette was sitting in the shadows, not letting Tina know she is there and then asking her to disrobe the way she did. I had this flash of OMG NO!….is Bette the Butcher! Then it got better as I finished reading the chapter. I must admit, I can’t seem to pick up on the “hidden clues”. Glad you are back, get better soon.
Sorry to hear about your accident, but glad to hear you are on the mend.
Very intense between B&T, but a necessary mending for each of them, too.
What’s up with this reporter?? You always keep us guessing. Well done!
sox baby. b&tf and i are in your fair city. we went to the wild rose last night. were on our way to vancouver as soon as we finish all the stories posted last night. well be back saturday. truly what a beautiful place.
that was a beautiful chapt. i had tears in my eyes and a song in my heart hee hee. what will judy say. hmmm. glad to know our injuries didnt affect your moving and spot on words and emotions in this beautiful and gut wrenching story.
hey Sox glad you are back. sorry to hear about your mishap. hope your all better soon. take care. love your story
Like a moth to a flame… So thrilled was I to see your story today, and was it ever a worthwhile wait. I am so sorry for your painful skeletal injuries. I hope you will heal well and quickly. Thank you for writing this story it is truly gorgeous. I per usual will be somewhat obsessively waiting for what our proverbial whistleblower Judy has to share with our mouthwatering detective Bette. BTW, I was once “truth” and now I’m simply “ensconsed”, just a bit more homage to B&T… looking forward to the next. (Your Story Rox, Sox)
I just got caught up on this story and love it. It is great how Bette colleagues have grown to respect her and Tuna’s relationship. This case has opened more than a few eyes and changed perspectives. This was a lovely chapter, please continue and don’t be a stranger. Where is Baily? I miss him and so does Tina.
Glad you’re alive and being taken care of. I hope you have a speedy recovery.
And, as always, still totally loving your story.
Sorry for the late comment, I must’ve missed your post….good thing I checked back….Anyway, great chapter. I love that they were able to get rid of their baggage it must be a relief, however I can’t seem to pick up your clues which is not too unusual as I am still stumped by “Law and Order” every time…guess I’m just really gullible….as is the case I would love some insight on these “clues” or any underlying messages I may have missed. Glad to have you back and good luck on a speedy recovery.