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    Butterscotch Sundae

    Story written on November 13, 2005 by Ms Brightside.
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    69 votes, average: 3.25 out of 569 votes, average: 3.25 out of 569 votes, average: 3.25 out of 569 votes, average: 3.25 out of 569 votes, average: 3.25 out of 5 (69 votes, average: 3.25 out of 5)
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    Number of Comments: 10
    Words: 2797
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=57631
    Author Notes:

    Written after Lacuna- Shane and Carmen- post-lovescene…what I think the morning after would be like.

    We bent and swayed and melted like molten lava last night; liquid fire burning without stopping. She said things I don?t even think she was aware of and I could barely respond. But after each time we rode out waves of bliss she held me close, nurturing me, keeping me near, and reaffirming that she loved me. She said it more than I?ve ever heard it, and I knew she was making up for the times she wanted to say it, when those pesky little voices in her head and heart, were holding her back. The first few times I was silent, unsure if I was willing to open myself up for her again, but soon I was following suit, sputtering out my feelings freely.

    Shane rarely speaks, I notice this; everyone around her notices this. She is more observant than a chemist and much more precise too. It?s almost like she formulates what she?s going to say before saying it, something I certainly do not posses. The thinking before speaking aspect is still premature in my brain. Sometimes this comes to my advantage, supposedly living up to my Latina reputation as brassy and loud, but most of the time it just hurts me, and hurts the ones around me.

    I cannot resist her anymore, and I have no reason to. I lean forward and kiss her, feel her arms tighten their hold around me. I scoot closer to her and she sighs, pulling away to nuzzle the skin beneath my jaw bone. I once could recall its proper name, but now only Shane is registering in my mind. I trace my hand over the spot on her bare chest where there is that bleak, slightly puffy scar. It?s fitting of her, and I look to her again. She clears her throat. I?m probably making her uncomfortable, but I feel I need an explanation. I?m not a pushy girl, but I like to be informed, and I like to be totally aware of what?s going on.

     ?I was a teenager, around seventeen I guess. I was running away from someone.? She stops and swallows and she licks her lips. This is vague, but it?s a start. ?I was climbing down a fence, you know the normal, chainware kind, and I thought I was home free until I caught my shirt on one of the points.?

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    Comments

    3. Gorgeous! I love the way you linger on physical details in a way that gives them their due, painting the picture, showing and not telling, but without cliche. I especially like your depiction of Shane and her fragility, that was lovely. More! :D

    5. I must agree wholeheartedly with NOVEMBER. I planned on reading all night till work because I couldn’t sleep but you’ve ruined that for me. BEcause I always have to stop on a good note so I will have to find something else to do for 5 hours…I’m not joking. You’ve left me speechless and afraid to pick my pen back up and start writing which i had planned for this week. With one line you’ve shattered my writting aspirations. …”My sweet catastrophe” I could never top that…hat off to you man and keep them coming I’m hooked.

    6. MAGNIFICENT.This is a fic that I enjoyed from start to finish. I love it that you chose Carmen to be the narrator of the story. Does it mean the fic is over?:( PLEASE RECONSIDER:)I’ll buy you flowers:)

    9. I’m smiling and I can’t stop! Beautifully written, the way you got Carmen’s thoughts down just nothin short of awesome. Please post another fic soon!

    10. Its BeaUtifuLL !! i love it!! haih, can almost picture the whole scene from ur descriptions. totally different writing style from the other writers i have read in here, before this.

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