My Turn

Chapter Nine



When Alice and Shane arrived Bette was way back in a booth sitting so quietly.

Man you call this out of control, Id hate to see what he calls wild.

Al come on,

Right. Bette had seen them only to close her eyes. In a broken whisper,

Just go away.

No,

Please.

Why?

I hear the words and I can see behind all of your eyes. I know because I see it every time I look at you, as she pointed to Alice, and you, as she pointed to Shane.

Dammit Bette. Lets go now.

I dont want to go anywhere, be anybody without

I think this might be a little harder than we thought Shane.

Yeah, do you think we should call her? Then cut off by Bette standing up and saying,

No, take me home.

Good idea, Kits waiting for you.

No I said take me home now.

Bette you know

I dont care anymore what I know or who knows what, my house, my home, my wife NOW.

Ill call her and tell her we are on our way.



Tina I dont know how to say this, but she wants her home now and Im scared if we dont take her there you know.

Shane.

I know T, but she doesnt want to go anywhere else. Look let us just get her into bed, shell knock out, then we can camp out.

Tina knowing she should do that didnt want to. Though she might not be thinking straight, she wanted this one moment alone with Bette.

Fine just bring her.


Alice and Shane were waiting for Tina to unlock the door as Bette just stood at the end of the porch.

What the ***** are you doing?

Im taking a minute.

For what?

I dont know, then Tina opened the door and at opposite ends, they just stood. Bette broke the stare when she turned away to clear her eyes. Wiping them away did no good cause they were still coming. Tina just walked back into her house and let Shane and Alice follow behind her.

T, we could stay. No problem you know.

I think that we need this time alone.

Right, but no taking advantage.

Alice.

Yeah I know. Then she walked in. First she stood, looked around, then walked over to the counters. No pictures of them, no vases of flowers she had brought home for her, no books or anything else about Bette. She touched each empty place that was once hers, but the one that hurt the most was the now empty heart she once filled.

Alice broke the awkward silence, all right, we are just on our way out. Goodnight.

Alice,

Yeah, Bette.

Will you give me a ride?

What? To where?

Doesnt matter.

I thought

Yeah I thought wrong.

Tina spoke up, Bette you can stay here, I dont think you should do anything except rest.

Why here?

MaybeAlice words went unheard so she and Shane stepped aside.

Youre the one that wanted to come here.

Because I wanted to, I needed to.

And now?

You dont want me to, or need me to.

But you can stay, its already late.

How can I sleep if I cant hold you while you dream? How can I close my eyes knowing those dreams dont involve me? If your heart isnt close to mine, I cant do anything.

Just go to bed the guestroom is fine.

I dont want that bed.

I dont care want you want, that bed will do.

I dont want that bed.

Bette, dont do this, just go to bed.

Dont do what, walking over to where she was only to be inches apart, I cant miss my wife. I cant miss our bed. I cant miss her loving me?

You should of thought

Dont you dare finish that sentence Tina!

Why, its the truth you should have thought of that before you went and fucked her Bette.

Bette closed her eyes but she knew she was right.

Im sor

Dont T, reaching out for her hands and letting her tears fall,

I deserved that, I deserved you getting on, you not by my side. I can never take away what I did, and I can never stop loving you. I cant even try to stop.

Tina tried to pull away but she only held on tighter.

Please let me finish. Until the day I stop breathing, I will always be sorry and have regret for what I did. But most of all I will have regret for even thinking or having doubts about me falling out of love with you. Just thinking them was enough to kill me and I tried to forget that those thoughts ever existed. Then I looked at you and knew I could never fall out of love. I could never want more than what you had given me. Those thoughts left me but they then fell in between us and it just went down from there. I hate me for doing this to you. I hate that I wouldnt come to you, I was a fool Tina and Im an even bigger fool now that you are not mine.

But in this moment and in the end, know that I love you with all that I could have been. Bette then grabbed her left hand and kissed the place where she had once placed her ring and walked out once again.