ALICE:  Gotta get back to cleaning.  This is really tough.  I had to cut that tension.  Man!  Why am I feeling like this?  I feel like Im going to die if I cant be with Dana.  This is hurting so much.  I really fucked up.   But, I had to tell her how I felt.  I had to stop her from marrying Tonya.  What were you thinking?  Just show her how you feel and not expect tension?  It was so unexpected.  I didnt plan it.  I just wanted to tell her not to marry Tonya.  I didnt mean for this to happen, but when I went to confront her, something came over me.  Have I been feeling like this all along?  I mean we totally agreed not to sleep with each other.  But, why now?  What triggered me to cross the line?  The fear of her marrying Tonya because I know shes so wrong for Dana.  My Dana.  The person I could not imagine living this crazy life without.  The one who puts up with me and who confides and trusts ME.  She makes me feel needed.  Like I totally matter.  Shes so innocent.  I almost feel like I have to protect her.  Shes so Dana.  I love her so much and I couldnt imagine myself letting her get into this marriage.  But, I put myself out there.  I kissed her and confused her.  She must be torn.  I mean I know she doesnt want to hurt me.  Is she just repaying me for being there for her?  Maybe she feels that she has to respond and maybe its her way of comforting me because she thinks Im confused?  Does she think that Im doing this just to keep her away from Tonya?  Am I being selfish because I want Dana for myself?  I just had to throw myself in the mix so that Tonya couldnt take her away from me.  Good one, Al.  Is it really to keep her from marrying Tonya?  I never expected to make her choose.  Gosh, Im really bad.  We cant be.  Its such a risk.  I cannot lose Dana and if we tried to be together and we didnt work out, man I wouldnt know what to do with myself.  Ive grown attached to her being around, and now Ive risked our friendship.  What am I going to do?  We cant be.  We just cant.  I will not lose her.