“Babe …Don’t do this to me, please… ”  I told her while I finally faced her and my hands embraced her upper arms.

“You would ever know, Bette… how…HOW… I lived without you… I tried so hard…I called you. Every day, many times a day, for three months. Messages, letters, texts. And when that woman answered the cell phone, I also left you messages. I emailed you…And not a word. Not a word after our trip to Mexico.”

She looked me straight in the eyes.

“Yes, I was there ….Bette… with you. But I don´t know what happened…You’d called me and I met you there. It was and would be forever this simple: you would call me and I would go. I would go wherever you want. For your love. For the opportunity to be with you…”

I´ve had to stop to gain some air.

“The sun, the beach, your skin…Those days you belonged exclusively to me… I was intoxicated with happiness…”

I´ve had to close my eyes to contain the delight from those memories.

“But when I heard you arguing you’re your wife over the cell phone… I couldn´t help myself. Bette, I couldn’t see you depart again. I´ve had to leave before you woke up. That´s why I…I don´t know what happened, babe…But…But… anyway … God…It was my fault…if I was not a coward…”

I sobbed hard and her arm pulled me closer. Her hand heated the small of my back, giving me the right balance, telling me everything was fine .She consoled me and It was so good to feel her body closer again. The warm of her skin…

“Babe… you would ever know how was to live without any news from you, but surrounded by the news about you. After three months I waited a gift, a letter, a text message, anything… I kept the same cell number… I always let my new addresses with the old lady that rented the apartment to me and Alice when we´re at the university, I kept the same e-mail….everything in case you appear… But…”

I felt the rush of pain invaded me again.

“You never came or called, Bette.”