Fan Fiction
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Chandelier – 21
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She could get used to waking up to this.
In fact, most of the weekend was something she could get used to.
Talking to Tina until dawn of Saturday. Hanging out with Angelica,
dinner with Tina and the babysitter. In fact, after their little
interlude last night regarding the photograph, and Angelica had fallen
asleep, it was only when Tina admitted to being exhausted that Bette
realized the lateness of the hour. But she didn’t leave, and Tina
didn’t let her, either. A brief and pointless debate on safety and
weekend custody ended with Bette agreeing to spend the night. She’d
cajoled Tina into sharing the bed, but that didn’t really work. Even if
it had, Bette had fallen asleep before Tina did.
“You two should get going,” Tina said quietly.
“Getting rid of us already?” Bette teased, grinning at Tina.
Tina looked up at them, smiling weakly. “People might be looking for you.”
Bette hesitated, studying Tina’s expression, and coming to a conclusion. “I’ve done something wrong.”
“What?” Tina asked quickly. “No.”
“Really, because your face says something else.”
Tina sighed. “I’m just… Being wrong. Being the villain in this piece.
It puts me on the defensive. Everything, every tiny thing, is like an
attack, and, you know, I don’t need it.”
“T, if I said something wrong–”
“No, you didn’t!” Tina assured her. “That’s just it. I know you didn’t,
and I’m just taking it the wrong way, but the easiest thing for me is
to think you meant it.”
“Why would I do that?”
Tina sighed, then offered Bette a weak smile. “Because I would.”
“I’m clearly not you.”
“Yes. And thank God for small blessings, but the point is, things are
going to be said. We can be serious about it, or make it a joke, but
we’re going to inevitably say the wrong thing. And the last thing I
want is for you to think I’m saying it to hurt you.”
Bette held Angelica firmly in front of her. “Why are you telling me this?”
“Well, mostly because I want that to be clear between us.”
“Really.”
“Yes.”
“Because I can’t help the feeling that you’re saying it to help ease your own conscience.”
“Yes.”
“What?”
“That’s true.”
Bette frowned. “You really suck at this, don’t you?”
“What?”
“Confrontation.”
Tina smiled wryly. “So true.”
“So,” Bette placed Angelica on her legs, “you want to be clear that
you’re going to try not to be verbally vindictive, at the same time
easing your own conscience that you’re going to be doing it anyway?”
Tina considered that statement, then nodded. “Yes.”
“I’m awash in a sea of confusion.”
“I know,” Tina sighed, and smiled at Bette. “You’re better than me. I
get that. In our current situation, that’s where we are. You’re better.
And a part of me still believes that you’re not supposed to be. And
that part’s going to have a lot of things to say. I will rehash your
one mistake to justify each one of mine. I want you to know, now, that
I don’t want to be that person. When I say I forgive you for cheating,
I want that to be true.”
“But it’s not.”
“Yes, it is.” Tina said quietly.
“But,” Bette pressed.
“But that makes me weak.” Tina admitted softly.
Angelica clapped her hands together, breaking the rising tension between her two mothers.
Bette let Angelica go, and watched as the girl crawled back to Tina,
standing up and placing both her hands on either side of Tina’s face.
“Mama,” Angelica grinned.
“Why weak?” Bette asked, not dropping the issue.
Tina glanced at her, as Angelica sat on her lap, facing Bette. “I wasn’t supposed to go back to you.”
“Why not?”
“What person gets cheated on, and comes back?” Tina asked. “How weak am
I, to leave you and date someone else, then end up again depending on
you and loving you again?”
“But you did.”
Tina sighed, running her hand over Angelica’s hair. “And now you’re doing it.”
“Yes, but there’s a difference.”
“How?”
“Loving you doesn’t make me weak, T.” Bette leaned forward, smiling at
both the adult and child versions of her heart. “And I’m gonna prove to
you that the reciprocal isn’t any less true.”
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TD, Words can be such an inadequate way of saying how much you were missed but rest assured that you were and now the heavens are bright again as you have returned. As for the story, I love the way that your interplays between Bette and Tina are so realistic. Both gals have been hurt in the past but are now cautiously moving towards each other. There is still the past actions to resolve and finally lay to rest but their determination to rebuild and reunite is strong as their passion for one another continue to grow and mature. The dialogue is dizzingly delightful and demonstrative of how they each feel. More please, real soon. Thank you ever so much for this remarkable tale. Your Loyal Fan.
Gee, T.D., I rather think people missed you and are glad to see you back. I am among them. Is it just me, or did Tina seem a might ambivalent in that chapter?
glad ur back!!
Thanks for the great chapter. I like how Tina is being honest and realistic. I can understand how she would feel weak, but now it is up to Bette to prove the opposite. Looking forward to your next post.
So glad to see a new chapter from you.It’s not necessarily weak to take your partner back after cheating – depends how the partner behaves from that point on. The weak part comes in when you bring some man to your house and…yeah.
Hope your time away went well. Thanks for this post!
Yaym TD is back!!! I’ve missed you. It really does seem that Bette is in a better place than Tina, at least psychologically. She is able to admit that “Loving you doesn’t make me weak” whereas Tina thinks the opposite. Have I told you that I love the way you write B&T’s dialog? Very succinct dialog and yet conveys so much with those words. Thanks for posting and looking forward to more.
I needed this tonight. About a week ago I went back and read this story from the beginning. It made me realize that if you really love someone then you have to work as hard as you can to gain that trust back. Both Bette and Tina have screwed up. In most people’s eyes neither one of them should have been forgiven. But sometimes when you know that you belong with the other person you just have to do things that the normal person would never do. In this case both Bette and Tina have to claw their way back into each other’s heart and soul. This is the way that season 4 should be like. It has drama, love and most of all Bette and Tina reconnecting. Can’t forget about an adorable Angelica.
So glad you are back. So you like to work in 5’s or 10’s? How about 500 or 555 or 1000? :)
i’ve missed you. thanks for another lovely chapter :)
hey tif: im glad thAT youre back even if its not daily.just keep up the great writing as usal.please post soon!
WOW last night I was on the crapper and was like, where’s TD? Nnot that I am likening you or your work to crap but, I was hoping that all was well. Then I thought maybe she’s on a little break. Hope it was the latter. Girl I’ve missed your writing…seems like everytime I read a chapter over, I take away a little more. Only a really good writer can do that. You’ve brought BnT to a reality level that is unprecidented. Nothing that you right is a stretch of the imagination. Keep it up….and I do hope this is a group of 10! :)
so nice to see a post from you…story is great…that chapter too short. post soon..please?
Tiff!! I am so HAPPY you’re back! I was wondering where you had gone to…or worse that you decided to stop writing. Gload to know you’re well, were just away and busy! Thank you, and please post soon.
*does a happy dance* Weeeeeeeeeeee! Cute beginning to the chapter. lol
I’ve counted the days my dear, and now you’re back. Thanks for that. Great chapter btw.
YOU!!!!!!!!!! You just made my day! “Loving you doesn’t make me weak, T.” Great to see you back. we´ll be here waiting for you to post, no matter how much time you take. A loyal fan :)
how true, how true, how true…tks!!
*Running around the room hollering* TD is baaaaack.. TD is back.. *comes back to little lappy, reads the chapter with a huge grin*.. Awww the beginning was so cute.. and I totally loved the ending, I say BOOO to the non believers.. (which includes me on some occasions).. LOL..
i sure missed this wonderful story…thanks for bringing it back…this is so amazing…the dialogs are perfection
So glad you are back… : )
Your back! :-)
Increments of five, reciprocals…I am impressed, you can do numbers and write incredibly beautiful stories. I look forward to more soon. Maybe Bette and Tina can do some trigonometry together. Sometimes relationships feel like a really hard math problem. I hope at least one of them stayed awake during math class. Sounds like maybe Bette did.
Good to see you back Tiff and this is good chapter!
woohoo~ t_d is back..sure is a looOOong wait!thx..i will be lookin forward for updates.
So happy to see you back. Your dialogue gets better and better with each chapter. Thanks!
Awwww this chapter was such a massive step forward. Finally really honestly talking about things. I love Tina being upfront here:
“You’re better than me. I
get that. In our current situation, that’s where we are. You’re better.
And a part of me still believes that you’re not supposed to be. And
that part’s going to have a lot of things to say. I will rehash your
one mistake to justify each one of mine. I want you to know, now, that
I don’t want to be that person. When I say I forgive you for cheating,
I want that to be true.”