Carmen looked down at Shane. There was panic and concern in her eyes. The Notebook was sad, but the look on Shane’s face made her yearn for something more. She had held her face in her palms like it was something precious and fragile. It almost made her want to believe something she shouldn’t and she couldn’t help but cry harder. “Shit, Carmen….” Shane looked around and frantically grabbed a box of tissues and held it out to Carmen. “I’m sorry, the movie was so sad, something about it just reminded me of my mum and dad…”

“I knew the chick flick was a bad idea,” she mumbled as she rubbed away her tears with the pad of her thumb. Shane put her arms around Carmen and hauled her close. She could feel Shane’s breasts pressed against her back through her shirt. “Shane, I’m okay…you don’t have to……” Before she could continue, she started hiccupping. Shane laughed. “I hiccup when I cry, it’s like a childhood thing,” Carmen said in a defensive tone and tried to pull away from Shane. “kay kay, I’m not saying anything,” She placed her hand on the top of her head and tucked it beneath her chin. They were on the couch, Carmen on top of Shane and Carmen could feel the rising and falling of Shane’s chest underneath her own. She could feel her lean arms around her, her hands splayed across her back. She didn’t know how long she laid there. All she knew was that she felt safe. She allowed this sense of being protected to wash over her before she finally succumbed to sweet oblivion.
 

Chapter 11

Jenny got home and she was greeted by the sight of Shane cradling Carmen in her arms, lying on top of the couch. Shane placed her forefinger over her lip and she realised Carmen was deep asleep. She looked at the tissues strewn on the floor. “What happened?” she mouthed. “The Notebook happened,” Jenny placed a hand over her mouth to stifle a laugh. “How long have you been like this?” “I don’t know, half an hour?” Shane looked down at Carmen and Jenny wondered if she knew how loving and tender her gaze was. “I thought that she needed a good sleep after crying, oh shit, I can’t feel my legs,” “Carm? Carm….I need to go to pee,”

Carmen opened her eyes and she saw Jenny, looking like a wide-eyed audience. What happened? She spun her head around and her head connected with something hard. “Owwwhhh…” she heard Shane and herself both groaning in unison. She saw Shane pressing her hand to the bottom of her jaw and she pressed her hand to her own head. “Are you okay? I’m sorry,” Carmen peeled Shane’s hands away and looked at the spot where she was nursing. “I’m fine but erm…..Carmen I need to pee,” “Oh….” Carmen had no idea how long she had laid there but it must have been long. She felt her face heat up. She got up and made a pretense of dusting off her pants. Shane was wincing as she massaged her numb legs. “I should get going,” Carmen said as she hurriedly took her bag. “Yeah bye Carmen….” With that, Shane hobbled to the toilet.

When Shane came out of the toilet, she saw Carmen sitting alone on the couch. “Carmen, you’re still here?”
“Yeah….I have something to ask you,”
Shane made her way to the couch with mild apprehension. Some part of her had been expecting this. Carmen wasn’t exactly one to hide her feelings and she had found that forthrightness endearing right from the start. “Do you think this friends thing between us is working?”
Shane slouched down into the couch. “No…in fact it is a bad idea,” Shane said with rare candour. “You’re the one who came up with that,” Carmen said softly.

Shane sighed and rubbed her forehead with her hands. “Yeah I know that…you want the truth Carmen? I can’t get you out of my system okay? It’s not like me…this is not me. It’s a big step for me Carm….and I need time..”
“Okay……I’m going Shane,” Her voice was a mere whisper and Shane could hear the disappointment she couldn’t quite hide.
Shane stood up. “Wait…do you want me to send you home?”
“No Its okay..I’ll go home myself," Carmen reached for the doorknob and stopped. “Shane….if you think I’m gonna sit around and wait for you to come to terms to what’s between us, then perhaps you’re wrong…Goodnight,”