Alice looked at her watch, surveyed the gridlock in front of her and pounded the steering wheel in frustration. "Fuck, fuck and double fuck!" She yelled, and blew out an exasperated breath. Noticing the movement of bangs from her sigh, she muttered, "I wish Shane would come back so I could get a trim."

Laughing bitterly she shook her head and glared at the five year old who was staring at her from the car sitting in the lane next to her. She rolled the window down and stuck her tongue out for good measure. "Enjoy it while you can, kid! One day you’re being driven around by your mom, licking a popsicle and watching "Blue’s Clues" in your suburban gas guzzler, and the next thing you know you’re all grown up with no one to take care of you, stuck in traffic without coffee and running so late you’ll never make it to the station in time to show your boss, whose worried you might say something ca-rrazy, your script—which means you may not make it on air at all and be forced to listen to painful re-broadcasts of Joey D’s midnight show, while writing three days worth of airtime in a stuffy cubicle as your penance." As Alice wound down the child regarded her solemnly for a moment before his lip quivered. He then screwed his face into a painful contortion and let out a high pitched squeal, which Alice could hear despite his window being raised. Pointing at Alice, he declared to his mother, who’d twisted around in alarm, "Mommy the mean lady is making faces and yelling at me!" The driver peered at Alice, who suddenly seemed really interested in something lodged on the dashboard, while frantically pushing the automatic window button.

"Great, Pieszecki! Torturing little kids. What’s next? Kicking defenseless puppies? Clubbing baby seals? Stealing a gay man’s Prada?" She looked at the traffic once more and pulled out her cell phone. Punching a number, she held the phone to her ear and turned her side to the mother who was motioning for Alice to roll her window down as her son wailed uncontrollably in the back seat.

"Bette? It’s me."

"Alice, where are you? I’ve been waiting for thirty minutes."