hey ba.Alice, wanna meet for lunch later? Think I can take some time off. How about it? Bette was adjusting to singlehood rather well. Its been 2 weeks since she and alice had broken up. Yet, they felt that they were closer than ever. They see each other more, are able to converse more easily. Oh my, alice had been a best friend all along, how blind she was to take her on as a lover.

nopes, *****. Ehehe, I meant CANT! I just love play on words! Dont you? Gotta get the lame interview with that Fairbanks *****. Grrrspoilt brats like her always make me lose my appetite. Meet up at Francs later? I hear shes back, and bought some caf on west Hollywood for marina. Marina? U know, the hot exotic chick..yeaI dont think its a fling, Fran told me they were pretty seriousoh welltalk to ya later! Gotta whack some balls at the club! alice flipped her phone shut. Damn, she so needed a new car. Either that, or she needed a highway all to herself.

what the *****? Do I look like a freaking nun-on-wheels? Why are there accidents whenever Im driving?? Just scoop that ***** cat off the road and move on people! Stop slowing down to stare, what? Youve never seen a cat get run over before? *HOOOOOONNNNKKKKKKKKKK* alice was beyond impatient. She was yet again late to meet this Fairbanks girl. She had better be there for me, one more time this ***** does a disappearing act, Im gonna drop her interview, and put in my much-coveted lip readings.

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alice? Hello? Alice? Urgh! What is Francescas number again?…hmmm bette rummaged through her bag, looking for her old school address book. Her mobile phone was as huge as a walkie talkie, and as useless as a leaky paper cup. It could only store 20 numbers! Thats all! Technology had not yet advanced. Anyhow, she scanned the pagesah! There.

Fran? Youre back!!! Im so glad! Are you and your, erm, friend free for dinner tonight? Just alice and I, no, we broke up, ahaha. Yeaok! At your place? Great! bette smiled. It was lovely being in francescas company, she had a way of accommodating guests to their every need. Bette was just dying to meet her new fling. Alice had once been a one-night stand to Fran, and thats how they came to know her. Hahaha. Alice was a weird woman. Everyone in west Hollywood knew that.

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alice was looking in her rearview mirror, trying to erase her fakest smile from her lips, failing to put on a genuine smile, she gave up. How hard could it be to get some words out of this sports woman? Oh, there might be a problem. Most atheletes could only snort and grunt. Parking her beat-up sedan in the handicapped lot, she wrote a quick note and left it on the dashboard of her car:

Im handicapped you *****, so dont you dare clamp/tow-away/fine me for parking here! My head was bleeding! So ***** off bugger!

satisfied with her short note, she got out, and made her way up the long flight of stairs. She saw ladies everywhere, but there was no sign of a racquet anywhere. Damn, dont tell me that impatient ***** couldnt wait just 5 minutes! Like hello! Im handicapped! All of a sudden, alice spotted someone. Wow, it must have either been her newly earned singledom or that the place was filled with arthritic ladies, but that brunette in the corner had a hot *****! Come on, get up, and face me hot-buns! I need to see your face! Whole package..yea babyOH MY GOD!!!! Racquet! Thats THE Fairbanks girl? Whats her namedamnit! Ok alice, go, go, GO!!!

heyya therethis seat taken? alice grinned.

ermkindasome moronic reporter is supposed to be giving me some sort of interviewAlice Pieszecskiwhere is she? I really have to hit the gym soon, urgh!!! out of frustration, Dana starting tossing her salad with intense fury, oblivious to the greens raining down on alice.

oook, I think its time to give you a re-introduction, Hi!!! Im alice. Heh. Nice to meet you? hand outstretched just a little out-of-reach, alice looked at dana nervously. Turning her attention on the hand, dana looked up, and gave an awkward smile. Silence followed.

right then., shall we get down and dirtyI meant to business? Ok. Ms. Fairbanks, when did u first break into the professional tennis scene..

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Marina, I want you to meet two of my good friends tonight. Whip up something nice will you? Something Parisian perhaps? I love you, you know that, and you owe me for what I helped you with. If not for me, you wouldnt be here today, am I right? Francesca caressed Marinas *****, whilst kissing her softly on the lips.

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thanks for your time Dana, really glad to have met you! I seriously thought u would be some rich-snob sort, but yay! Oh, by the way, wanna go for a drink tomorrow night at Milk? alice smiled, a pleading look came into her eyes.

Milk??? is that some sort of diary farm on the outskirts? Coz really, I dont really like being around cows, their kind of stinky.. Dana stared at a giggling alice. what so funny?

I guess I was wrong. Youre just another straight girl. My mistake! as alice packed up her stuff to leave, feeling immensely embarrassed, dana grabbed her hand, looking up, she saw dana mouth the words, Im game! before disappearing into the sea of white(not only white-clad people, white-clothed, but white-haired as well!)

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hello, how do you do? My name is Marina. Francescas waiting for you inside. Marina greeted bette and alice at the door. How quaint, bette thought. This marina, wow, she was something. Strong features, someone who seemed like she appreciated art as well. But she was Frans property, and bette didnt want to interfere.

Frannie!!!!(only alice could call Francesca this!) its been what, 4 months since u last came home! What wild adventures have you been up to lately? Ooh, marina is marvelous. Tell me the whole story about you two, will you?

right after dinner alice. Dont be in such a hurry. First, you gotta tell me what happened between you two. Weve got so much catching up to do, havent we?

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alice looked up and down the street, there was totally no sign of dana. damn, please dont stand me up! Its Milk, where would I hide my face? Then she saw her. Same athletic body, but! Oh my *****! What the ***** is she wearing? An orange sundress? No way are we going to be seen together, especially since the queue was exceptionally long tonight.

Spotting alice in the distance, dana lifted a hand and started waving excitedly, and tripped over a filthy boot! God, that was embarrassing, damnit Fairbanks, could things get any worse? Looking up, she saw that ***** ***** that made out with her criispay club lady. Damn.

sorry, just missed a step, thats all.ALICE!!!!!

muttering to herself, oh god, someone hide me right nowohheyhi dana alice tried averting danas gaze, as she rushed into the club.

After a couple of drinks, alice felt a little woozy, and started spewing a little rubbish(not that she doesnt talk ***** when shes sober, we all know she does.). looking at a sober dana, she pointed at a scantily dressed blonde at the bar,
wow, shes something, you know, I wouldnt mind packing her home. Hello! Takeout for mehahahaha.ever wonder why they called this place Milk? I mean, its a ***** bar, how many of us could produce milk? Why couldnt they just call this placehmmTits? I mean, that would be great. Imagine telling your friends, hey, I got laid in *****..or ***** is a great place to be when you wanna have some fun.ahahahaman Im soooo drunk alices head lolled from side to side.

Dana sat quietly in her chair, ignoring most of what alice was jabbering,. She was scanning the place. Wow, she had never openly come to a ***** club before. Were all these women really in love with other women? Oh my god, she would never have guessed that some of them were lesbians. I mean, just look at that asian chick over that, she seriously looked like a *****-lover. Her horizons were broadened in one night, all thanks to a crazy drunk journalist.

kiss me dana! kiss me long and hard! If you dont kiss me, Ill puke on your lap! alice looked at her threateningly, well as threateningly as you can look when youre a little more than tipsy. Dana reeled back in shock. What theshe wasnt about to blow her closeted identity on this crazed *****. Looking around for someone to help her out of this situation, she spotted the boot/***** *****. The ***** came over, smiled, and mouthed need help?

yes I do! Can u help me get her outside, while I figure out where she stays. Wheres her damn cell, ah! There it isthanks so much..sorry, I didnt catch your name? one hand scanning alices mobile phonebook, whilst she extended her hand for a handshake.

Shane. Shane McCrutcheon. Cmon, lets get this drunkard outta here. With that, they lugged alice out of the overpopulated place.