Carmen’s eyes were glued to the fire when she spoke, “I thought you were my mother when I glanced out the door.” she finished with an ironic chuckle. This statement caught Tina’s attention, as Carmen continued to bear her thoughts “She bought a blonde wig when the chemo ate her up. I asked her why she chose a blonde wig, she said she was gonna make this chemo sexy.” Carmen said with tears on the border of her laughter. They both sat in their own minds as the fire danced with the wind and kept them company.

“You have to stop worrying about Bette.” she said out of the blue.

“I can’t. It’s something in her voice that telling me that she’s not ok. She’s not doing to well.”

“I know I talked to Toni. She said that Bette was in another world and completely shut out to this one. But you have to believe that she’ll find her way back. If nothing else believe in the love that you two share.” Carmen said as she stared deeply into Tina’s eyes. Tina let out a sigh and rested her head on Carmen’s shoulder as Carmen wrapped her arm around Tina and stroked her arm. “She’ll come back, trust me.”

“I’m trying.”

………………………….

Bette was sitting in the chair by the window, staring into nothing, as her mind ran through each memory with Alicia. Although most were pleasant she couldn’t help but to focus on the ones where she appreciated her friendship the most. Although having Ali as a lover was a bonus, she missed her friend, her confidant, her dance partner, her all around friend the most. It was when they were sitting around after Melito had gone to sleep when they bared their souls to each other. And even though she has that and so much more with Tina, it was something about the first connection she made with Alicia, that made her bond that much stronger. Something in the way it felt so freeing to be able to just be yourself and release your thoughts, fantasies, and opinions to someone and have them actually listen to you. That in it self was a different kind of feeling that was truly appreciated years later.