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Feelings… Chapter 7
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"What the hell!?!?"
"You wanted to fuck that guy when I suggested that you to sleep with him while you were still ovulating! You sure didn’t put up much resistance!"
"Shit, Bette! You know I haven’t–I mean hadn’t–desired anyone but you up to that point. And you know how disgusted I was that Jean-Paul thought he was actually going to sleep with me! And you didn’t “get” why I didn’t think that whole thing was funny when you told the story to the girls at The Planet! I was frankly insulted! First, by him, then, by you!
"Tina, I’m sorry…I really didn’t know that’s how you felt." She sat down, handing a bottle to Tina.
"That seems to be a long-standing problem between us, Bette. How do you think it made me feel that, after a point, I was always the one that initiated sex between us? You got me all hot and bothered one morning when I told you I was ovulating, and then you rushed off to work! That wasn’t the first time, either. For a long time, you wouldn’t have cared if you were late; you would have stuck around to finish what you started!"
"What are you talking about?"
"Bette, you used to make me feel so special, so loved, so desirable. But remember that even Foxworthy picked up on the fact that our sex life was ‘shitty’.”
"I still don’t think he truly understood our situation, Tina! Yeah, he had read all about lesbian bed death and spouted that stuff to try to make us believe he was an expert on the subject! I was so angry with him, I was ready to walk out! Talk about being insulted…"
"Geez, Bette–you are so not getting what this is all about! I didn’t think you wanted me anymore. And when I think back on everything, you had so many reasons to not want me anymore. All you had to do was pick one."
"You’re really going to have to explain that to me! Tina, I never wanted anyone else but you–"
"And that’s precisely the reason you cheated on me, right?" Tina shook her head in disgust. "I don’t know why I even bother, Bette! It’s clear what you wanted then. That…carpenter! You still haven’t answered one question that I asked you before. Was it because she was biracial, too?"
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This was a fasinating chapter!! Truly enjoyed reading your thought process. Thanks!!
i know we hear every thing they are thinking… too bad they just can’t come out and say it… thats the problems the has… tina would tell alice… don’t tell bette… they should of talked more… now they are both just sitting there probably just looking at each other and saying nothing… i would rather see them screaming at each other and getting it all out then just sitting there and eating it… but thats me… love your take on this… please continue
She thought, “I had every right to be upset about Marcus! It had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that he was black! Bette should have told me, that’s all!”Say word. And it ain’t even Christmas yet! A new chapter and a perfectly written dialogue Arr.A million Thanks to you Arr for the above quote. Tina’s reservations towards MA was in part because of how Bette TOLD how about MA.It had nohing to do with Bette’s color. We’ve had numerous discussions regarding this very topic B4, so I won’t go on a tangent again. But Bette should’ve had some Brothas at the partay if she wanted a baby bi-racial baby.Tina wasn’t the only one who dismissed the apparent Convo, bcos obviously B did Too.Where were the Brothas Bette?I don’t blame Tina not one bit for freaking out regarding their baby’s “Otherness,”. That’s all I’m saying. please Post soon.
They need to clear the air between them. Don’t just sit there like a bump on a log and think to themselves. Talk to each other Shout if necessary. Make the other listen to what they are saying Okay you have a wonderful story going thanks
From the end of the last chapter, I thought it was going to get violent!!! This story is so intense that I always have to brace myself for it. I really think Brownie makes an interesting point. I never got the sense that B denotes race as being a big part of who she is. It felt more like she just is….Even if this was not purposeful, undoubtly this is what people saw. The whole thing with MA seemed like an after thought….an added benefit of sorts. Sincerely, I was surprised with Tina…not to mention that he was huge!!! The criteria was creative, handsome and talented or intelligent (I can’t remember exactly which). It appears that there was no mention or major emphasis on race in their family planning discussion. But, hey although we are a bit obsessed, we weren’t with them for evvvvery conversation, huh? As with most relationships, there are so many layers. Thank you for pealing them back.
you are always so good…
Wow…I had so many thoughts about that episode in season 1. They had so many issues going on (But you could still see the love between them that’s why I am a Tibetter) They just need communication like crazy. I think Bette was just happy to have an actual donor who had a background in art first before she thought about a African-American donor…I mean look at all the ones they had been thru…they were duds…and the party they had where they kept getting rejected. I think when Tina questioned the fact that he was black then Bette reminded her about the discussion they had (that Tina didn’t remember). I was a little shocked at her reaction…at the time I saw it I was like why is she with Bette if this is upsetting her so. I know in the future there may be situations that arise with having a mixed child ….but they have issues now…like non-communication. It did make me mad that Tina was always “confiding” EVERYTHING with everyone else but Bette. Bette felt like an outsider. I could keep typing for days but I will wait for the next post.
Good chapter and let them keep talking and work things out, thanks!!!!!!!!
Wow. And I agree with curious about T’s sacrifice. On the other hand, I think there are a lot of things that BOTH people ‘sacrifice’ or give when they’re in a relationship like that, and the fact that Tina doesn’t see that is, well, infuriating. Anyway, the race thing is far too big of a topic for me to comment on coherently, especially since it’s so easy to say things when you have no idea what it’s like, but this is as fascinating as ever, and I can’t wait to see more.
There was a lot of questions being asked by both Bette and Tina in this chapter. Some of which we have discussed on the different threads and yet when you see them in a chapter they become thought provoking once again. My question is can a person love someone regardless of their color or race? If so then why must we put labels on people?
I just want to say that I can’t wait for the next chapter….thanks
alright finally i got caught up!!!! Arr this is a really great story first off. I love the way you show their feeling and thoughts in all of this.now im excited and pumped up to read more so you should get to posting like soon
…And one more very very interesting chapter, Arkaycee. Great job ! You know, it had never struck me before that Bette could have ” picked ” HandyCandy, as some call her ( lol ! ), because she was probably biracial too, but this is a very interesting idea…Now I guess that element, that factor might have been relevant, indeed. And this does raise many further questions… But I’m sure ( and I hope ) we will soon be debating this on the boards when we rewatch those last episodes from season 1…
Just caught up with this story. Wow! Its great, I love the recaps. Pps.
i really like this story, great chapter
1st brb
Baby, both Bette and Tina need to do some soul searching. I believe until then they won’t be able to move on with each other. The fact that Tina vaguely remember the conversation about going with a black donor, only says to me she really have issues with Bette being biracial. Something that important shouldn’t have been dismissed. Ok I’m going to take up for Bette here. Maybe the reason she search for a white donor in the beginning was because she was keeping Tina’s feeling in mind and maybe she didn’t want her child to be subject to what she went through growing up and obviously what she has to deal with her entire life. This was a very good chapter and I can go on and on, but I’m going to sit patiently and wait for your next chapter which will be, lets say in a couple of days?
My brain is on overload right now. I can’t think of anything to say that won’t make me sound stupid. Just know that I’m enjoying this story and may come back later to add another comment.
Arr, you hit the nail on the head…I think you covered (in thoughts) the race issue perfectly. I think that Bette does question sometimes her lack of non-white friends. I think (again in my own opinion) that Bette and Kit also had a lot of problems in regards to growing up…trust me…I met sisters where one was bi-racial and the other “pure” black and there was always tension between then..going as far as teasing the one because she wasn’t black enough. I think that the comment Bette makes in the kitchen in S1 with Kit and that producer was more a dig at Kit then a disassociation as just a half sister. it was obviously something that they both fought each other with….You did an excellent job with this…and despite all of Tinas ramblings in the show…she has a problem with using a black sperm..so nice start…but again more questions than answers and you have a LLLLOOOONNNNNGGGG way before these two get to being happy TiBette!
I truly love those in dept analysis of both Bette’s and Tina’s characters. You put in words what many of us already were thinking a long time. But in my opinion the thing that started the downfall of the relationship was the lack of communication. Not telling to each other what really was bothering them. In fact they didn’t need an expert like Dan Foxworthy to tell them what the already knew by themselves. It was just another step futher away from each other. The biracial thing was indeed an issue, but in my opion a minor one, for instance why on earth did Tina have to quit work to prepare her body for pregnancy. This is a huge step in a relationship that was already shaky. Oh well, gonna leave for now, sorry for my rant. Thanks Arkaycee for sharing this beautiful story with us and I eagerly looking forward to the next chapter.
A really good chapter, I look forward to the next. =)
This is such an intelligent and nuanced discussion of their loving but crumbling relationship, artfully discussed. Where is this thread that you mention in your author’s notes that analyzes B & T relationship and the show? What’s the url? Could you write a comment here and post the address? Thanks.
this story is wonderful but sometimes it’s painful to read with all the issues B&T have to discuss…what a can or worms…but they need to go through them to be able to move forward with each other
I agreed with all above valid comments in regard to the racial issue. Anyway, my remaining gripe is how Tina felt she has ‘sacrificed so much to be with Bette’ Why is it a sacrifice to love someone and have that love return? Its more of a priviledge or blessing…and aren’t we suppose to give all of ourselves to the one we love, unconditionally! Thanks for bringing such thought provoking chapters.
Curious, you stole my heart with this comment…
I just have to say, this is such a brilliant story and this chapter is exceptionally so. Bette’s racial ambivalences and the ways she acts it out have always been a huge elephant in the living room of her relationship with Tina (and everyone else). So much heartbreak was foretold for them from the very first episode, and you’re doing a masterful job of laying it all bare. I can’t wait for the next chapter.
Whoops, azmama–my bad! A number of my regular commenters are active on the discussion boards, so this slipped my mind to meet your request, which I’ll also send in a PM to you in case you gave up waiting for me! Scroll to the top of the page, click on the gray “Discussion Board” link underneath Bette’s picture. There are many links to choose from, but in the The Dish, there are links to talk about the individual characters, and under Season 1 Dish (both of these are under the darker bar “The L Word Season 3”, there are episode links (a group of us are rewatching S1, so there is a link to each one put up weekly as we discuss them). In the Fan Fiction area, there is a thread for “ships (relationships), so there is a B & T thread as well as for many real and imagined ones on the show.
Altho tho the party was at Bette and Tina’s the men were invited by Alice etc, remember becuz Bette and Tina had run out of their resources…and they were having trouble finding any men willing to donate their sperm to a couple of dykes let alone a black or biracial man…