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First Year- Chapter 13
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At the close of that first day in the ICU I looked forward to going home, soaking in my tub and having a glass of red wine. I didn’t call Carmen all day but thought about her ‘I love you’. It both frightened me and exited me. Aside from Dylan it was rare for me to hear those words. My mother rarely spoke them. My father did on occasion whenever he spoiled me rotten with gifts and attention. So ‘I love you’ for me is a rare thing. After I got out of the tub I called Carmen to talk. She seemed a bit aloof. She ran through her day and we talked about some of my patients that she inherited. Finally after covering every topic but the one that was on my mind, I asked her, “What you said this morning? What did you mean by it?”
“What did I say?”
You said, ‘I love you.’”
“Helena I have always loved you.”
“So it’s just a generic friendship, sisterly ‘I love you’”
She remained silent on the phone. I wished I was there in person to see her expressions. She answered. “Yes. I have loved you since we were little girls. You are my best friend. I love you.”
I responded, “Oh. I see.”
After a brief period of silence she asked, “What did you want it to mean?”
I thought about it and took the safe answer, “Just that. Well, I love you too. I would dare say like a sister but then that would be incestuous.”
She laughed, “Yes it would be.” She took a more serious tone and said, “I miss you right now. Why are we not together?”
“I don’t know. You should come over.”
I didn’t have to ask twice. She packed her overnight bag and came over. I was anxious to see her even though we had just spent the night together. When she got to the door, I excitedly opened it. She had the biggest smile on her face. She jumped into my arms and nearly knocked me to the ground. We met our lips with a hard and hungry kiss. She had her legs wrapped around my body and I took her into my bedroom and fell on the bed on top of her. We quickly undressed each other and I began to kiss all over her body, she directed me between her legs which were wide open for me. She was very wet and her clit was fully engorged. I teased it with the tip of my tongue and she moaned her delight. I reached for her breasts and she took one hand off a breast and interlaced our fingers. I hungrily worked her clit with tongue, lips and mouth. Her moans were deep and loud. She nearly broke my hand, when her climax exploded hard and long. She was wetter than I could ever recall and she blushed about it when I came up to give her a slow and lingering kiss. Her eyes were moist and she caressed my face when we broke from the kiss.
We didn’t say much to each other for the rest of the night. It was a very special moment for us. Maybe it was too special. It would one of the last times we made love. I say made love because that’s what it had become. She never said ‘I love you’ to me again, our relationship became strained and distant after that night. It was a lot to consider with Dylan in the background. I knew what she really meant when she said ‘I love you’ but I was not there yet. I still had Dylan on my mind and in my heart. Things changed between Carmen and me and after that night. Our relationship would never be the same again.
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I’m holding out for Tibette. After the recent scenes with Helena and Dylan I can’t imagine them with anyone but each other.
S I figured that Carmen really loved Helena but Helena was not ready and still in a relationship with Dylan. I say relationship cause IMO she was not as much in love with her as she was when she first arrived to California. I actually like the pairing of both Helena and Carmen and well since you being the writer I must go where you go,lol. No matter what I will read cause I really want to know where her heart really belongs too, Dylan,Carmen,Tina,Bette and who knows if anyone else will come into the picture, as long as it’s not with MAX,,,HAHAHAHA!!!
Patpez-Not only will it not be Max, but Max will not even make an appearance in this story.
Your writing is so confident which comes, I think, from having a complete understanding of the setting and the characters along with their relationships. Just outstanding.
I guess its true what they say, happiness is fleeting. It seems particularly true for these two. So the vulnerability expressed and shared led to a strained relationship and eventual withdrawal? Or was the realization of bad timing simply too great to overcome? I guess it will be revealed across the next several months. Thank goodness, a story without Max.
Nice update…hmm…the poor GI bleeder is still in the hospital and getting worse…waaa! Hmm…I’m thinking Helena and Carmen were getting too close for it to be casual…but both painfully knew that in this way..they couldn’t really go any further. This unfortunately doesn’t sound like an open door for Helena to ummm clear her plate and return heart, body and soul to Dylan… Dylan, in Helena’s mind has become somewhat like background noise…now that is truly sad…. So we know there is someone else “entering” Helena’s domain…NEXT!! Senior Resident Williams…keepin’ em scared, off balance and wielding a ten foot pole like no other. Will she stay around like Tina or be with us temporally..only through this rotation?
Ok, so this end to Carmen and Helena must signal thebeginning of Helena and Bette. Hip hip hooray!!!
Happy? Well, too brief and bittersweet to be exuberant about it, but you’re on the right track. Like I said, I have a dirty mind. But despite that, I appreciate the way you depict how relationships grow and fade along with the emotions involved. Now, how about having Helena hook up with somebody for some hot, reciprocal, hedonistic sex? Or hot, reciprocal, deeply committed sex? I think you know what I mean. And leave Henry out of it!
I bet you thought I had abandoned ship didnt you Squirl? Lmao I’ve been here trying to catch up. Helena has alot to deal with and so does Carmen. Although Carmen is not in a fully pledged relationship she is still seeing Shane on and off so that is an entanglement in itself. Then Helena is having this secret life away from Dylan, and yes it must be hard to want to feel somebody there…but she needs to be honest, are her and Dylan working out. In this time apart things have changed dramatically they are not the same people they once were when they started their internships. I do think deep down that Helena’s heart has in a way always kind of belonged to Carmen, but I know she loves Dylan maybe it’s just in a different way. PPVS
Hey Squirl, or is it “Spider” cause your sure weaving a tangled web. Looks like Helena is growning into herself, Carmen represents days gone by and comfort, Dylan represents what might have been if they were more mature and further along in their lives or relationship so it seems like Helens is going to go through some growning pains but will end up just taking steps forward but is sorting out her needs along the way, as it should be, hehehe IMO. Oh yes hindsight is a beautiful thing. Squirl you have spoiled us with these regular updates but I guess all good things slow down sometimes. Good luck w/ back to work, hope your feeling up to it. I’ll be looking forward to the next post. Thank you, Md aka Oma
Helena has reached a point in her life, where things are not as simple as she once thought. Life has no promises.
That’s sad. I really liked the idea of Helena and Carmen, but I also like the idea of Helena with Dylan, Bette or Tina. I’m fickle! PPS!!