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First Year- Chapter 6
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“Because you are different, you’re a Peabody. You are very different.”
“Mother, I understand the burden of my name, especially here. I anticipated that I needed to perform at a high level but the standards seem to be ridiculously higher for me than the other residents.”
“Helena, you are a Peabody and I expect you will perform ridiculously higher. Please do not disappoint me. Your uncle and I are following your progress carefully. I know about that case of yours that was sent to the ICU. I understand you failed to make the proper diagnosis. I hope this doesn’t happen again.”
I felt heavy in my chest. I could barely catch my breath. Fortunately I got a reprieve when we were interrupted by a familiar voice. “Helena, I’m sorry to interrupt but I wanted to come over before we left and say hello to you and your mother.”
I turned to look at the voice I recognized immediately. I turned to greet her, her father and their guest. She had a full smile like what I saw from across the dining room. She looked absolutely amazing, her smile, her eyes, her dress were something to behold. I mentally shook off the thoughts running through my head and greeted her, “Good evening Bette. It’s nice to see you.” I turned to her father and extended my hand, “Mr. Porter, you are looking as handsome as usual.”
Bette was a most pleasant distraction. As usual she was sharply dressed. I recognized her dress as Armani also. It was a lovely wine color silk dress that contrasted beautifully with her skin tone. Her shoe was definitely Jimmy Choo’s. I was snapped back to the present conversation at hand when I heard her say, “This is my boyfriend Richard Greene.”
Richard extended his hand to me and smiled, “It’s a pleasure to meet you Helena. I have heard so much about you.”
I wasn’t sure what I expected but I was stunned to hear that Bette even spoke my name outside of the hospital. Perhaps she told him how much of a fuck up I was. She always seemed so aloof and cold. I almost wondered if she knew there was anyone else on her team. She never had lunch with us or did any of the social activities we participated in as residents. To hear she spoke my name and for it to be considered ‘so much’ was entirely surprising. I responded back, “Nice to meet you too, Richard.”
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Hmmm…that is interesting and I haven’t heard that proposed as a theory before. True that puritan rigor often amounts to a large stick up the ass. And back in Europe, in the earlier hosts to Catholicism, Italy and France, the people seem to attend mass and then go enjoy life once outside the church doors. The Spanish (without the cover of Santaria) after expelling the Muslims seem to have felt like they had something to prove and in being Most Catholic seem to have (at least until recently-Buh bye, Franco) been more dour in their outlook on sexuality, at least for women. The Irish, having once had a very distinct church of their own that Rome took great pains to snuff out, also seem to have suffered from a ‘no fun’ view of sex. It also seems that in many Latin countries a man is not considered homosexual unless he permits anal penetration, sort of like kids here that take purity pledges pretend that non-vaginal sex isn’t sex.
Humm so Hels is off to see Dylan, I hope its what takes her mind of her internship at the hospital. What do you mean about my story? I was kinda laughin at the sight of Helena seeing Bette smile for the 1st time…I found it sweet. But I know that Hels did crave for some physical attention and maybe just maybe that was the cause OR maybe it was something more. But I think she needs Dylan more than you’ve seen.
I can’t remember who else said it but I was kinda thinking Bette was putting on a front also. Then again maybe Bette’s so called man is gay and their both frontin for Melvin. I like Helena in this story she seems like a free spirit. I don’t think her relationship with Dylan will last much longer with Dylan across the country. I do believe Helena loves Dylan but she’s to much of a horndog to handle a long distance relationship. Is it Valentine’s Day? Man, it’s a good thing I’m single because I would have one pissed off lady right about now. The sad part is I probably wouldn’t care and I wonder why I’m still single. Happy Valentine’s Day to you too. Next update please.
S what a great chapter, how Helena saw Bette in a new light ;) so tell me is that the name you whispered :-))) Anyway, loved how Helena described seeing Bette smiling, laughing, and very affectionate with her boyfriend and Helena actually felt something more,,,,like it!
Glad that Helena saw bette in a different light,nothing is as beautiful as Bettes smile and her laughter, Glad that Helena is going to see Dylan. Sometimes Peggy is rough on Helena,she only wants the best for her.or is it she want the very best for the name. thanks
Well if it’s the end of the first month at least it’s still summer in Cleveland. I’m counting blessings on Helena’s behalf. Not that I expect them to spend much time outdoors on this brief visit (are you listening Squirl?), I just don’t want weather to ruin their brief time together. May there not even be thunderstorms! So this is the first time she sees Bette smile? Yes, mysterious wetness. I’m sure what’s his face is a great guy, but he needs to go away.
I don’t know but Jamaican’s(which I am native) are notoriously anti-gay. Even within the criminal court system. You killed someone gay, no problem, you’re a hero. Gay-bashing crimes are often not prosecuted. In many of the African countries the anti-gay sentiment is very high. Even here in the US the ant-gay sentiment is pretty high to the point that black men don’t want to be labeled as gay. In the medical literature here, they are labeled as men that have sex with men (MSM) instead of gay so they will cooperate with studies of sexual behavior in black MSM community. I’ll run it by my sister who studies and teaches about sexual health in Africa. She might have some ideas about this.
I’m curious as to what your take on this is: While I’ve never been to the Caribbean myself, I lived in NYC for years and knew many people either from there themselves or their families were. And yes, I was struck that the black folk from the English speaking islands tended to be frank in their homophobia (and one fellow I can think of was pretty blatant in his sexism as well), where as the Hispanic folk of whatever blend of Native/black/white tended to have a much more relaxed attitude toward gays. Any thoughts?
Thanks, it will be interesting to hear what she has to say.
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhmmm
fear of being called ‘faggot’ and ‘sodomized’ just for being less macho, maybe more intelligent than one’s ‘rugby’ playing peers is endemic in maori culture also. it is a ‘colonized’ attitude imported with the missionaries in the 1800s along with ‘church boarding schools’ and ‘the manly pursuit of rugby which has more faithful adherents than any religion. imo, until women en masse stand up [as they did in northern ireland against the sectarian war] against the prevalent bias and bigotry that causes all the -isms such as racism, sexism, hetero-sexualism, war-ism…men will continue with these destructive attitudes and attitudes. thx for the story…not sure where u r going with it tho’.
OMG, first of all Squirl I’m going to THANK YOU, for keeping your promise, that dose not usually happen for me so just seeing your post here this a.m. put a big smile on my face. Second THANK YOU for the Valentines wish,dido to you and Mrs. Squirl and the guys. Third but not at all least, I gotta go read cause it looks like you kicked up some passion here. brb, Oma
i meant ‘destructive attitudes and actions’…i believe we are born to live out ‘our own journey/destiny’ not someone else’s/dominant society’s propaganda…i think the world will be a healthier place when live our own lives…
Ok, had to process some thoughts, I’m some kind of weirdo because the loudest thing in my head is Richard “just call me Rick” I thought for sure, maybe even convinced myself, he was going to say “just call me Dick.” Don’t misunderstand, my godfather was always Uncle Dick to me and mine. Ok maybe it’s a family thing. The next thing is I can’t think that arousal from outside concerns has not benefited many partners, it’s just natural human behaviour. As far as the -isms go, I got caught in a dialog about that this very week, I must say until our goverment imposses punishment for even the slightest infractions and our schools start teaching tolarance in pre-K or even day care the slow, slow pace of change is not going to be realized in our live time IMO. Just so you know, the infraction that caused the dialog was in favor of one of mine and most certainly brought him comfort but none the less still raceism and needed addressed in this house. Squirl you Raqus my world, hope you feeling better today. Thank you, Md, ada Oma
I will ask her my sister for thoughts in the anti-gay sentiment…I think it’s religious. She sometimes reads my stuff so perhaps she will comment on her own…. I will post another chapter possibly as early as tomorrow. I have several chapters written already. East, you are funny, funny, funny….Oma, I hate the name Dick but I suppose it might be appropriate…
Oh thank you, thank you, thank you! I know Helena thinks she was a little moist because she was reflecting on Dylan and missing the human connection; but I just know my (RILF) fantasy of Belena is working it’s way into the story. Rick is a bit of an obstacle though…hmmmm… Bette looks in love with him so Helena may actually have to turn on a little Peaboy charm to get this train moving. Please Squirl…make it happen. Bette is certainly an enigma in the story. She is so cold and distant at work and yet in a social setting she seems gracious and caring. I am left wondering why? Next… Peggy presented as an interesting mix. She was helpful with taking care of her daughter’s domestic needs but doesn’t mention that despite her one failure in diagnosis, she has been picking up steam the remainder of the month and performing well. It certainly made me feel for Helena. I think you are doing a terrific job of setting up Helena’s mental state for a tragic fall. It’s only been a month and the pressure/distance from Dylan is beginning to show it’s affect. So when do we get another lovely chapter??? BTW, I am interested to hear what your sister has to say about the nearly genetic homophobia that is so endemic in the African culture, particularly among men. Let us know…
BTW…Oma, Rau…I am lost on the racism thing, where did I write something that had a racist tone, was it Stand rejecting his country? He did so because he didn’t like their politics.
Squirl honey, you didn’t write anything that touched on racism, it just got caught in that anti-gay, political, racist, religous, sexist sand box, sorry about that I will “try” to keep to the issues at hand. Ok stop holding out on us, copy and paste already, something to look forward to tomorrow. Thanks again. Md,aka Oma
OK here it is. My sister’s take. She thinks it might lie in the acceptance of Santeria(vodoo, etc) in some of these countries. Many of the Caribbean countries that are more accepting of homosexuality are Catholic(French, Spanish and Portugese speaking) instead of the evangelical/English speaking. In the countries that converted to slaves to Cathololism(Spanish, French, Portugesese speaking) there was more tolerance of Santeria(Cuba, Puerto Rico, Haiti, Brazil) than the evangelical church(English speaking-Jamaica, Bahamas, Barbados,Trinidad(although I think there is a big Catholic compoment in Trinidad). So Santeria, which as my sister said can be very wild sexually, was not tolerated by the evangelicals at all. So the issue may be more Sateria and it’s sexual freedom, underlying the Catholic church but not tolerated by the evangelical/born again church. I can certainly see that because the religious right here is the US are definitely a loud and vocal antigay faction.I hope that makes sense. I think she said it better.
Indeed, I hear you about people’s personalities preceding their professions. But will you look at Bette…as emotive and lovely as they come. Will she be so open “in the morning”? Does she have the armor up to keep her focused or to keep people out of her personal space? Hmm….Daily pimping…that would be the proper term! Helena is under some nearly unbearable pressure and she definitely has to find a way to cope…too much pressure…too much temptation that actually is not quite focused on her, yet! Will this trip out to see Dylan be enough? How is Dylan coping? You are definitely inspiring passionate discussions on many fronts. Looking forward to where you will take us! PPS
dare I think that B is putting on a master perfrmance for Melvin??? Hmmmm… Maybe that warmth was due to H…I’m just sayin’. To some of the points that have been made…you have to way religion and perceived machismo as two huge factors in homophobia…it is really startling!! Loved the insight everyone provides!! Amazed that you can actually post so frequently with your schedule…KUDOS!!!