I message Shane to see if she is free tonight.  I want to lie in her arms and tell me that he will be ok.  This is not uncommon for me, why do I feel so bad this time? 

‘Can you come over tonight?  I need you.  C’

‘Sure, maybe a little bit late.  Is it ok? S’

‘Yeah, just want to see you. C’

‘Are you ok, babe? I can cancel my evening engagements. S’

‘Don’t. I will tell you later. C’

‘See you later.  Missing you!   S’

‘ Me too!’ 

I am feeling better already just knowing that I will see her tonight.

‘’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’’

I got home around 6pm, didn’t feel like having any dinner.  There are so many things occupying my mind tonight and I don’t seem to be able to shut them out.  I watched the sun set and the neon lights turned on, huddling myself in my big armchair in the living room.  

Shane rings the doorbell around 8, my mood lightens up immediately.  I told her that the door is unlocked and she helps herself in.  

She drops the bags in her hands on the floor and rushes over to me, kneels down and cups my head with her palms.

“Honey, are you feeling ok?  The lights are off and you are curled up on the chair.”  She says concernly.

“I am just feeling a little bit off today. I thought you weren’t coming until later tonight.”

“You need me here, so I cancelled every thing tonight.  You are my priority.”  She smiles softly. 

“Thank you.” I lean into her, pulling her closer and holding her tightly.

“Tell me what’s wrong.”  Shane leans her forehead on mine.

“There is this little boy at the hospital, he came in with a chest infection and his condition is getting worst.  I am really worried about him.” I say in a depressing tone.

“I am sure you have done everything you could, if anything happen, you don’t need to feel bad about it.”  She comforts me.

“You don’t know…”  I am still not convinced.