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    Heart-Shaped Box, Ch. 39

    With a shuddering breath, she opened her eyes and found Tina in the crowd and leaned closer to the microphone, beginning to sing softly. I dont know if youll forgive me. For being so blind to how you felt. Dont ask me why I couldnt see it. She took another deep breath, her voice gaining strength. It might take me years to figure out. And thats not something I know much about. But theres only one way to find out. Bette was beginning to feel the music now as she pulled the microphone free from the stand. Yeah, yeah, yeah! she shouted, the crowd beginning to cheer, energizing her more.

    What I know is that I hurt you, she wailed. She leaned closer to the microphone and growled, What I know is that I suck and what I know is that Im sorry. Bette met Tinas eyes. And what I know is that Im losing you, she continued, pointing at Tina. What I know is I screwed up and that I never earned your trust. What I know is that everything I touch, she paused dramatically, hearing the crowd cheer louder. She kept her eyes on Tina. Just turns to dust. Bette finished quietly, dropping the microphone softly to the stage as she rushed off the stage in tears.

    Wow, who knew Bette could sing? Dana asked in wonder over the roar of the crowd.

    Everyone can sing. Some just not very well, Shane pointed out diplomatically.

    Alice was grinning from ear-to-ear. Way to go, Bette! She put her fingers into her mouth and whistled loudly. That was the poem she wrote for Tina.

    Didnt you help her? Dana asked.

    Well, I put in a few suggestions here and there, Alice said proudly.

    I figured as much. I dont think Ive ever heard Bette use the word suck in that context, Shane put in.

    That line did have that Alice flair, Dana agreed.

    Well, thanks, I think. Now come on, we need to talk, Alice pointed out as they worked their way toward Marinas office.

    *********************************************

    Tina found Bette in the bathroom, sobbing.

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