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    Heartbeat – Chapter 15

    “Oscar paid attention to me. He made me feel like I was attractive.”

    “I tried to…” Bette interrupted.

    “You were too busy with Provocations and then with her.” Tina couldn’t even say the carpenter’s name.

    “That’s not fair. You were busy with the center. You were at the center all the time after…” Bette couldn’t continue.

    “Say it…after I lost our baby.”

    “You never finished. Why Oscar? Did you use protection?” Bette’s biggest fear had been Tina leaving her for a man and seeking the stability of the “straight” life. She was once straight after all, but Bette had flipped her. Now her nightmare was coming true. “Was it because Oscar had a penis?”

    “God, Bette. It had nothing to do with that. It had nothing to do with him being a man.” Tina let out a frustrated breath. “I was able to talk to him, something I was able to do with you before.” She watched as Bette sat on the bed. “He listened. He paid attention to what I had to say. He took my advice into consideration. He made me feel what it was like to be wanted.” Tina admitted.

    “You know you could have come to me. You knew that.”

    “Really? Are you so sure? Franklin was up your ass about Provocations. Your career was in jeopardy.”

    “I would have put all those things aside…you seemed so strong afterwards. I didn’t think you needed me.” Bette still thought that Tina didn’t need her.

    “I needed you. I needed you to tell me that everything was going to be okay, that we would be able to survive it and continue. I needed you to stay home with me after you helped me off from the kitchen floor,” she cried, tears streaming down her face and gathering at her chin.

    “I didn’t know how to.” Bette admitted, wiping away her own tears.

    “Why her?” Tina pulled her knees up to her chest and hugged them, creating some sort of barrier between her and Bette.

    “She listened, like Oscar did for you. She made me feel wanted, sexy.” Bette lain on the bed and stared at the ceiling. Her breath hitching.

    “I wanted you…” Tina interrupted.

    “No you didn’t. After the miscarriage you were pulling away…slowly like I was.”

    Comments

    1. This talk is going to be tough; Tina and Bette both seem to have shut down at the memory of going through their “thing”. Maybe a few hours of space will help them prepare for the conversation they desperately need to have, but hopefully they’ll heed Kit’s advice. Thanks, tg. :)

    2. I don’t know how they are going to be able to come back together when they still have a hard time being honest with one another. I question how mature they really are if they can’t tell each other the truth. SO sad. Best of luck with their much needed talk.

    3. Communications is their biggest failure and after years you would think they got it right by now but typical tibette, I cant see bette hitting tina no matter what tina does to her so that was awkward to read…so sad the cheating and lies destroyed one of the greatest love of all time, hopefully it can be rebuild

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