Fan Fiction
This story has been set to a rating of PG-13. Age verification is required to proceed.
Hindsight – Chapter 22
Login to add story to favorites
(1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)You need to be a registered member to rate this post.
Loading ...
One thing I knew…, I had to be honest, not only with her, but with myself too…, I couldn’t carry on living my life the way I had been, burying things…, ignoring things hoping they would go away…
I had to stand tall and face the consequences of my actions, and I had to take a deep breath and say what was inside of me, I just hoped that when the time came, that the words followed…
She held me tightly as all the thoughts went through my mind, I felt her hands on my back, gently soothing away the tears and fears…, how could she have that intuition about me…, did she still care…, I had no doubts about that…, I just didn’t dare wonder about the stuff that came with it…
I moved my head into the crook of her neck, it always did fit so perfectly there, but then… didn’t we always just… fit perfectly… When did the time come when it stopped being perfect… Did our perfect fit become obscure with life in general…, with each of us taking the other for granted…, with two becoming three…, with a couple becoming a family…
Was it the scenario of square peg/round hole, did I not fit with her any longer because of my feelings and need for the uncomplicated world of suburban heterosexuality… The simple answer to that is a big fat No… but I found I didn’t fit there either…
God… she smelt so good, she felt so good…
I felt her lean back, resting her chin on the top of my head, my tears had subsided, the storm inside had calmed slightly, the fears hadn’t though, and I knew that later, much later…, I would have to go back to the house and face them…
“Are you okay…?” she whispered to me.
I merely nodded, I knew she would know there was still emotions inside, but she always had a way of telling when the right time was to ask that question, I sighed… there always seemed to be a mountain to climb in my life recently…
She lean back and looked at me directly, she looked straight into my eyes, I saw the slight smile she gave me… it was one filled with a mixture of sadness and compassion, she brought her hands to my cheeks, and her touch was so gentle, almost as gentle as her gaze. Her thumbs grazed across my skin as she wiped the tears that continued to escape, I saw her lips part and knew that her words were intended to sooth me and calm me… She always did that…
"You know… this morning… when we both said that it would be okay…?” she said.
“Yeah…” I replied.
“It will be T… it’ll be okay…” she said in the quietest voice, she leaned forward and kissed my forehead, the only words that would come to mind at that moment were gentleness… and tenderness…, “why don’t we get Angie ready and go to the park…?”
“Okay…” I said as I tried hard to smile at her, I knew now had to be the time for me to voice those things that had been swirling in my mind, she had done nothing but support me since this morning when in reality she had every right to kick me to the kerb for my behaviour over the last months, it was the least I could do to tell her, at least begin to try and tell her…
She began to turn, to prepare for our outing to the park, I saw her hesitate, but she smiled as she turned…
“Bette…”
“Yeah…?”
“Those questions you asked me…”
I saw her take a deep breath as she heard the words I had said, she merely nodded in acknowledgement.
“The answer is no… to both questions…”
She blinked at me, taking the words in… “I… uh… um… wh… uh… what… did you… say…”
I smiled at her hesitancy, she always mumbled over her words when she was shocked to hear something.
“The questions you asked me in Angelica’s room…?”
She nodded.
“You asked if I was happy…”
“Yeah…”
“And, if I… uh… if what we went through… was worth it… all the heartache… and uh… the pain…”
She nodded again, but her eyes welled with tears, I could only guess how much heartache and pain she had gone through.
“I’m not happy Bette…”
“You’re not…”
“No… I’m not…”
“And was it… was it all worth it…?”
“No… it wasn’t worth it… I just don’t know what to do about it…”
“T…”
“Yeah…”
“It’ll be okay…”
“Will it though… my life is such a fucking mess…”
Comments
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.
Jo, great update as usual. I rather like the back and forth. It gives us all a chance to see as you said both sides of the story..which by the way the show doesn’t do a good job at sometimes. These two are so messed up..each in her own way. They must take this time to put all the cards on the table and work it out. They still love each other so much. Keep up the great work and keep posting often. Thanks so much!!!!
Another great one. I love the way you are writing this story. Both sides of a conversation, different perspectives. Very emotional.
Jo you are too funny!I like the format in which you are writing. It has been that way from the begining of the story.It does draw it out more, but who cares. Your writing is so fucken awesome, I just want more!!!PPS
Nice update. Always appreciate the opposite view from you. Eventually I hope we can get them on the same page.
Well, Tina’s admitted it. Ball’s in Bette’s court now… Nice chapter, thanks Jo.
It´s good that Tina answered Bette´s question. And now? What comes next? :) You know I think you do it splendidly. I sure love to read this story. Another great update.
Hey Jobadge, it’s your story, you do it your way. I love your style and your writing anyway. Your way of giving each person’s point of view across is very thorough and brings out the fact that nothing is just black or white. Keep it going, I love this story, thank you.
OK, Jo, Bette got her answers. Answers that she would like. Now, she has to move forward on them.See how Tina responds to a little bit of intimacy….a touch, a caress, a look…something.
I enjoy your writing and the way you are posting the differeing POVs. It’s always better to stay true to your creative vision.
Hey Lamentamini, I’m the one that leaves the comments that look smartassy (isn’t that a new fragrance?)and insulting but are really praise. Tina needs to stop worrying about answers that Bette wants to hear and just get to the truth for both their sakes. Somehow I think the answers will ultimately please Bette anyway. Anyway, let’s go to the park in southern California, cause the ones around here are fucking freezing! Currently 17F/-10C.
Sorry, forgot to congratulate you on your recurrent commenting primacy, your highness.
I love the overlap, personally. Great technique. I LOVE this incredibly slow burn/reunion (I hope?). I just… arg, I adore it, even with all the pain, though it seems to be slowly retreating. And funnyone, it’s freezing here, too.
i have to said that i like it so much this story and that every chapter makes my hearth beat fast. This one was so good and i think that maybe there is a ligth at the end,Tina finally was honest with Bette and Bette is willing to support her (i hope so) then is time to Bette to claim Tina again!
I am enjoying reading what is going on in each of their heads in different chapters. As I was reading this chapter and Tina says that Bette does this or that, I can remember what Bette was thinking or feeling when she was doing that. Yes, it is most definitely a slow burn…but with a fex exceptions, slow burns really are the best! :-) Thanks!
You keep writing the way you are…this story is wonderful. I love how we get both perspectives.
I like the back and forth as well – your writing is super.
I like this and you can write however you want…I’ll still read it.
I like what ever you write thanks
Maybe I skimmed through the comments too quickly, but I thought people loved this technique so we can hear both sides of this conversation! It’s fantastic, and I hope to see you continue this way of writing it. Just hope Henry doesn’t barge in, though!
This is so good and keep them get talk more and work thing out!
I like the back and forth perspective. I just sometimes need the conversation not to be too painfully heavy. What can I say, I hate drama. I love this story however.
well its about time they are talking little by little..will they ever get this work out? things for the update jo
Hey, Miss 1st again!…..your cheating.tks, I think we really needed this follow up from Tina’s pov, now that it’s out there on the table the really hard work is about to begin….pls let them survive
LMFAO@Jo
Oooo – 1st again!
Oh crap, I commented before I read. I had no idea that annoyed people as much as it does. Gee, the ones that annoy me the most are the ones that at first glance look like praise but are really just smartassy (yay for made up words) and insulting.
JO!! You can’t be first all the time!! Hmmpf! I like the back and forth persepective. It gives a view on both Tina’s thoughts and feelings but Bette’s as well…Keep up the great job!
Hey Jo, Personally I like this different take aned in fact have mentioned my support in comments to previous chapters. What makes your story and writing so enjoyable is that you are prepared to take risks and have the talent and drive to carry it through. If that upsets some readers then so be it. You have to follow your own desires. Being able to listen to the voices in both Bette and Tina’s head adds to the wonder of this writing. I truly feel a patr of everything they sa and do. Their emotions and motives are there for all to follow. Bravo for having a unique voice and crafting a marvelous adventure. Much thanks and gratitude to you, Your Loyal Fan.
Great update Jo! At last, they are making some progress! :D baby steps at least … can’t wait for the next chappy!
Hey, I’m awake LOL….Have to say being first on your own chapters isn’t cool mate LOL!!! I absolutely love the overlap, remember you can’t make everyone happy, but I’ve a feeling the majority are ecstatic :o)) This was more than okay, a little late I let you know, sorry :o)) xx
Any chance of getting Angelica’s POV? j/k ;) I don’t really have anything to comment on this time unless I say yet again that Tina shouldn’t have answered the phone. But then if she hadn’t she might not have gotten that hug from Bette and a kiss on the forehead. It’s defintely all about the hindsight here. Thanks! =)
No i dont imagine it was worth it for Tina…for either of them!, but at least she can admit it!..so now they can talk about it…its out there Tinas not happy!..Good one!
I love the way this story is written. I love to reread the chapters again because they are so well written and I want the story to keep going. Please keep writing, it’s awesome. I love the pace of it. The drama is great.
OMG, we’re really falling into the turmoil now, arent we? no was to take back those words… Wonderfull, as always Jo… Oh man do I know about being ‘insecure’ about writing a slowburn… But indeed what you said, a situation is lived differently by different ppl, and its the reason I use this style in one of my own stories and I love it in yours… We get to see the whole thing, no gaps to fill in, because you share with us this gift, in all the meanings of the word… Because you already know how I feel about your gift with words, but this story is also a gift for all of us TiBetters, who still believe in true love, and its a gift to them, the blonde and the brunette, who have stolen our hearts… Thanks Jo!
Great one Jobadge. Tina must really talk to Bette and tell her what she is thinking and feeling. Can hardly wait for the next one.
I know another great writer well known for her slow burn and her alternated perspectives from B&T on the same events. It’s a very difficult exercise and yet gives the reader a wonderful tale about TWO people. That’s what TALENTED people do. Not that you need to prove your talent… This is a wonderful story, Jo, and wonderfully written! Don’t forget who is the Master behind the masterpiece. Your compassion toward your readers honours you, but I can’t begin to tell you how bothered I am by people asking longer chapters, hell, asking ANYTHING from the author. And what I know for sure is that a new post from you is nothing but a gift. Thank you for that.
LMAO@Lamentamini wanting Angelica’s POV!
I’m going vote YEA! for the back and forth and for the slow burn in general!! This story is so different from the others in its format and I find it absolutely amazing, the style adds to drawing me in to the characters and what is happening. Maybe some folks need that MTV, 4,000 images per second writing that is so common in mass media these days. I, for one, am enjoying the languid and rich pace/story you are telling, except I would love longer posts!!