Dana sighed and threw her jacket down on her couch. It had been a long night for her. She hadnt been able to sleep worth a damn last night, thanks to Alices sudden burst of insecurity. After the concert and the very disconcerting conversation on the stairwell, they had gone back to Alices apartment and spent the rest of the night in complete silence until Bette had called the next morning to tell them that Tina had the baby. Dana had just come from the hospital and had suggested that Alice drop her off at her apartment so that she could get some clothes and shower. And somehow Alice had agreed without saying a word and she had driven Dana home and Dana had gotten out of the car and walked up toward her house, the two women still not talking. Now Dana sat in her very bouncy chair and thought about everything that had happened over the last few days. She was exhausted. She didnt know what to do about Alice. She really didnt think that she wanted to see other people, it was just that she still had a lot of unresolved feelings when it came to Lara. It was just last year that she had thought that she was in love with her. Lara was the first, and basically only woman that Dana had ever been in a real relationship with. And up until Alice, Dana had still had moments of regret about the redheaded chef. Dana had already faced the fact that she had never been in love with Tonya, and loathed to think about where that relationship would have landed, but she always knew that she had loved Lara. She had screwed it up so badly and then when she might possibly have been able to salvage the relationship, she had done nothing. That was what she had regretted the most. The nothing that came after her big coming out. She had done nothing to show Lara that she had finally embraced who she was and that Lara would no longer have to be her dirty little secret. Dana took a deep breath and held it for as long as she could. *****. She stated to the empty room as she finally let the breath out.

Bette looked down at her daughter and smiled. She couldnt ever remember being any happier in her life. Shes beautiful. Bette heard Kit say quietly from behind her.

She is isnt she? Bette couldnt remove the grin from her face. Tina will be in any minute. As if on cue, Bette and Kit both looked up as the door to the room opened and a couple of nurses rolled in a bed holding her wife. When the nurses had left, not before telling Bette where everything was including the button to call if she should need anything, Bette walked over to the bedside and looked down at Tina. Her eyes were still closed, but Bette could see her trying to wake up. Tee? She whispered as she took Tinas hand and leaned closer to her. Baby wake up. Bette kissed her forehead gently. You have to meet your daughter. Shes beautiful, Tee. Open your eyes.

Kit watched her sister gently try to coax Tina awake and smiled to herself. It had always been amazing to her to see the younger woman when she let her guard down she was an entirely different person. Almost sweet, if Kit didnt know any better. She decided to give them some privacy and told Bette that she had to get going. Her sister barely looked up from the blonde as Kit shook her head and smiled one last time before opening the door and heading out. Tina had just started to wake up and Bette held her hand loosely waiting for her. Bette? Tinas voice came out hoarse and whispered as a small relieved smile graced Bettes face.

All of the doctors had told Bette that Tina was fine, but until this second when Tina had uttered her name she had not realized how worried she actually was. Tears welled in Bettes eyes as she answered. yeah, Baby, its me. Im here. And theres someone else here too, who wants to meet her mother. Tina struggled to open her eyes and sit up all at the same time. She wanted to meet her daughter. Ariana. She croaked. Take your time, Tee. Bette held her hand and tried to push her back down. But Tinas eyes were open and she was still trying to sit up, so Bette got a firmer grasp on her hand and helped her to sit up. You awake? Bette tilted down so that she could look into Tinas eyes to see if she was ok. She turned to get her some water. Here drink this first. Itll help your throat. Bette held the cup up to Tinas lips and the blonde drank the water with Bettes help.

Ariana. She repeated her voice sounding a bit better.

Bette walked over to the little bed that held their daughter and carefully picked her up. She wondered if she would ever get used to the fact that she was so tiny. here she is. Bette said as she handed the baby over to Tina.

Shes beautiful. Tina whispered as she looked down at the baby in her arms. Tears came to her eyes as she studied the tiny face and hands of her new baby. Tina hadnt really understood until now that it was possible to love someone so quickly. She never wanted to let her go. Tina looked up from the baby into Bettes eyes and was taken aback by the intensity that she found in them. She had never seen so much love in them before, but she knew that her expression must have been a mirror image of Bettes. Hi there, beautiful. Tina whispered to the baby. There was nothing else to say as she held the baby in silence, awed by how beautiful she was and how much she loved her. Bette had perched herself on the edge of the bed and she kissed the top of Tina head as they both stared at their new daughter.

Alice hated Lara. She hated her with every nerve ending in her body. It was strange because she had never hated anyone in her entire life. True, there were a lot of people that she had come across that had warranted her hate, but she wasnt the type of person to ever hold a grudge against anyone. But right now she was having a serious grudge attack against Lara and Dana. She had been watching the two of them flirt for a week now and it was beginning to make her sick. Each of them stealing glances over at her to make sure that she wasnt looking. Anybody could have seen them for gods sake. Alice put her car back in gear and headed off again. She didnt know where she was going only that she didnt want to face the empty apartment. It would only mock her and make her insecurities bigger than they already were. And if they got any bigger Alice was afraid that she would end up doing something that she would regret.

Carmen and Shane sat on the couch both women staring straight in front of them. Shane didnt know what to say to Carmen. She knew that the previous night had not erased everything that happened in the last few months. Carmen had been steadily dating Jenny for a while and they were both worried about her in their own heads. So. Shane said, needing to break the silence. It was beginning to get slightly uncomfortable. Um.. Carmen started. She raised her hands and cupped her left fist in her right hand as she turned to face Shane. Last night was amazing, but I think that I should go. I mean, you know get some clean clothes and shower and stuff. Carmen wondered at her inability to make anything but small talk with Shane.

Uh, sure, yeah. Shane nodded her head. The two of them got up off the couch and Shane walked to the door with Carmen. They both stopped and faced each other and Carmen recognized Shane fighting with herself about what to say. Shane opened her mouth to speak, but at the last second closed her teeth around her bottom lip.

What? Carmen asked with a small smile.

Nothing. Shane bent her head toward the ground. I just Shane slid her hands in her pockets and Carmen wondered how it was possible for someone to be so cool even when they were nervous. Look I didnt mean to freak you out or anything. Shane looked up to a blank stare from Carmen. I mean last night I didntWhen I told youwhat I told you, I didnt mean to freak you out. Shane repeated staring at the floor again. I mean I dont expect you to be impressed or anythingI mean I meant itI just-

Shane was cut off by the feel of Carmens mouth covering her own. Carmen pulled away from the kiss and forced Shanes eyes to meet her own. Ill call later OK? Carmen kept eye contact with Shane until the other woman nodded. Bye. Carmen walked out the door to her car leaving Shane staring after her.

She spent the night huh? Jenny walked up behind Shane and smiled tiredly when her friend jumped.

Yeah. Shane said as she turned toward Jenny. Jenny, I dont really want to overstep any boundaries here, but I gotta know. This morning was that because of Carmen? Because, Shane shrugged. Because I want you to know that if youre not OK with this Shane really had meant it when she told Carmen that she loved her, but Jenny was important to her, as were all of her friends. If it was Al or Dana or any of them she would do the same thing.

Jenny smiled appreciating the sincerity in Shanes voice. I think you should go for it. You guys really do make a good couple. Jenny had never had a friend like Shane before. The only other person in her life that had showed her so much loyalty was Tim and even though things between them had gotten very strained and hardly friendly she had almost died when he left. She still missed him sometimes. Tears started in her eyes as she thought about this and Shane came over and wrapped her arms around the writer. I just dont understand how I got here. Jenny sobbed into Shanes arms. I know Im weird, but thisthis is psychotic, right? Jenny pulled away from Shane to ask her the question.

Youre not weirdYoure interesting. And writers are supposed to be a little psycho, right? Shane smiled lightly when Jenny did. Were gonna get you someone who can help, Jen, I promise. And Im gonna be here the whole way, as much as you want me to be.

Jenny looked at Shane and paused as she tried to stop her tears. When she finally had her crying under control Jenny looked up and tilted her head to the side. Im glad youre here. Shanes jaw tensed as she tried to keep her own emotions at bay. Me too. She said as she leaned over and pulled the writer closer to her.

Some how Alices car had driven her to the Planet and she stood outside watching the Red Head behind the counter smile and say good bye to Kit. What are you doing, Alice? She asked herself in disgust. Just go home. Great, Dana had turned her into a stalker. Alice sighed irritably and turned back toward her mini. This was completely ridiculous.

Lara raised her eyebrows as she stepped through the doors to hear Alice remark that something was ridiculous. Alice? She asked, making sure the blonde with her back to Lara was actually Danas best friend. Whats ridiculous? She asked when Alice turned around.

Alice looked up startled, she hadnt realized that she had spoken the last part out loud. Nothing. Alice said shortly. I was just getting coffee. You know for me and Dana. Alice said meaningfully.

Lara nodded. Shouldnt you be heading in then? Lara pointed toward the door that Alice had just turned away from.

Yeah. Alice drew out the word trying to decide what it was that she wanted to say. Alice walked past Lara and grabbed the door handle, but just as she was about to open it she stopped. Stay away from Dana. She said quietly staring at her hand resting on the door, wishing that she had just opened it and went inside.

Excuse me? Lara wasnt sure if she heard Alice right. She was pretty sure that Alice understood her intentions toward Dana, but she had never expected her to say anything about the two of them.

Alice turned around slowly, surprised by the possessiveness that had crept up on her. I want you to stay away from my girlfriend. Alice looked directly into Laras green eyes.

Alice, Dana and I are just friends. And I doubt that-

Alice cut her off. I think both of us know that what you feel towards Dana is a lot more than friendship, so I want you to stay away from her. I dont want you confusing her right now.

Are you afraid Alice? Lara wasnt about to give up on Dana with out some kind of fight. She really had started to fall in love with the shy tennis player. No. Alice said as she turned and walked into the Planet. She had sounded confident when she had spit the word out at Lara, but she was suddenly terrified that she would lose Dana.

* * * * * * *

I brought you breakfast. Mark hesitantly stood in the door way to Jennys room holding a plate with a muffin and a cup of coffee in the other hand. Jenny didnt look up from the blank screen that she had been staring at for over an hour. UM, ok, Ill just leave it here for you if you want it or whatever. Mark nervously stepped into the room and set the items next to Jenny on her desk. Ill be out there if you need anything ok? Mark waited for jenny to answer, but when she didnt he left the room slowly looking back at her. Mark stared for another second before turning and walking out the door. It seemed like she got worse everyday. She didnt say much to him anymore. Or even Shane for that matter. Mark new what was going on, Jenny had given Shane permission to tell him everything when rent was due and she had no money to pay it. So Mark had understood and had covered his and her share of the rent. Shane had been eternally grateful to him and that had been enough for Mark. He just wished that there was something that he could do for Jenny.

Shane! Shane! Are you home? Mark recognized Alices voice coming from behind the door and ran over to answer it before heading back out to the garage for a little while. He had to keep popping in and out though because Shane had asked him to keep an eye on Jen until she got home from work. Mark threw open the door, Alice, hi. Shanes at work right now.

Alice walked through the door and stepped into the house. Well, will she be home soon? Alice looked at Mark.

Um I dont know. She should be. Do you wanna wait? I could get you something to drink or something. Alice nodded and followed Mark to the kitchen and sat down at the table while mark went over to the fridge.

Would you let your girlfriend be friends with and ex? Alice wondered out loud.

What? Mark had been putting away the iced tea when Alice had spoken and he had missed the question.

If your girlfriend ran into an ex that she liked and she wanted tooh I dont knowGo out to dinner with him, would you let her? At this point Alice didnt care who she talked to.

Mark walked over to the table and sat down across from Alice contemplating the question. Well Id like to say yes that I am that secure, but the real answer is probably I would end up telling her to go so I would LOOK like I was secure, and so I wouldnt cause an argument. But truthfully I would probably hate the idea. Why?

No reason. Just curious. Theres no more hidden cameras or anything around here is there.

Mark sighed, No. Then he braced himself for the lecture that he was sure would follow this question.

He was surprised to see that Alice was smiling. You know that was a great idea. I mean really it was an invasion of privacy, but it probably had promise.

Not one of my better decisions. Mark said relieved that he hadnt offended Alice as badly as he had Shane and Carmen and Jenny.

Am I on any of those tapes? Alice asked. Mark nodded shamefully. And Alices cheeks reddened as she remembered her and Dana having too much to drink one night after one of their get togethers at Jenny and Shanes house. you perv. She said as she slapped his arm. I

m a perv? You guys did it on jennys desk! Mark pointed out.

Alice sat in silence for a moment. Do you think I was good? She asked suddenly

Mark let out a loud breath at the absurdity of the question. I dont know Alice, I dont-

Oh come on, I now you watched it. What did you think? Alice looked at him.
Well at least you have the grace to blush. She said when Mark reddened and failed to answer her question. Tell me what you thought, unless youre going to try and tell me that youre the one guy in the world that doesnt get off on the idea of two chics going at it.

Honestly? Mark asked, finally relenting, and Alice nodded. I thought you guys were amazing. Mark said slowly. It wasnt like watching a movie to get off or whatever, Mark was becoming slightly uncomfortable, It was like REALLY intense. Like I could tell that you guys were really in love or whatever. I felt like I was intruding. Mark looked away from Alice. I didnt watch the whole thing.

Alice thought for a second about what Mark had said. Do you really think she looks like she loves me? Alice asked quietly.

Definitely. He answered again thankful that Alice didnt hate him. Since he had been hanging around with Shane and her friends he had found that of all of them he liked Alice the best. She was by far the most understanding and had the best sense of humor. Mark watched Alices face as she let the idea roll around for a second and then watched a slow smile form on her face. Do you still have the tape? She asked as the smile turned into a sly grin.

* * * * * * *

Bette looked down at Tina as she slept, and then at the tiny Baby resting on her own chest. They were both beautiful. Bette had been amazed at how quickly her life had turned around. She had just been ready to let go of the idea that Tina would ever forgive her when Tee had called to tell her that she should be a part of the babys life. And she couldnt even begin to describe the feeling that had electrocuted her when Tina had said that she wanted to come home. With those words Bette hade been so happy she could have cried. Tears were threatening her now as she looked down at Ariana sleeping soundly on her chest. She had barely slept at all last night thanks to this precious bundle. She smiled thinking about it. Every time that she had started to fall asleep deep enough where she could no longer feel her daughters breathing she had been startled awake by panic. She would wake up and her own heart would only slow when she was alert enough to feel the gentle pressure of the baby breathing in and out on her chest. So even though she was exhausted she had somehow made it through the night without having a nervous breakdown. She was so beautiful, Bette just couldnt get over it. Tina stirred next to her and Bette looked over to see Tina looking at the two of them. Good morning. Bette whispered.

Tina smiled. She was slightly surprised that it was already light outside. Bette must have decided not to wake her last night when Ariana had woken up. She hadnt slept a full night since her and Ariana had come home from the hospital. They had been taking turns in the middle of the night for the most part, but Tina was definitely the one who carried more of the weight. Morning. She whispered back as she continued watching the two of them. Bette rolled over carefully and gently laid the baby next to Tina who had rolled onto her side to face them. Then she settled herself down onto the pillows facing Tina and the baby. You let me sleep. Are you ok?

You mean besides the heart attack I had every time I fell asleep and couldnt feel her breath? Bette smiled sweetly at Tina. Yes Im fine, a little tired, but I can handle it.

Well you had better take it easy, you have to go back to work soon. I dont want you having to go back there all rundown and sick because youre not getting enough rest. Tina raised her hand over the baby and touched Bettes cheek. Bettes eyes had darkened and she had closed her eyes. What is it, Bette? She asked, her voice laced with concern.

Bette winced at the question. She had not told Tina about Franklin firing her. She had been so wrapped up in happiness for the last few days that she had not wanted to burst the happy bubble that had formed around the new family. We should talk about it later. Bette whispered, keeping her eyes closed.

Whats wrong? Tina asked. If were going to do this, Bette, you have to be honest with me. I dont want you keeping things from me and taking care of me anymore. I can take care of myself. And part of being in a relationship is letting me take care of you. In the back of her mind Tina thought about the absurdity of having this conversation at a whisper, but Bette had to understand that she wouldnt go back to the way things were. Tina caught Bettes eyes and saw the seriousness behind her gaze.

Bette swallowed and made her confession. Franklin fired me. She said quietly.

What!?? Tina asked a little bit too loudly as the baby stirred next to her. She gently rubbed Arianas belly and waited for her to settle back down. What? Why? she asked again in a whisper.

I was fired. It doesnt matter why hes been trying for a long time now and he finally got his way. I wasnt keeping it from you Tee. I mean I was, but not to keep you in the dark or protect you from anything. Its just that weve been so happy for the last couple weeks. I wasnt quite ready for reality. Bette looked at Tina hoping that she understood. Please dont be angry with me. It was a new concept for Bette to feel so insecure. But that was exactly how she felt. She understood now that Tina didnt need her anymore and there was nothing that she wanted to do to make Tina second guess her decision to come home.

Im not angry, well Im angry at them, but I understand. Tina smiled reassuringly at Bette and them down at their baby. I know how you feel. Tina reached down and traced her fingers over Arianas forehead.

Bette smiled relieved. How about some breakfast?

Id love some. Tina replied slightly distracted wondering if Helena Peabody had something to do with Bettes current predicament.

She hasnt moved? Are you serious? Shane had just come home from work and Mark had been sitting on the couch waiting for her.

Yeah, nothing. I went in and I tried to talk to her, but she just sat there and then she just went back to bed. Its all she does. She just sleeps. I didnt know what to do. Mark jumped up off the couch and followed Shane toward Jennys bedroom.

Jenny? Shane had knelt down next to the bed and was trying to wake her friend up. Jen? She asked again. Jenny woke up and looked at her and even though she her eyes were open Shane was still worried. Jenny, wake up. Come on you have to get up. Shane helped Jenny stand up then had to catch her friend as she threatened to lose her balance.

Whats wrong with you guys? She asked as she sat back down on the bed. Are you getting as crazy as I am?

Were worried about you thats all Jen. Shane sat next to her on the bed and was surprised when Jenny started to cry. Tim used to call me Jen. You guys are a lot alike. I think you would have liked him. Jenny knew that in reality they were nothing alike except in the way that they could make her feel. Both Tim and Shane could both make Jenny feel that there was someone who truly and unconditionally cared about her. I just dont want to put all of this on you guys. I dont want all of you feeling sorry for me like you have to be responsible for what I might do. Jenny cried into her hands. you shouldnt have to worry about me so much.

Its what friends do, Jenny. Shane took Jennys hands and forced the other girl to look up at her. Have you been going to your appointments? Jenny nodded. Arent they helping at all? I cant afford it. Jenny pulled her hands away from Shane and started to twist her fingers together. Jenny tilted her head to the side and looked at Shane trying to decide whether or not to tell her the rest. I found out how much it was going to cost and I knew that I wouldnt be able to afford it, but I didnt want to do anything to worry anyone, so I went and bought some stuff to help me sleep. I thought if I could just sleep through everything, eventually I would be ok. I know its stupid It

s not stupid. Youre not stupid. Shane found Jennys eyes again by slouching down to look up at her. Were gonna find some way that we can afford this ok? I dont know how, but were in this together ok? Shane waited for Jenny to acknowledge her. Until then, stop taking this *****. Shane held up the bottle that Jenny had pulled out form under her pillow while she was telling Shane about what was going on. Jenny nodded and Shane reached over again to hug her.