“Dana. Have some common sense. No one knows you’re a *****.”

“You did,” Dana pointed out, the anxiousness in her voice ever present.

“Well yeah,” Alice said, trying to think of something to say. “But other people don’t know you like I do. They don’t have the connection we have,” she explained with a smile that made Dana all gooey inside.

“They don’t?” Dana asked innocently, knowing the answer but reveling in this display of affection on Alice‘s behalf.

“Of course not you doofus. I’m your best friend – I’m supposed to know all the little details about you that no one else knows.”

Dana smiled. “Well I guess that is true,” she said as her heart skipped a million beats after hearing those two words – ‘Best friend.’ Two words which so definitely distinguished her from all of Alice‘s other friends and acquaintances. Two words which gave Dana just that little glimpse of hope that maybe, someday, it would change into something more.

“Of course it’s true. So now tell me you *****, tennis playing stud. Now that I know your preference, tell me who you have the hots for?” Alice asked, attempting in no way to remove herself from Dana’s lap, which neither of them minded.

“Allllice,” Dana whined playfully, although deep down really hoping that Alice would change the topic, which she knew of course, she wouldn’t. “This stuff is still embarrassing.”

“Yeah and I’m entitled to all your embarrassing opinions, stories, etc – it comes with the job,” she retorted, throwing back with her retort the dazzling smile that she knew Dana was a sucker for. “So who is she? Or is there more than one you player, you.”

“No Alice. There is just one.”

Alice made an ‘ooooh’ noise, causing Dana to blush before she continued her interrogation.

“Ah so would I know this lady?” She asked in an innocent fashion.

Yes, quite well, Dana thought. However she struggled to think of someone in her memory who she could pretend to like.

“I don’t think so. No,” Dana replied.

“Hmm.” Alice was obviously annoyed that she didn’t know this person Dana liked. “Ok then, who is she?”

“Her name is Lara; she’s a chef at the country club.” Lara was actually a very attractive woman who had been flirting with Dana for the past few weeks. Knowing that Alice was, and for all she knew, forever would be, out of bounds, Dana realised she wasn’t exactly lying as she started describing the chef.

“Very intellectual occupation that one,” mumbled Alice under her breath, quickly snapping out of it as she saw Dana’s questioning face.

“What did you say?”

Alice looked a little dazzled as she tried to think of something.

“Ah – Yeah, just that I wouldn’t know her… you know, country club isn’t my normal hangout…”

Nice one Al.

Dana didn’t quite believe that was what Alice had said, but let it go and continued to answer her questions about Lara. As they continued their conversation, it convinced Dana more and more to actually make a move with Lara.

She’s not Alice, but she’s nice and hot, and interested.

“So are you going to make a move on your chef?” Alice asked in a slightly sarcastic tone.

Dana looked into Alice‘s eyes, wishing she could just have the courage to tell her that it was Alice she wanted, but she couldn’t.

“I think… I think I might Al.”

Alice‘s face fell. Dana was going to go out with this chef, and it was because of her ***** intervention. Let’s be a little more retarded shall we? Why was she so pissed off in the first place? Yes, she knew the answer. She just wasn’t quite ready to admit it.

“Good,” Alice replied in an uncertain fashion. “I think it will do you some good Dane.”

Two weeks later, Dana and Lara were an item. Two weeks later, Alice finally admitted to herself her real feelings for Dana. Two weeks later, Alice had sized up the competition and was ready to make her move.