I was sitting my by desk, in front of the lap top. I just got home from school, and the first thing I did, not only today, but every day, was to check my mail. I waited unpatiently before the three little word popped up on the screen. Youve got mail. I felt a tingle in my belly as I opened it and read the first lines. Dear Kathy. I know we just spoke to each other, but I cant help but miss you. I cant wait to hold you again. I miss your touch on my skin and I just want to be near you. I smiled for myself as I kept reading. Somethings missing when youre not around, you are the reason I breathe. Its hard to see you at school, knowing that I cant step up to you and hug you and kiss you, and show the world that youre mine. I want to embrace you so bad, because that is where you belong; in my arms. I dont have any doubts about my feelings for you, and I wish I could be near you all the time. Sometimes I think Im going insane, but then I look at the photographs you gave me, and all my thoughts and troubles just go away. I cant picture my life without you, you make me complete. You are the one thing that keeps me sane. I miss you all of the time, and I hope you miss me too. Suddenly I heard a knock on my door and my mom entered my room. I heard her sigh when she saw me in front of the lap top. Kathryn, do you have to sit by that thing all days? She asked me. Bette, most people wait for an answer after theyve knocked, they dont just barge in cause in that case they wouldnt even have to knock. I shut the lid of the lap top and turn around to face my mother, and I could tell I was making her angry. Hey now, young lady, dont give me an attitude, Im your mother, and I would prefer to be called mom. And I would prefer to be called Kathy! I stared at her angrily. Hey, dont be rude, Im still your mom! My mom told me. Well, stop being such a pain in my *****! Let me live my life the way I want to! I shouted back at her just as Tina came into my room. She stared at me, and the disappointment was written in her eyes. Suddenly I felt ashamed, I loved both of my moms and I wouldnt change them for anything in the world. I looked down at the floor. Im sorry. I mumbled. Bette stared at me, like she couldnt believe her ears. I had never said that to her, or anyone else for that matter, before. I didnt even know myself where it came from. Tina laid her hand on Bettes back, and Bette flinched a little. She looked at Tina before she turned around and walked out of my room. Tina looked after her and then turned to me. You really hurt her, you know that right? I kept staring at the floor. Yes. I answered her, still feeling ashamed of myself. Tina sighed and walked closer to me, she kneeled before me and put her hands o my thighs. Why is it so hard for the two of you to get along? She asked me softly. I looked her in the eyes and sighed. I dont know. Whats changed Kathy? When you were little, you and Bette used to do everything together. I used to be jealous cause of the bond you shared. She sighed. When did it change? Youre pulling away from us, and were struggling to keep you here, but we cant seem to reach you. Were trying so hard to be the parents youd like to have, but it feels like were failing over and over again. What are we doing wrong? Youre not doing anything wrong, mom. I love you both loads. It was really breaking my heart to hear these words from my mom, and I realized that I had pulled away from them. Then why dont you ever tell us whats going on in your life? Can you even remember the last time we had a real talk? I I dont know. I said with tears in my eyes. I kneeled down beside my mom and let myself be wrapped up in her warm embrace. I sniffled against her shoulder and tightened my grip around her. Im sorry mom. I whispered to her. I love you, I really do. Its okay, baby, its okay. Tina said and kissed the top of my head. She rocked me for a couple of minutes and it felt great. It felt like I was 4 years old again and I felt safe in my moms arms. We just sat there for a while, before Bette once again entered the room. When she saw us sit there she sat down beside us and embraced us. I started to cry and I wanted to stay like that forever. But of course nothing lasts forever, and it all ended way too soon. Hey, what do you guys say if we rent a movie tonight and order some pizza? I was surprised by hearing Bette say these words but I nodded my head and said Id really like that. Tina smiled and agreed with me. Bette was beginning to rose but I grabbed her arm and pulled her back down. I love you mom. I said and looked into her eyes. She smiled at me and kissed my head. I love you too sweetie. And with that she went out of the room. Tina and I rose too and I hugged her again. Dont have such a rush to grow up baby, youre only 16. Live a little. Tina told me and kissed my head again. A couple of hours later, we all went down to the video rental store to rent a movie. Bette and Tina were looking at the romantic comedy movies, while I was looking at the news. I read the back of some movies, but couldnt find anyone I wanted to rent. I looked at my moms, and they were actually holding hands. I hadnt seen that for a long time, and it warmed my heart. I went up to them, smiling. Have you found anything you want to rent yet, sweetie? asked Bette. No, have you? I asked, smiling at her. Well, we know you dont like the movies we do, so we decided to let you pick the movie today. I stepped in between my mommies and put my arms around both of them. Cant we pick a movie together? Bette and Tina smiled at each other. Of course we can, baby. Tina answered. We ended up with one of my favourite movies, even though I had already seen it lots of times. We went back home and I went into my room to change to some slacks. I changed and was ready to leave when the lap top caught my eyes. I sat down in front of it and flipped it open. I wanted to answer the e-mail before getting out to my moms. Emma. Thanks for the e-mail. I miss you too. I wish things werent this complicated. I miss your touch, when we kiss its like youre breathing life into me. I want you so bad, can we meet tomorrow after school? I need to feel you again. I need to hear you scream my name again. Love Kathy. I shut off the lap top and headed into the living room. Bette and Tina had an intimate moment. They were kissing passionately and Bettes hand were somewhere under Tinas shirt. Kids in the house! I interrupted them. They turned to face me and Bette put her hands where I could see them. Come here baby. Tina waved at me to come sit with them. Tina leaned towards Bette, and I leaned towards Tina. She stroke my head as I pushed the play button on the remote control. The pizza arrived 10 minutes later and I got up to open the door. Wheres the money? On the table in the kitchen Bette answered me. I took the money and paid the delivery guy. I brought the pizza into the living room and we ate it in front of the TV. By the time the movie ended I was really tired, and all I wanted to do was to get some sleep. I kissed my mommies good night and headed towards my room. I started up the lap top again, to see if Emma had answered my mail. But she hadnt so I went to bed. It didnt take me long to fall asleep. The alarm clock woke me up at 7:30 the next morning. I shut it off and sat up on my bed. I got the remote control for my stereo and turned it on. I sat down at my desk and opened the lap top. I had gotten a mail. I opened it and read. Kathy. Id be happy to meet you after school. But we cant be at my place. My brother has the flu so my moms home with him today. Maybe we can be at your place? Love. I thought about it for a moment before answering her mail. ‘Emma. Yes, we can be here, but it has to be later tonight. Were supposed to get over to my moms friends, but Im sure I can get out of it. How is 8 pm for you? Love Kathy.’ I pressed the send button and got dressed. I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and put on my make-up. Then I went back into my room to get my backpack before I headed off to school. Bette and Tina ate breakfast at the table in the kitchen. Im going to school now. I said opening the door. Stop. Bette told me and I turned to her. Arent you gonna eat breakfast? Im not hungry. I told her and started to walk out of the door. See you later. Bye! I shut the door before they had the chance to say anything to me. I knew Id hear about this later, but at the moment I didnt care. I met Mary by the tree, where we always met, and then we walked to school, just like we always did. When the day had come to an end I walked home, and I was surprised that Bette was home at this time. Hi mom, why are you home so early? She seemed to be working at the kitchen table, but she looked up at me and answered. Im working from home today. At what time are we supposed to be at Alices? I asked. Um, at 7, why? Bette asked. I was just wondering. I went to the fridge to get a bottle of water. I took a zip and looked at my mom from behind. Do I have to come? My mom stopped in a movement and turned around to face me. What do you mean? I mean; do I have to come? My mom looked at me like she didnt really understand what I was asking. You love to go to Alices. She finally said. Yea, but I have lots of homework to do. I said, shifting my weight from one foot to the other. And Id rather do them tonight instead of being stuck with them on a Saturday. Or a Sunday. I added. Bette kept looking at me. I think its time that we have a talk. I sighed. I knew what was to come, and Id rather not have this talk. But I knew that we had to, so I took a seat by the table. Youve been acting really strange lately, is something wrong? She asked me. I knew she asked cause she was concerned, but I didnt like it. I felt like she was snooping. No, everythings just fine. I said. Theres just a lot going on at school at the moment. Bette nodded her head at me. Um. Have you met someone? I looked at her, and I wanted to tell her, but I couldnt, cause I knew shed be disappointed at me. Met someone? I asked, trying to sound innocent. What do you mean? I mean, have you met a girl you like? Or a boy for that matter. You know that it doesnt matter to us if youre in to girls or boys. I shook my head. Mom, Id rather not have this conversation. Ill tell you when Im ready, ok? Sweetie, I just want to know whats going on in your life. She told me. I was getting irritated with her. Well, I want you to butt out of my business. I hissed and got up from the table. Youre coming with us to Alices tonight! She said loudly at my back. I went in to room and slammed the door. I flipped open my lap top and write a quick e-mail to Emma. Change of plans. Meet where we use to as soon as you can I shut off the comp and packed some of my stuff into a bag before I opened the window and climbed out, knowing that Bette would be furious. TBC.