“Well, what color do you want, then?” Shane asked.

“No color! It should be white. It’s cleaner that way. And I want brushed steel appliances…is that okay, Dana?”

“I don’t care, whatever makes you happy, honey,” I replied. The rest of them were mocking me, so I flipped them all off.

“Can I help you pick out some things to coordinate, Alice?” Jenny asked. Al just shrugged, but I smiled at Jenny. She looked like she was still feeling guilty about the fire although we’d all told her it wasn’t her fault. I thought it’d be good for her to work on the kitchen with Alice. Shane had mentioned recently that Jenny felt like she didn’t really hang out with the group enough, so I was glad she was trying to change that.

When Helena got there and Max had finally driven over, we decided to just go ahead and get pizza since it would be easier and less messy. Before it got there, Shane and Jenny went home to take showers to get the smoke smell out of their clothes and hair, and Alice and I did the same. We left the others in the living room with the remote control and headed to our private bathroom off the bedroom.

“The reason I was so freaked out about Chicago is because of when I was a kid,” she said quietly as I washed her hair.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, it’s dumb, but when I was little…my dad would have to travel so he could work on projects and stuff. He was like a carpenter I guess, I don’t really know. But he’d have to take jobs out of town. And my mom…well, you already know she traveled for work,” she said. I nodded to show I was listening to her.

“And like…when one of them would come home to the other, there was always this…distance. Like they were blaming each other for being gone and for the relationship being shitty, even when it wasn’t really the distance at all, you know? And I don’t know…I spent my young childhood always dreading when they were both in the house together, because there was always this tension that they tried to hide from me so we’d seem like a happy family, right? And it never worked, and I hated it. And I know it’s dumb, but I’m afraid of that happening with us if we never see each other,” she went on, not looking at me. I washed her back and sighed.

“Sweetie, I’m so sorry you saw that. But I guarantee that’s not going to happen with us, okay? We love each other and we’re going to talk and see each other, Alice. It’s not going to be that way. I promise you, okay?”

She turned around and hugged me, and we stood under the water holding each other for quite awhile.

“We should probably get out there. If Shane and Jenny beat us we’ll never hear the end of it,” I said into her hair.

“You think they’re showering together?” she asked, not making any attempt to move.

“Would you stop? I don’t know and I really don’t care, okay? Seriously, they’re my friends. I don’t need to picture them doing anything beyond hugging all the time.”

“They really do hug all the time, don’t they?" Alice asked, looking at me with her eyes shining. “I think they’re in love with each other. Maybe they don’t know it, but I think they totally are.”

“Stop!” I insisted, laughing at what I thought was an absurd idea. And even when we’d gotten dressed and gone back to the living room to find Jenny sitting in Shane’s arms, eating pizza with the rest of them, it never occurred to me that Alice might be right.

**********

“You remember?” I asked her. She looked at me with her eyes shining, and I knew she did. Smiling, I took a drink of my water and started talking again.