It came roaring back to life now, and Bette knew she had reached a cross-roads.  Although she understood decisions she had made much earlier had set things that were about to unfold in motion, she couldn’t help the strong surge of regret about the timing of both events, taking place out of sequence, but in each of their ways transformative.

Why were they careening into her life at the exactly the same time?  She straightened up, naked by the bed, and looked up at the ceiling, trying to find an answer from the heavens.  Bette felt as if she was witnessing two powerful waves on a collision course in the middle of an ocean, with her floating on a boat, caught in the middle, helpless to stop them, as they came rushing at her.  She dropped her head into her hands.

What was left for her now?  Her mind whirred, mulling over a thousand options, willing itself to find a way for her and Tina. Later, maybe later, she would figure something out.

But right now, at this moment, there was one thing left that she could control.

Memory.  And Bette resolved to remember.

She would hold on to this memory.  Of them; of the day, and all the days before that; of the nights shared, especially their last night together, for now.  She hoped the memory would be strong enough to help her find a way to take them back to this place someday, to this corner of heaven.  She hoped everything they had shared would be enough for Tina to hold on to also.  

Tina would need courage, and strength, to hold on to the hope the blonde had elected to choose last night.

Bette shut her eyes.  She whispered, as she took one last long look at the sleeping blonde,”I promise you Tina, I’ll find a way.”

She walked quickly to the desk by the terrace, grabbed a pen and scribbled a single word on the hotel stationary, drew a figure out quickly, then folded the slip of paper.  She looked around frantically, and spied Tina’s travel jacket slung over a chair by the corner.  She grabbed the jacket, and slipped the paper into one of the inside pockets where she had seen Tina slide her keys in, the morning she and Tina had driven to the blonde’s apartment.  She zipped the pocket up, then folded and laid the jacket on a corner of the bed.

Bette turned away quickly, before she lost her nerve, and ran to the closet to grab her ”go” bag, quickly pulling out underwear, a tank top, linen pants, and slipping these on quickly, as she walked around.  She walked back towards the main bedroom, and saw her ballet-style flats by the door, where she had kicked them off when she and Tina had staggered into the suite last night, pulling and grabbing at one another’s clothes to get them off quickly.  She slipped them on, hopping on one leg after another to do so, as she rushed towards the door, pulling a last object from the bag, the satellite phone.