Bette was up early. Over the last few days she had absolutely thrown herself back into her photography. It was something she had always enjoyed but she had somehow forgotten how it made her feel thrilled and peaceful all-at-once. Bette couldnt wait to get up this morning. She had decided to go to one of her favorite places and watch the sunrise and take a few shots of how the shadows would change as the sun came over the horizon. She had been careful not to awaken Tina when she left. They had been up late talking. As thoughts of Tina raced across Bettes mind she felt her heart skip a beat, or two. Bette was so grateful to have her back in her life and vowed to never do anything so careless with Tinas heart and trust again. She hated what she had done and as she made the vow to herself with the early morning sky as her witness it dawned on her this wasnt the first time she had made this vow. That broke her heart. She thought to herself, Guess Ill have to prove that saying wrong. She had been taunting herself with Once a cheater, always a cheater. Not me! she said aloud as the first hues of pink were showing through the light blues and gray of the sky. Bette couldnt help but think, A new day, a new beginning. With that she became mesmerized at the skys beauty and the light and shadows as they began to dance across the sky. The shadows began to let the suns rays lead, as the shadows faded away to light, Bette resigned herself to hope.

Alice couldnt sleep. She didnt know if it was because she was still thinking of Dana or if the disturbing news she had heard about Shane was the culprit. She decided it was a bit of both. The latter is what made Alice get out of bed at what she considered an ungodly hour. She stretched her weary body and said aloud, I cant make Dana talk to me but I can go talk to Shane”***** I have to. I cant let her continue to self-destruct like this. With that Alice decided to shower and go out searching the streets of We Ho for Shane. She had left four unanswered messaged in two days. She felt bad because she had promised Bette to keep an eye out for Shane and to talk to her. Apparently she had done a horrible job of both. As Alice left she called Shanes phone again, and again it went to voicemail. She rode by the Planet it was still really early and only a few very early birds were there. Alice decided she would go by Shanes apartment. She wasnt expecting her to be there because she normally goes home with the tart du noir. Surprisingly Shanes truck was there. Alice now debated on what she would say to her wayward friend. Knowing there were at least three others in the small apartment she didnt want to wake them in her attempt to talk to Shane. She knocked softly at first but heard some noises behind the door and decided someone was up and knocked loudly.

A bewildered Shane opened the door.

Shane: Al what are you doing here? You guys never come here and thats two of you in less than two days.

Alice: Well good morning to you Shane. What are you talking about? Did Bette come see you?

Shane: Be..Bette? No, no, I wish. But Dana came over yesterday after she left practice.

Alice: Dana came over here? Well how is she? Did she look okay?

Shane immediately picked up on the nervousness in Alices voice and that was all she needed to confirm that there was something going on or not going on between Alice and Dana that they needed to deal with.

Alice realized her tone had changed and decided to try to block all thoughts of Dana and to deal with Shane and Shane only, at least for the moment.

Alice: Shane why arent you taking my calls? Look Im getting worried about you. You havent been to work in what days a week now”whats going on?

Shane: Well its not like I have a lot of clients anymore so I go only when they need my help sweeping up. Ive been reduced from a salon owner to a sweep up girl in a matter of weeks. I managed to ***** up absolutely everything in my life by reaching for the unobtainable Al. I just couldnt leave well enough alone.

Alice: Look things will pick up again at work but lets focus on one issue at a time. I just dont want you sitting in here pining away over, over Bette and she doesnt want you to do that either.

Shane: Youve spoken to her. How is she? I know she hates not working”is she back to work yet? How does she look?

Alice couldnt help but see the true concern for Bette that Shane had. She also saw a little bit of joy mixed with a whole lot of pain at the mention of Bettes name.

Alice: Look she misses her friend”a lot. Shane with all she has been through she really needs all of us. Things between her and Tina are going well. There is still so much love there. Bettes really changing she taking the time to appreciate what she has and that includes you too Shane.

Shane: Al, you dont get it. I would love nothing more than to be her friend but I cant go back and undo what Ive done. Tina will never trust me and things between Bette and I will always be weird. I love her and I dont regret that but I regret telling her. I just dont know how long I could have been around her without doing something really dumb.

Alice: Shane, thats kind of why Im here. Ive heard you have been getting really drunk every night and sleeping with anything that moves. Look, thats not like you. I cant stand to think of you doing some sort of nosedive and ruining your life. And Bette will end up hating herself thinking this is some how her fault. Shane we all love you. You have to know that. Please tell me whats going on and how we can fix this. We all miss you”all of us including Tina and especially Bette”*****, especially me. The fact that Dana came over that has to tell you how important you are to all of us.

Shane sat quietly and listened but she felt so empty and alone but whats worse she was totally misunderstood and she didnt think she knew how to make Alice understand”she wasnt certain she understood, not really.

Shane: Al do you ever look at your life and say, is this it? Is this all there is to it? I cant complain”you guys have no idea what my life was like before I met you all. The thing is after meeting you guys I saw all of these possibilities of what could be. Bette in particular always shone the brightest to me. Al ,God, I mean she is beautiful, kind, thoughtful, smart, funny, caring, attentive, did I say beautiful?

Alice: Hey”Look I know all of that about her. I used to date her and I know she is really special, thats why she is still such a big part of my life. I love her and Shane she loves you to”as a friend. She told me you guys have a short hand and I agree. Its like you instinctively get her when she cant put things into words. She misses that”she misses you.

Shane stood up and looked out the window trying to conceal her tears from Alice.

Shane: Al no matter how many I sleep with none of them is her. You are right I have been getting with anything that moves just to make this loneliness leave me”but it always gets worse. If Dana hadnt come over last night I would have gone out again and picked up two or three more and for what? I dont know how to stop this. Im not sure that I can. I would give anything not to feel this way about Bette but the truth is the truth. Its a wonder things like this dont happen more often. I mean you and Tina both see how amazing she is. Friends have things in common and that means they could have the same taste in women, right? And is that weird to fall in love with your friend. I mean, you like the same things and each other, thats why you become friends. Is it strange that one day you look at your friend and really SEE them?

Alice pondered what Shane was saying and she agreed that it makes sense that you could become physically attracted to your friends ***** she was going through that very thing with Dana. Though in her mind Dana made a poor choice in committing to Tonya, she had made a choice. Was Alice just as wrong as Shane? The thought made Alice shiver.

Alice: Shane you are forgetting something. Bette has chosen Tina and shes truly happy with that decision dont you think you should be happy for her?

Shane: Yes Al I do think I should be happy for her and part of me is very happy for both her and Tina. But

Alice: But what Shane? Look they have had a really bad time lately and now they have a chance. I know when all of their problems surfaced it was a shock and disappointment to all of us. Apparently you took it really hard too. But you keep seeing what they lost instead of whats still there and realizing that its so much stronger now than it ever was.

Shane: What if Tina leaves her again? You guys didnt see how devastated she was. God I just dont want her to know that kind of pain ever again.

Alice: For the record Tina had every right to leave. Bette had betrayed her. But whatever happened we should respect their decision to mend their relationship and support it. If you dont want to see her hurt again why are you bringing her the pain of losing your friendship?

If Shane were honest with herself she would have to admit she hadnt considered Bettes feelings at all. All she could see is what she wanted to give Bette and what she wanted Bette to give of herself. It was starting to sink in that what she wanted Bette to give of herself wasnt Bettes to give anymore. She had given her heart completely to Tina. Shane slumped down in her chair and tears began to fall to her cheeks she realized she had painted herself in a corner of isolation and she so desperately needed her friend back and didnt know how to go about getting her back. Alice sat there and patted her friends arm not knowing what to say or do.

Bette got back home just in time to see Tina off for her day.

Tina: Babe you left early why didnt you wake me? I wanted to go with you to see the sunrise.

Bette: T we were up so late talking and I didnt want you to be tired today at work. So I went and got some really good shots. How is your day today? What time do you think you will be able to leave work?

Tina: I have an appointment with another guidance counselor and then a budget meeting with Oscar. I should be free at around 12:00 today. I was hoping we could spend the afternoon together. Babe I, I -never mind.

Bette: No”Whats wrong T dont censor yourself like that”its me you can tell me anything whats wrong.

Tina: Things have been really good between us and I just want to know.

Bette: T? Come on what do you want to know, what babe?

Tina: Okay, dont think Im crazy and tell me truthfully how you feel about it. I dont think Im rushing its just so much craziness has happened and I try not to think about it but Bette I almost lost you and I didnt. I mean you got a second chance at life and we got a second chance to get back together. I just believe in second chances -I guess the second time is better than the first. I mean you just know how to appreciate things more, right?

Bette: T, normally when you ramble like this I think its adorable and Im noticing your beautiful eyes sparkling and your cheeks getting flushed”adorable but babe I still have NO IDEA what you are getting at. T, please tell me because though its adorable you are starting to scare me a little bit.

Tina: I want us to try again, a second chance to have a baby.

Tina said this and closed her eyes as if she were making a wish; hoping that Bette would be happy and receptive to the idea. She knew it was soon but in Tinas mind it wasnt soon enough. Life has a way of throwing stuff at you that helps you put things in perspective; and Tinas vision was clear, to love her wife and to have a happy loving family with her.

Bette lost her knees just at the idea that Tina was ready to consider this made her happy”overjoyed. She thought she had heard the words and she searched Tinas face but her eyes were closed. Bette needed to see her eyes.

Tina slowly opened her eyes she hadnt heard Bette respond and her fear started to creep in. As she opened her eyes she saw Bette standing there with a smile that made her heart skip a beat. She saw tears forming in Bettes eyes but she still hadnt responded. She needed to hear her say something”anything.

Bette: Did you really say you want us to try again T?

Tina: Yes, yes babe I want to have a family with you and I dont know why we should wait any longer.

Bette rushed over to Tina and held her in her arms and kissed her with so much love and passion Tinas knees became weak.

Tina: Is that a yes?

Bette: Its an absolute yes.

In all of her excitement Bette realized this was kind of quick. She wasnt sure if she was happy because she really wanted the baby now or if she was happy that Tina was sure she was ready for them to start their family now. Tina noticed Bette tense up a little and it was almost like she read her mind. She grabbed Bettes hand and walked her over to the sofa.

Tina: Sweetie I want this and I know Im ready now but if you would rather wait tell me and I will understand.

Bette: T I want to start a family with you. I do, today if at all possible. I just have one reservation though and I dont want you to be mad at me.

Tina: How did you say it? Dont censor yourself”its me. Tell me.

Bette: Tina I dont want this to sound selfish but we just got back together under some of the strangest circumstances. I know the last year or so of our relationship was rough. Baby I miss you and I dont want us to lose sight of the fact that regardless of when we have our children, we are already a family, you and me. If we never have kids T. I need you to know that you are my everything, the complete package. But it will be a blessing and honor to have children with you.

Tina sat there amazed at Bettes honesty and feeling completely loved. This”This is why she wanted to have children with Bette and this is why she didnt feel the need to wait. Tina wrapped her arms around Bettes waist and held her tightly. She began crying sweet tears of joy knowing she was loved and it felt so good. Bette felt Tinas tears run down her neck and slowly parted their embrace not wanting Tina to be angry or hurt she wanted to know if she was upset.

Bette: T?

Tina: No babe Im not upset Im the luckiest woman in the world. Im just glad that we can talk to one another and listen and be heard. Thank God for couples counseling.

Bette laughed, yeah but baby its more than that. We both want to be here and we never stopped loving each other. Tina Im the luckiest woman on earth and I feel like shouting from the rooftops that my wife wants to have my baby.

Tina laughed and playfully hit Bette on the knee.

Bette: Did you mean what you said about second chances? Because Im thinking that before we bring our new addition into the family there is some serious mending that needs to happen.

Tina: Shane”I guess if we gave each other second chances she deserves one too but babe if she cant stay within her boundaries she wont be a part of this family and Im serious about that.

Tina looked at her watch and realized she was running late she hadnt intended to have such a heavy conversation on her way out the door but she was happy with the results.

Tina: Babe I have to run. I will be free by 12:30 at the latest. What are you going to do until then maybe we can have lunch together later?

Bette: I am planning on shouting from the rooftops of West Hollywood that my wife wants to have my babies.

I dont recommend you do that. Tina said laughing at how silly and happy her ***** wife was at this particular moment. By the way baby”not babies, one at a time okay? Tinas expression changed and said, babe you made an excellent point about Shane why dont you try to talk to her yourself maybe we can find some understanding.

Bette was shocked at Tinas request but extremely happy. Are you sure?

Tina: Hey second chances have been very good to us Im hoping this wont be any different.


TBC