"I mean–" 

“No, no, no I’ll answer the question.” Bette patted Tina’s knee as she spoke.  “Uhh, let’s see, I have a very strict schedule. Things that require a time table and including someone else and romance along with spontaneity doesn’t work to well with my life. And besides that I‘ve never seen myself as the ‘marrying’ type. The very idea of making someone put up with me for a lifetime is enough to scare me into celibacy.”

“You say that like you’re a horrible person?” Tina laughed at the direct answer that came from Bette.

“No, not horrible, just at times, unbearable, there’s a difference. I think on some degree I am an absolute pain in the ass to be around. I mean really would you want to be around someone who’s always so…” Bette smiled as she chose to stop herself before she began down this path again.

“ ‘So’ What?” Tina prodded looking towards Bette. She was grateful for the fact that it was the middle of the day and the café’s back deck was practically empty. “You were going to say something, what was it?”

“Guarded. I don‘t like people asking me to many questions, pressure from work I can handle but the third degree from a potential girlfriend is almost aggravating.” Bette said nervously twisting her fork in between her fingers. She never wanted to admit that to Tina. She liked that Tina never saw her as a closed off figure in her life. She was open and fun with her but now she felt like maybe this confession would change Tina’s prospective of her.

“I have.” Tina caught sight of Bette’s questioning head nod and continued. “Rick.” She simply answered and picked up her lemonade to take a drink. Bette nodded her head and sat back waiting for Tina to continue. “Where we grew up, the small town, Rick and Alice were the odd balls. The half black kid and his gay cousin were the constant news around. He was always so private and  his thoughts were even more secluded.” Bette nodded her head. She could relate to the feeling that Tina was trying to convey. She herself felt alone and isolated from a world where she was neither one thing nor the other completely. “I get that you want to be in your own head sometimes and, people tend to feel like you may be shutting them out, out of anger.”