Bette leaned into Tina.  “I can’t do this TinaI can’t.I”

Tina kissed Bette on the lips and then kissed her cheeks in turn.  “You canand you will.”

“TinaDylan is asleep.  I need to put him down for a nap.”  Bette needed to put Dylan in his crib.  She also desperately needed to avoid the issue at handand Tina’s gaze.

“OkDante’ is finished too.  Let’s grab the next two.”  Sammy had drifted off so Tina picked up Taylor and Bette picked up Rene.  “These two are hungry huh Babe?”

“Yeah.”  Bette kept her eyes averted.

“Sit down Babynext to us.”  Tina was very concerned.

Bette sat down next to Tina and looked at her.  The sadness in her eyes pulled at Tina’s heartstrings.  “Listen to me.  This is going to be toughbut we will get through it.  You’ll see Bette.”

“I know Sweetieit’s just so hard to deal with.  I don’t want to shut you outsometimes I just feel like I can’t talk about it.  I don’t want to talk about it at times.  Tina, I look at Dante’ and he’s so perfect looking.  You can’t tell there is anything wrong with him.  But I know there is and.”

“And?”  Tina looked Bette in the eyes.  “And you love him less?”

“NoI don’t love him less Tinano.”  Bette began crying.

“Then let’s deal with it Bette.”

“TinaI need to say it.  I have to tell you something.”  Bette’s tears flowed freely now.

Tina continued to look at Bette.  “Tell mepleasetell me.”

“I can’t say itI can’t.”  Bette looked away again and held Rene closer to her. The baby had fallen asleep.  Bette got  up and placed Rene in her crib after gently kissing her cheek.  Bette then picked up a sleeping Sammy and held him close to her *****.  It was a very protective embrace.  She appeared not to want to let go of him.

“Baby.”  Tina whispered to Bette.  “Please tell me Babyplease.”

Bette looked at Sammy and noticed he had awakened.  She began feeding him.  He sucked gently on her left breast with his tiny fingers tenderly resting on her skin.  Bette closed her eyes.  “I love him moreI love him more Tina.I love him more.”

Tina now had tears in her eyes.  “You love him more than the others?  Is that it?”

“YesI think I love him more.I’m a terrible mother.”  Bette sobbed quietly as she held Sammy to her.

Tina got up and put Taylor into her cribcarefully tucking her in.  She walked back over to where Bette sat and sat down next to her.  She leaned over and kissed Bette’s cheek.  “You’re a wonderful mother Bette.”

“How on earth can you say that, Tina?”  Bette stared into Tina’s eyes.

“I can say it because it’s true!”  Tina wrapped her arms around Bette and pulled her to her.  Their warm skin touchingtheir little boy in Bette’s arms.warm and safe.  “You love him in a different way Betteit’s just different.”

“Different?”

“Differentjust as you love Taylor because she looks like me.  Just as you love Dylan because he is the little boy you always wanted – with his beautiful features and lungs.”  Tina smiled. “Just as you love Sammy because he has a beautiful smile.  Just as you love Rene because she has such a beautiful way about herher mannerismseven at this age. Every one of the babies is special Bette.  Every single one of them is special.”

Bette smiled slightly.  “Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“I thought..”

“You thought it was wrong to feel differently for him.  It isn’t.  I hate to tell you this Bette.you’re normal!”

“Don’t you EVER call me that again!”

“NORMAL!  Bette Porter-Kennard is NORMAL!”  Tina chuckled and held Bette closer to her.  “And.”

“What T?”

“I love youeven if you are normal!  We do need to get out there and break the news to Mom and Dad.  Are you ok?”

“YeahI am.  Tina?”

“Yes?”

“I adore you.  I don’t know what I’d do without you.”  Bette turned and gently kissed Tina on the lips.  “I never want to find out.”

“You’re the old one, remember?  You’ll go first.”  Tina giggled.

“Oh yeahhow could I possibly forget?  You keep reminding me!  Thanks a lot T!”

“Anytime Porter.  Let’s put Sammy down and go talk to Jackie and Melvin.

TBC