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Provocations Linger- Chapter 7
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And then, you thought so little of me, you came back to our bed and didn’t tell me.”
They stared at one another. Bette looked stricken. She’d waited so long to talk to Tina but found she had no answers for Tina’s words.
"Do I sound like I can come back to you?" Tina whispered.
Bette looked back out the window for a long moment, wavering. Finally her gaze returned to Tina, defeated. She followed Tina’s path to the door
“No, you don’t. Not now. But I don’t think you should lose everyone else just because you can’t see me. I think you should keep in touch with the girls. They really miss you Tina.” Bette’s voice broke. She brushed her lips on Tina’s cheek as she left.
2008- American Airlines, Flight 5
“God, T- I hope you know I wasn’t angry with YOU that night. I would never intentionally try to hurt you.”
You wanted to leave and I wouldn’t let you… I knew you wanted to get up but I was scared… I was so scared Tina,” she whispered.
“But Tina…. I wish to God I’d asked for your forgiveness… I wish I’d asked you to forgive me anyway.” Bette openly wept her regret.
‘I forgive you Bette. I pretty much forgave you a long time ago. But, you gave me words for it. Thank you.”
Tina released Bette after a few moments giving them some distance. Bette sat back in her seat, observing her ex closely.
Tina rubbed her neck, thoughtfully. “I’m not completely sure,’ she smiled.
Bette started to object. Tina silenced her with a look.
Bette wavered before nodding her agreement.
And I needed it. I didn’t realize how much before but I did Bette. I needed to tell you how much you hurt me, how angry I was,” Tina admitted.
Tina bit her lip softly, and considered her response.
“There were no words that you could have used Bette that would have ‘fixed’ things and made it easier for me to come home. I needed time and perspective.”
Bette’s eyes filled, returning Tina’s sad smile.
******************
“Hot towel?”
Bette silently gestured for two. The steward, using tongs, placed two rolled up, steaming face clothes on the arm table between them.
Bette thanked him and silently handed one toward Tina.
“Thank you,” the blonde murmured, unrolling the hot towel. She brought it to her face and laid it flat again her- moaning her pleasure.
Bette swallowed, involuntarily reacting to Tina’s moan. A hot flush spread thru her from more than her own hot towel.
“What time do you have,” she asked, checking her own watch.
“Almost seven,” Tina confirmed.
They exchanged a guarded glance, each wondering what the other was thinking.
“We land around eight, right?” Tina raised an eyebrow.
“I think so,” Bette nodded. Tina nodded back.
“Well… I should go freshen up. I need to make myself presentable for the office,” Tina decided, gathering together her toiletry bag and make up.
“You look beautiful,” Bette protested, without thinking. She blushed immediately. Tina smiled with pleasure at the compliment.
Reaching behind Bette’s seat, Tina rose and tried to extract herself from the row without making Bette get up. Using the headrest for support she straddled in front of Bette, pausing for a moment in front of the brunette with an arm extended on either side of Bette’s frame. They were face to face and Tina found the smell of Bette’s shampoo intoxicating. Exchanging a quick knowing glance with Bette, Tina continued her way into the aisle.
“Oh yeah. I am so screwed,” Bette whispered to herself watching Tina exit the cabin. She signaled to their steward for more coffee.
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Hmmm… while this is a really good story, and you’re writing it well, I’m still not on board with Tina viewing that night as rape. Like, what’s Tina’s part in what happened? Just as victim? There was *no* violence on Tina’s part? None at all? Anyway, I guess I’m waiting to see Bette’s complete take on it, if they discuss it any farther. I’m looking forward to see how the story progresses, since the flight is almost over and NY is beckoning. Thanks for the chapter, Zuzu, and I hope you post soon. cheers
I’ve reread chapter 1, to further get my bearings. Tina wanted a connection, yet made one through violence, all whilst telling herself it’s not real… Bette can’t let guilt make her accept Tina’s version, and agree to disagree, on something that kind of… vital (maybe the wrong word?)… I’m just gonna wait for the next chapter. Thanks again, Z.
hey I was wondering where this story went. glad to see u back.
i hope tina feels like she’s screwed too…as for the rape, i think u have 2 b one of the 2 people in the relationship to view that scenario with all it’s complexities…it’s not a black and white thing…well done with the intensity, pps
Like jp22, I’d be interested in learning more about Bette’s recollection of Provocations night. Also, how does Tina regard her violent actions toward Bette that night? Does she feel guilty? Or perhaps she’s blocked out the memory? Anyway, the story is as compelling as ever.
Hmm…intense stuff from the past. Please, please let them process their stuff and continue moving toward a plausible reconciliation!
Thank goodness you brought the story back! I was so missing the intense discussion as well as the wonderful reflections on the past. You have constructed a wonderful story that simply pulls the reader inward. Bette’s line at the end is so perfect. She really is screwed – Tina remains distant and yet they both know there is no other connection like their own. I hope you post the next chapter soon. By the way, it may just be my take on Bette’s character but I don’t see her leaving the meeting at Tina’s office so easily. I would have thought there would be much more drama since Bette was essentially realizing that the love of her life did not want to see her again. Since I don’t know where you are going with the story, I am guessing that they have another encounter at some point where more discussion ensues. At some point, I definitely want to see a passionate reconciliation!
Recalling”The Scene” in S1, it didn’t appear to be rape b/c Tina forced Bette’s fingers/hand into her. It was certainly violent, rough sex but it seemed to me that Tina wanted sex that way. PPS.
I have to agree with some of readers. Why I think this is very interesting story and this particular part of the breakup is rarely explored,if we are looking at the S1 one scene then I don’t think its rape. I mean Tina turn the tables and force entry.
thanks for the update! i’m agreeing with most of what the other readers have said… maybe tina isn’t remember everything? waiting for the next update:)PPS
Once again, Tina’s resoluteness and determination not to succumb to her lingering love for Bette is chilling. Healthy, but chilling, I am sure, for the other party, Bette. You write so well that the pain of the processing is as joyful to read as watching someone swinging in a park on a summer’s day, if you get what I mean. It’s good stuff. Thanks!
Glad to see an update on this. The talking was needed long ago, but I think Tina is right, they could not have had this conversation back then. All things considered I still hoping with my entire Tibette heart that they get back together.
I must say that I still can’t agree with Tina’s perception of that event and agree with others who have commented that Tina appears to have conveiently forgotten the things she did that night. Certainly there were extenuating circumstances that contributed to Tina’s response that night, but after 5 years, time should have lent some perspective to her memories and led to at least an understanding of Bette’s point of view. Maybe this will be ferreted out in future chapters, but your story has been told masterfully so far. Can’t wait for your next update.
I guess I see it as a mutual rape, Tina was a participant in the violence as much as Bette was. I hope they really can find some way to reach one another. I don’t think Tina realizes she was slipping away from Bette all along and really did destroy Bette.
i went back to read this story from chapter1. it’s so good. please post soon! can’t wait to see what happens
Glad that you are back and continuing to write this story. I hope that they will continue to converse as they depart the plane and go on with their lives.
Love your writing but I too am of the opinion that incredibly powerful scene was about shatterd love and clinging to what one had lost – it was desperate on both of their parts and I think Bette should have stopped it but I think she knew once she did Tina would be gone. Anyway I do love your writing.
This is so good and love it!
Zuzu, you’re back! I’m ecstatic! Loads of people have been talking about the ‘rape’ issue. I will admit, like Bette, it makes me cringe thinking about it as rape. But it is definately a possible view that Tina could have on the situation. I think its something, that not many writers have explored as a possibility and well done for doing that. I’m not sure to what point Tina has justified it though, and it definately continues to hurt Bette, so I don’t know where it will leave them, if they agree to disagree on something so vital to their relationship. Anyway, aside from that.. I am dying to have more 2008 stuff. There’s only an hour left and I do believe you said that you’re a firm Tibette Beliver.. and I’m trusting you. Ooff, this was a long one. Thanks for the lovely update. Cant wait for 8.
Okay, so i re-read all the chapters. And now.. Ive just re-watched the figth scence in the season 1 finale. And Tina really does Instigate a huge amount of the violence, although Bette definately was forcing herself on to Tina.. but still I dont know. Im torn. Its a wonderfully intriging fic. Hurry with the next one. Lol, Nr
i am enjoying this story very much. more please.
I’ve been waiting for this! It has to continue after they land… doesn’t it? PPS :)
Rape is a harsh word. I recall we had many, many pages of heated debates about this over on TWOP. Tina was an instigator of the violence, as well. I’ll never forget that slap, or the awful bites. Bette is a beautiful woman. I’m sure she was shamefully disfigured for quite a while. Once the ball got rolling, both of them were equal participants, in my view. Tina took Bette’s hand to that place, let’s not forget. I think Tina was and is being a bit superior about it. I think she should have forgiven Bette. Perhaps the accumulation of all the brow-beating she took from Bette over the course of her relationship came home to roost. Of course, we debated that ad infinitum as well. Tina took all that sh_ _ from Bette, and she still cheated on her anyway. Thanks for making a painful story palatable through the gauze of history. And we know how much IC loves gauze.
P.S.: I thought you were ending it here, just as it probably would be in real life. I’m glad you’re continuing. You are continuing, aren’t you?
for me THAT night was a struggle for power, i never viewed it as rape but as break-up sex, angry sex, power sex…it’s still painful to watch but it’s still one of the most powerful scenes in season 1 for me