«Um» Alice took a deep breath, praying to God she wasn’t going to die. Then she just let it all out of her mouth, quickly «Tina told me what happened» she said it with eyes closed not wanting to see the rage on Bette’s face. She waited, staying like that. Eyes closed; holding her breath. But then the miracle happened…

           «Fuck… » Bette whispered. Just Fuck, no outburst or anything like that. Alice was practically shocked. She was expecting to assist to one of Bette’s famous ireful moments, but she didn’t. Instead, she was calm. And it was scarier!

           «Okay, that’s not what I was expecting» Alice admitted, «But I’m kinda happy you didn’t kill me»

           «Yeah» Bette let out a small chuckle, «Well, Tina and I are the one who fucked up. If there’s someone I should kill, that would be me» she sighed.

           «This is fucked up, Bette» she said the same thing to Tina earlier.

           «I know, Alice. I know» she rubbed her face with both her hands.

           «What the hell were you thinking? »

           «The thing is I didn’t think at all» she said matter-of-factly.

           «You didn’t think as in ‘you didn’t think when you did it with Candace’? »

           «Oh for Christ’s sake, Alice, are you fucking serious? Jesus! » she looked at Alice with a stunned expression.

           «Okay sorry! I’m sorry. What do you mean by ‘you didn’t think’? »

           «I- I don’t know Alice, it just felt right, you know? I mean we were together for eight years and well, being with her was just right » she stopped herself, trying to formulate a proper answer.

           «But you’re still with Jodi»

           «I know»

           «And you also know that it isn’t fair to Tina, neither to Jodi»

           «I know»

           «So you understand that Tina can’t go on like that»

           «Yeah, but it doesn’t excuse the fact that she wants to take Angelica with her»

           «Then make up your fucking mind and take your woman – your family back! »

           «I can’t» she said in a whisperer that could be barely heard.

           «Why? »

           «Because I’m scared of losing her again and this time I won’t be able to survive » she admitted.

           «But you don’t know that! »

           «But it’s still a possibility»

           «Not if you two don’t make the same old mistakes» she replied, «Jesus, where did Bette Porter – the real one go? The one who never stops fighting to be able to achieve her own target; the one who always gets what she wants. Where the fuck did you go? » Alice said, almost yelling. She was mad at Bette; she so wanted to make her understand how much Tina and she loved each other but she just couldn’t see it. How could she be so blind? «You love her, I know you do! And I know you want to be with her. Just fucking do it! Be with her. Jesus Christ, you have this huge chance to be with the one you love… she’s here. She’s here, no one and nothing took her away from you. She’s still here, she wants to be with you and you can still be with her. Don’t make my same mistake… fight for her, before it’s too late…» tears started running down her cheeks. She brought her hands on her mouth, trying to hold back her own sobs. «I’m sorry» she managed to say. Her love for Dana was still strong and this sudden outburst was a clear demonstration. Bette knew her friend was right. She was looking at a woman who lost the love of her life because something stronger than love took her away from her. She, indeed, was lucky to have Tina still there with her. She just hoped she could find the strength to make a decision.