Dana reached out automatically to steady Lara even as she mentally panicked. Suddenly she felt as awkward as when they had first met: ***** more so. All thoughts of panic and awkwardness though, flew from her mind as their eyes locked. Within the flurry of movements as they each found their own balance she watched– mesmerized as Laras lips parted: Moist and lush. Her skin shone under the harsh fluorescent lights of the locker room ceilings, a flushed red. Whether it was from anger or the heat, Dana could not be sure– at the moment– it didnt seem to matter. All that mattered was that Lara was standing here in front of her, smelling like citrus and strawberries and sunrise just before it hit the Highland hills. She was here and for the first time in an eternity, she was able to gaze into those impossibly colored eyes and be swept away. The world was a dizzy tilt-a-whirl and she could not find the sentences to express what she wanted to say.

I love you, I hate you, I need you, I cant live without you. The words swirled within her being, crashing through her heart: fury, sorrow, honesty, and regret. It all came tumbling out with a finite edge of desperation but through it all, Lara just kept looking at her”unmoving, untouched. When the tide of her had emotions ebbed, and Dana found she could speak no more, she stopped. The silence pressed on in the wake of her quiet, and like a prisoner waiting for the sentence of a vindictive jury, Dana waited. Hope, a struggling sparrow waiting to soar.
***

Lara struggled not to soften towards Dana yet despite her better judgment, she could feel her eyes swell with tears threatening to spill. The air seemed suddenly thicker and heavier as Dana drew close, and as her pleading voice tearing at the precious healing wound in Laras heart, she could not suppress the pressing urge to run. To get away from the love that Dana offered because it came with so much hurt. She didnt need this. She didnt need the uncertainty that came with their relationship. Didnt need the insecurities Dana still harbored. Didnt need to feel the warmth of her embrace or the quiet moments of precious laughter after shared humor. Didnt need to feel the devastation when it was all just taken away. She wanted to move on and never think about Dana Fairbanks ever again and a part of her would give anything to pull Dana into her arms to soothe away the hurt furrowing her brows. She was torn and she didnt know what to do, yet even as these thoughts fluttered through her mind, her body was already moving of its own accord. Like a faraway audience watching the screening of a film, Lara saw herself move towards Dana, caressing away the tears that had begun to course silently down the other womans cheek. Like a dream she heard herself murmur sweet nothings and inane promises into hair the scent of jasmine just blooming in Spring.
Its okay sweetheart, she heard herself say, its okay.
Im so sorry, Dana sobbed. I really fucked up. I-I was just so-so afraid!
Its okay. Lara soothed, running her fingers over and over through Danas dark tresses. Suddenly all of the pain shed gone through just didnt matter anymore. The woman she loved was hurt. Hurt because of her, and the Whys no longer mattered, the What ifs even less so. All that mattered was the solid feel of the woman in her arms, and her need to make it all better. Peace settled within her being. She knew it wasnt going to be easy, but they would get through it. It had been wrong to push when she did. She knew that now. This time it would be different, this time, she was going to support her love. Dana would get out of her shell eventually, and she would simply be one of the privileged spectators who got to witness her coming out.

In the shadows of a locker room, two people exchanged silent promises sacred to human hearts. Two women held on to each other rocking each other, comforting each other: And two lovers reveled in one another, exchanging soft murmurs and even gentler kisses.