Gathering her thoughts, Tina finally replied. It crossed my mind, but only you know who you really are.

Mandy remained quiet.

Why do you ask, Mandy?

Just curious. The thought crossed my mind once or twice to be honest, but Im not. I never really dated in high school or college, did I?

Tina shook her head. You were so busy though.

I know. Between all my biology labs and cross country and track, I barely had time to eat. I liked boys and some asked me out, but I just didnt have the energy to start something like that. Now I regret it. I feel like I missed out on a significant part of my life.

You didnt miss out on much, Mandy. I always admired your dedication to school and your running. I always wished I had your endurance and smarts.

They stepped out of the car and walked into the airport. Seeing they were a good forty-five minutes early, they headed to a bagel shop for coffee and breakfast. Their conversation continued as they walked.

It would have been good to have had a balance with things. Mandy said.

True, but whats done is done. I mean, look at me. I dated guys and did well in school, but the only thing that came of it was going on to grad school and getting a great job. The boys just held me back. I wouldve been better not dating them so I could focus on what was really inside of me.

Then you might have never met Bette. Mandy pointed out.

Youre right. Everything happens for a reason I guess. Tina sighed, thinking about what she just said. Her thoughts drifted to Adam, and she knew Mandys had gone to the same place. She regretted what she said, not wanting to bring up the tragic memory.

So Adam died for a reason? Mandy quietly asked.

I cant answer that, Mandy. I dont know why it happened. I wish it didnt… with all my heart, but I cant change it.

Mandys eyes welled up with tears. Why cant I stop thinking about it? Tina, will this ever end, this hurt? I wake up every morning thinking about it. When will that stop?