Al makes the best tea. Green tea, to help boost my immune system, she says, with organic honey and ginger crystals. I sigh happily and Alice gives me a more genuine smile.

"Tea fixes everything, right?"

I nod. "Yours does." She sits on the armchair and we fall into silence. As usual, I can’t tell what she’s thinking and it makes me uneasy.

"Did you have fun tonight?" Alice asks, toying with the tea bag from her own mug.

"Yeah, I did. It was good to see everyone and get out of the house…" I trail off as I watch her eyes glaze over. "Al, are you listening to a word I’m saying?"

She blinks rapidly. "What? Of course I’m listening to you. Why wouldn’t I be listening?"

I look at her strangely. "Uh, I don’t know. But you seemed pretty far away when I was talking."

"No, no…I was just wondering if this party might have been overkill. You know, too much too soon."

I laugh. "Is that what you’re freaking out about? Al, aren’t you the one who wanted me to get out of the house in the first place?"

Alice looks bothered. "I wanted you to get out of the house, not push you to the point of exhaustion."

"Alice." I say softly, sensing she is truly worried, not just blowing smoke, "I had cancer. I just don’t have the same level of energy I used to have. That doesn’t mean that a night out with our friends is going to send me into a relaspe. I’m tired, that’s all. It’s normal."

"I know," she replies, although she seems relieved to have heard this come from me. "I worry, that’s all."

"You don’t have to." I tell her affirmatedly, our eyes locking. Damn, I wish I could read her. I can’t tell where her concern is coming from. Well, I know where it’s coming from; she is my best friend. I just wish I knew if it was only a friendly type of concern or something more. Something I had hoped for.

"Anyway," she sprang up from the armchair, nearly spilling her half full tea cup in the process. "I’m gonna head to bed. See you in the morning."

She bends toward me, brushing my cheek with her lips, ever so softly. My heart pounds as her hair tickles my face, her breath warm. She makes no move to pull away and I know that it’s now or never. Weeks of handfuls of awkward moments have been leading up to this and this is it. It is only right that I make things right when it was me who made them so wrong in the first place.