Until now Melvin had had no idea of the sacrifices Tina made to be with Bette and the implications to her family relationships. Melvin was contrite enough to realize that she didn’t tell him her story to get sympathy but more to point out the parallels of his own behavior. But it was her next words that tested the veracity of the changes in his views.

“To be honest Melvin, as much as I couldn’t abide my family’s small-minded ignorance, I had to respect that it was an honest reaction. It hurt to cut all ties with them, but after witnessing what Bette had to endure with your brand of hypocritical tolerance and conditional love, I think my situation was far better. I knew that you were not particularly accepting of our relationship, but I never imagined such vile cruelty would be spewed on us as when we told you about our pregnancy.”

Melvin: This child, you’re going to be taking care of it and Ms. Kennard?

Melvin: That is biologically impossible unless there has been a medical breakthrough that I don’t know anything about, the possibility that this child will be my grandchild does not exist. Therefore, I am happy if that is what you want in your friendship with Ms. Kennard, but I can’t realistically be asked to participate in this fiction of your creation.

“I’ll have you know this child that I’m carrying was conceived by insemination using the same sperm donor as the grandson you so vehemently rejected. You disparaged my pregnancy for using the sperm of an African American man to reflect who we are and to give our children a sense of heritage and belonging when we are so limited by biology.

The donor, Marcus Allenwood is a friend of Bette’s. She found him for us after a very exhausting search to find the right man. She was so excited when he agreed to be our donor, that she didn’t even think to tell me he was African American. I admit to having doubts about otherness for our child being bi-racial and having two mothers. I even doubted my own ability to raise a child that was half-Black, but that was my own insecurities; not discrimination. I don’t see Black or White when I look at Bette. I just see the woman I love and the only person I wanted to have a family with. When she cheated on me, I didn’t know if I could ever reconcile with her as a spouse, but I had no doubt that she was this baby’s mother and that we were equal partners in raising her as a family.