I’m from Jamaica, New York a neighborhood in the Queens borough. I was born and raised there and one night while clubbing with some friends I met Bette who was hanging out with some of her lady friends too. She saw me and I saw her and the next thing I knew is we were drinking, dancing, and holding each other and before I could catch my breath her lips were planted on mine in the stall of  the ladies bathroom adjacent to the dj floor. From that day I couldn’t resist Bette and she couldn’t resist me. I’ve been day dreaming about her and have found it very hard to concentrate on being a teacher at the local school and being a Christian on Sunday in church with my parents. I feel like I’ve been pulled in the right direction for my sake but at the same time I feel like being gay is a sin because of what my parents and relatives stress over and over, well everyone except for my baby sister Jess. She seems to understand me the most and even though she is the second person I’ve told besides Christa (the secretary at the school) being gay has been a secret and I’m not ready to put myself out there.

 The world can be crucial and my feelings are sensitive and I’m not ready to face assholes just yet, but sooner or later I’ll approach the world head strong with no feel of regrets or shame but with pride and dignity. And I hope that when I decide to stand tall that Bette will stand with me because she’s already tall and she has the slightest clue as to how close I am to coming out fully. As she drives down Sunset, I gaze over and catch her stealing a glance of me I smile and turn away with butterflies in my stomach and goose bumps all over.

“We’re home!” Bette shouts causing me to look out the window to see what she was smiling so happily about-it was her house. It was green with canary-yellow colored paint around the windows and door frame with navy blue shutters and a navy blue door. She had nice patches of green grass that surrounded the path that led up the steps onto the veranda.